Insults without swears

[nought_0]

You're not fit to scrub the floors of the brothel your mother birthed you in.

 

[MagnetoHydroDynamics]

You face is strangely similar to the north end of a southbound mule.

 

[laughing man z]

chutney ferret
marmite miner
uphill gardener
hollyoaks fan

all valid insults

 

[General Ken8]

Can i borrow your face for a few days while my butt's on vacation?
Not incredibly insulting but it is fun to see what people think of it

 

[Zorg Machine]

you stupid cakesniffer
(cookies for those who get reference)

 

[chunkynut]

Sausage Wallet.

Think about it ...

 

[SmartIdiot]

Rapscallion, nincompoop (that looks really weird now that I type it).

Sausage Wallet.

That one.

chutney ferret
marmite miner
uphill gardener
hollyoaks fan

All of these (I didn't realise anyone else used them!)

And to finish, mayonaise gargler, spoon lover, cheese weasel.

 

[Goenitz]

Thou art spherical, like a globe. I could find out countries in you!
Scratching could not make it worse, such a face as yours!
Thou smell of mountain goat.
Thou elvish-mark'd, abortive, rooting hog.
Out of my sight! Thou dost infect my eyes.

Oh yeah. Shakespeare for the win.

Cant argue with a classic.

 

[Steindorh]

You should have been swallowed at conception.

I won't be quoting any local swearing, since most of it is either full of swear words or kind of embarrassingly bad to anyone from a different country.

 

[TheRightToArmBears]

Silence, you lecherous cretin!

Scum is another favorite of mine, along with plebian.

 

[KedynCrow]

Thou rapacious, mangy, lop-eared son of a blind piebald pig.

Thou mouldy, mad-brained jack-a-nape.

You really can't argue with the Bard.

 

[Gebi10000]

you are an ape , homo sapiens sapiens, whose parents are probably enbodyments of the proportion phi.
use this one with uneducated people. the reactions range from confused, to downright violent

 

[Woem]

Call them vegetarians?

Or ill-informed.

 

[Spitfire175]

Call them vegetarians?

Or ill-informed.

You do realise I was joking, right?

 

[oppp7]

Noob. Insulting and it's not a swear.

 

[Woem]

Call them vegetarians?

Or ill-informed.

You do realise I was joking, right?

 

[nought_0]

Bite me, you pee-drinkers.

 

[nought_0]

Come to think of it, the only time I ever got someone in TF2 to rage quit was by telling them
"You have no honour."

 

[NinjaSkills]

YOUR MOTHER WAS A HAMSTER AND YOUR FATHER SMELLS OF ELDERBERRIES!!!