Jesus-ifying Zero Punctuation

[Arkhangelsk]

I almost ripped it off her.

You sure that weren't for completely unrelated reasons?... I'm kidding.

I'm guessing Yahtzee is getting such a status that he needs a cult.

 

[MrBlackers]

And where did you learn that little nugget?

Common sense, dude.
If there is a God, (and I personally do not believe there is, but that won't stand in my way when it comes to being silly,) it's got to be a she.

After all, I've had girls controlling my life in various ways for years - why break the mold now?
It just doesn't seem right that anything but a female has unlimited power over me.

(And no, I do not mean it like that - my friends are just very strong, personality-wise.)

EDIT: Additional point: Why should God be a he?

...w-wait...WHAT?

OP: What exactly was "Christian" about it?

It probably said something like "Jesus kicks ass, bitches?"
It's what mine would say if I were religious.

Nice rant there Max, and oh so true. On topic its just what the church does. Take something popular, rehash it with a faith inspired design, sell and repeat.

I've done better, but that definitely wasn't my worst.

EDIT: BTW Christians acknowledge that the 25th of December was ripped off from pagans, at least my branch does, so no need to hide it from us.

Well, first there is no "Church", unless you mean the Catholic Church...Which I really doubt is responsible since it's more of a protestant thing to make up WWJD and such. And lol at your defense for God being a woman, it's rather hilarious, but I mean that's nothing but a modern look back at patriarchy and saying it's bad so you as "the awesome atheist of today" get to call anyone who says anything with a he in it stupid. Ughh..There goes my rant.
*Bows* Thank you, thank you, I'll be here 'till they ban me.

 

[MrBlackers]

Well, first there is no "Church", unless you mean the Catholic Church...Which I really doubt is responsible since it's more of a protestant thing to make up WWJD and such. And lol at your defense for God being a woman, it's rather hilarious, but I mean that's nothing but a modern look back at patriarchy and saying it's bad so you as "the awesome atheist of today" get to call anyone who says anything with a he in it stupid. Ughh..There goes my rant.

Bolded the part I care about.
It wasn't a serious argument - it was just a silly joke.
If it was hilarious, I did my job.

Well good you've made me laugh. Honestly, a bit hard to tell joke from seriousness on the internet. I'm so very used to seeing ignorant assertions people make to make themselves feel good, which is ironic if you're an atheist since that's an argument used against religion that it is a tool of self indulgence. But again, good joke.

 

[Deathsquirt]

Rumor has it that flying spaghetti monsters don't actually have genders.

 

[ghalkhsdkssakgh]

On that subject though, I think anyone owning one of those bumper stickers showing Calvin from C&H prostrate before a cross deserves to have their windows smashed.

I've never seen one but, agreed, that's the same as making C&H porn for me. x_x

O_O

Thank you for putting officially the most distubing images ever into my head. I will now go and cleanse my mind with acid.

 

[MrBlackers]

Well good you've made me laugh. Honestly, a bit hard to tell joke from seriousness on the internet. I'm so very used to seeing ignorant assertions people make to make themselves feel good, which is ironic if you're an atheist since that's an argument used against religion that it is a tool of self indulgence. But again, good joke.

Well, I'd try to joke about atheism, but there's nothing really funny about it - it doesn't have any rules or anything. It's not like a club, it's just a fancy way of saying "I don't believe in god."

I make religious jokes for the same reason I make sex jokes - I don't have sex (or religion,) but that's not a reason not to be silly about it.

If someone gets offended for a good reason, I'll apologize. If not, I won't.

And yes, it is difficult to tell sometimes.

And you don't have to worry - I never feel good.
I am...Depression Man!

No need to apologize, no offense taken, and it wouldn't have been for a good reason. And you can joke about atheism, but only in a snide way, not in a really funny way.

 

[TheBurningFist]

Beats me?... money, they can do what they want, kind of stuff... ?verbal vomit? and other stuff like that...

 

[Ridonculous_Ninja]

Well good you've made me laugh. Honestly, a bit hard to tell joke from seriousness on the internet. I'm so very used to seeing ignorant assertions people make to make themselves feel good, which is ironic if you're an atheist since that's an argument used against religion that it is a tool of self indulgence. But again, good joke.

Well, I'd try to joke about atheism, but there's nothing really funny about it - it doesn't have any rules or anything. It's not like a club, it's just a fancy way of saying "I don't believe in god."

