It's impossible to be sexy when...

[Colour Scientist]

Everyone likes to feel attractive but we all know that it's not always possible.

For example, it's near-impossible to remain composed and sexy when taking off a pair of really tight skinny jeans. It just doesn't work, at least not for me anyway.
I also tend to make a stupid face whenever I'm putting on mascara. My eyes are normally open really wide and my mouth hangs open a bit, it's not a good look.

So, what are those things you find difficult to do while keeping your allure? Alternatively, this thread is just supposed to be a bit of fun so you can choose things that you find impossible to do without looking downright stupid.

 

[Socius]

It's impossible to look good whilst eating Tacos.
They break and make a mess of things, or they drip sauce down over your hands or something else that is equally unappetizing. If you're enjoying a taco, the only thing that actually looks appetizing is the taco itself.

 

[Euryalus]

When you do everything the way I do? Hey Oh!

Pulling out the nerdy self conscious stereotype jokes here. I'm a genius. I'll be here all week.

Seriously though...

I have really shit posture sometimes, and when I play video games on my pc or am just reading a book anywhere that involves sitting, rather than laying, then I'm basically hunched over like a troll.

I also refuse to believe that anyone can look sexy eating sloppy joes or ribs so I'll throw those in the ring as well.

 

[Andy Shandy]

You look, walk and talk like me? XD

Seriously (somewhat) though, and I say this as someone who wears them a lot (around the house), you can't look sexy in tracksuit trousers. As comfy as they can be to wear (and that's why I wear them), I don't think they can ever look attractive =P

Which is fine for me XD

 

[lacktheknack]

When I eat saucy foods (NOT THAT KIND OF SAUCY (... usually...)), I tend to eat them really quickly and messily, hoping the unattractive spills on my face are overcome by the pure sexiness that is an oral sex replication.

It never works, and my Mom always tells me to stop it. ;___;

It's also impossible for me to remain attractive whenever my shirt comes off. Or when I go biking (all bikes are too tiny). Or both.

 

[Ninjamedic]

So, what are those things you find difficult to do while keeping your allure?

Nothing, I'm always in a perpetual state of being irresistible.

Seriously though, near everything for me, I'm a complete mess of stress awkwardness and occasional hyperactivity. I always look like I'm either: Murderous, Spaced out, 12, panicking or all of the above.

Though I was once complemented by a drunk guy on a train who thought I was a girl.

 

[Kevlar Eater]

I don't think anyone can look sexy when eating spaghetti. The sauce spreading around the mouth, making the person look like someone applied lipstick while dizzy (red sauce) or looks like a particularly messy facial (white sauce).

But personally, I've seen myself work out in front of a mirror, and the faces I make when I strain make me look constipated. Add squats and a pool of sweat and I may as well be imitating Elvis Presley on the toilet.

 

[MrSir231]

I don't think anyone can look sexy when eating spaghetti. The sauce spreading around the mouth, making the person look like someone applied lipstick while dizzy (red sauce) or looks like a particularly messy facial (white sauce).

I don't know, I can eat spaghetti in a very seductive manner.

 

[Daystar Clarion]

Daystar is always sexy.

Except when he's not.

Then he's super sexy.

Honestly, legs just just part when I walk down the street.

It's a curse, really.

A sexy curse.

 

[Colour Scientist]

Nothing, I'm always in a perpetual state of being irresistible.

I was wondering how long it would take for someone to post that answer.

I haven't seen you around for a while!

It's impossible to be sexy when your username is Colour Scientist

Hey!
Do you want a fight?

 

[The Funslinger]

Nothing, I'm always in a perpetual state of being irresistible.

I was wondering how long it would take for someone to post that answer.

I haven't seen you around for a while!

It's impossible to be sexy when your username is Colour Scientist

Hey!
Do you want a fight?

Don't do it, DVS. She's crazy. She'll stab you in the neck with a broken Jameson's bottle.

OT: When I'm at work. I wear crocs in the kitchen. Fucken crocs.

 

[Fappy]

Daystar is always sexy.

Except when he's not.

Then he's super sexy.

Honestly, legs just just part when I walk down the street.

It's a curse, really.

A sexy curse.

Please, the only time you're sexy is when you're doing your "pet dog" routine. I do it admit, you look sexy with a chain leash around your neck.

OT: Only time I am not in sexy overload mode is when I am feeling really gassy. Even then, I have some pretty sexy farts.

 

[Andy Shandy]

Nothing, I'm always in a perpetual state of being irresistible.

I was wondering how long it would take for someone to post that answer.

I haven't seen you around for a while!

It's impossible to be sexy when your username is Colour Scientist

Hey!
Do you want a fight?

Don't do it, DVS. She's crazy. She'll stab you in the neck with a broken Jameson's bottle.

That's not crazy, that's just Irish.

[sub]Although I'm not exactly one to talk, being Scottish and all. XD[/sub]

 

[Ninjamedic]

I was wondering how long it would take for someone to post that answer.

I beat Daystar to it. My job is done.

I haven't seen you around for a while!

Well as the Voice of Reason, I found myself out a job during the past while. Did I miss anything?

 

[Albino Boo]

Its impoissible to be sxey when cuaght having sex with someone's wife. The whole trousers round the ankles and the strong desire to run just ruins the moment.

 

[Daystar Clarion]

sexy snip

Fappeh pls, we know you can't get enough of this.

Deny it all you want.

 

[Colour Scientist]

Don't do it, DVS. She's crazy. She'll stab you in the neck with a broken Jameson's bottle.

That's not crazy, that's just Irish.
XD

Xenophobia isn't sexy, guys!

Well as the Voice of Reason, I found myself out a job during the past while. Did I miss anything?

Really?
That's great!
Is it relevant to your course or is it a part time thing?

Eh, probably not, I can't think of anything.

 

[Ninjamedic]

Really?
That's great!
Is it relevant to your course or is it a part time thing?

..........I meant that as a joke that I was out of a job as Reason left Off-Topic.

Though on that note, I'm applying for Work Placement right now. May end up in Dublin!

 

[Yuno Gasai]

For example, it's near-impossible to remain composed and sexy when taking off a pair of really tight skinny jeans. It just doesn't work, at least not for me anyway.

Oh, god yes. I guess the wiggle I do when trying to put on/take off skinny jeans can be a little endearing, but it's definitely not sexy or alluring. It's also something I hate doing in front of partners. I'd rather keep an air of intrigue and mystery before we do Interesting and Questionable Sexual Acts rather than letting them watch me awkwardly wriggle and twist myself in/out of jeans.

Another thing I struggle to look sexy while doing is reading and/or playing games. I get this weird "concentration face" that looks really unattractive. I'd rather nobody ever saw it again.