I make religious jokes for the same reason I make sex jokes - I don't have sex (or religion,) but that's not a reason not to be silly about it.

If someone gets offended for a good reason, I'll apologize. If not, I won't.

And yes, it is difficult to tell sometimes.

And you don't have to worry - I never feel good.
I am...Depression Man!

HIDING IN VALLYS AND DITCHES!

...

That was bad...

I'm sorry, I just couldn't resist that.

 

[kemosabi4]

They like to think designing a t-shirt around something popular will draw in kids to religion. I saw one with the 1UP mushroom from Mario, talking about how it gave you infinite life, or some shit.

 

[HobbesMkii]

Christians are pretty good at adopting popular practices and symbols as their own. Just ask about why Christmas falls on the 25th! (Hint: It ain't Jesus' birthday)

oh oh pick me pick me! *jumping up and down with arm up* its because the gits stole the winter solstice now excuse me while i hide from the Christians.

Actually, no. But don't feel too bad, you're in good company with people who believed this; Isaac Newton made the same mistake.
Christmas' date relates to a Roman holiday called "Sol Invictus" which means "The unconquered sun" (which, in my opinion, is about 1000x more bad-ass than "Christmas" which means "Christ's Mass"). Sol Invictus celebrated a number of popular Roman sun deities, including the Emperor, and the god Mithras, who was a god that was tremendously popular with the Roman Legions. Since early Christians were essentially the Romans' go to for Lion-on-Man action, they tried not to piss off Romans anymore than they could help, resulting in them claiming Sol Invictus as the day of Christ's birth.

So, I guess what I'm trying to say here is that Yahtzee is like Gaming's Mithras. And the Christians are like, well, they're still the Christians.

 

[megapenguinx]

Because they try to ride current trends. ZP is a popular trend so it makes sense that they'd try to cash in on it to appeal to us youth.

 

[SecretTacoNinja]

On that subject though, I think anyone owning one of those bumper stickers showing Calvin from C&H prostrate before a cross deserves to have their windows smashed.

I've never seen one but, agreed, that's the same as making C&H porn for me. x_x

O_O

Thank you for putting officially the most distubing images ever into my head. I will now go and cleanse my mind with acid.

Sorry but you know the saying:

"It's all one big shit sandwich, and we all gotta take a bite"

Damn Rule 34... nearly ruined Pokemon for me...

 

[Shycte]

Because they thought it would be a fun idea that they could make money of?

Why are you being offended by this? Seriously, like what the fuck?

 

[ghalkhsdkssakgh]

On that subject though, I think anyone owning one of those bumper stickers showing Calvin from C&H prostrate before a cross deserves to have their windows smashed.

I've never seen one but, agreed, that's the same as making C&H porn for me. x_x

O_O

Thank you for putting officially the most distubing images ever into my head. I will now go and cleanse my mind with acid.

Sorry but you know the saying:

"It's all one big shit sandwich, and we all gotta take a bite"

Damn Rule 34... nearly ruined Pokemon for me...

I honestly didn't know that phrase, but I will now try to work it into everyday conversation at least once a day.

 

[master m99]

Christians are pretty good at adopting popular practices and symbols as their own. Just ask about why Christmas falls on the 25th! (Hint: It ain't Jesus' birthday)

oh oh pick me pick me! *jumping up and down with arm up* its because the gits stole the winter solstice now excuse me while i hide from the Christians.

Actually, no. But don't feel too bad, you're in good company with people who believed this; Isaac Newton made the same mistake.
Christmas' date relates to a Roman holiday called "Sol Invictus" which means "The unconquered sun" (which, in my opinion, is about 1000x more bad-ass than "Christmas" which means "Christ's Mass"). Sol Invictus celebrated a number of popular Roman sun deities, including the Emperor, and the god Mithras, who was a god that was tremendously popular with the Roman Legions. Since early Christians were essentially the Romans' go to for Lion-on-Man action, they tried not to piss off Romans anymore than they could help, resulting in them claiming Sol Invictus as the day of Christ's birth.

So, I guess what I'm trying to say here is that Yahtzee is like Gaming's Mithras. And the Christians are like, well, they're still the Christians.

oh thanks now i know =)

 

[SamuelT]

Pics or it didn't happen

...Because taking photo's of random people isn't at all creepy and stalker-esque?