Let's Remake Star Wars

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Canadish

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Jul 15, 2010
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No.

Just...no.

Sure, someone who "got" the original trilogy COULD end up in charge and do a great job of both bringing the story into a modern era, while respecting the originals themes and messages and paying homage, while ALSO making it engaging and visually interesting (but not a CGI clusterfuck).

More likely, they'd get some hack, making a 2 hour toy commercial with the names of the original characters slapped on top of the bases for the new action figures, while cramming in several "respected" hollywood names and a few of the new up and coming actors, with half of them being rubbish and the other half trying their best to fight the awful dialogue.

I know Bob has decided that the Prequels weren't all that bad in his mind...but they are. They just are.
And a remake would probably be even worse.
 

Tiamat666

Level 80 Legendary Postlord
Dec 4, 2007
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If someone puts another finger on Star Wars I might have to exterminate them.

Hasn't it suffered enough?
 

el_kabong

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Mar 18, 2010
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All laughs aside, if there's any chance that Lucas can just ruin the old trilogy with a remake and I can get the unaltered (but remastered) originals on Blu-ray... I am willing to take that risk.

It's not like Georgie boy can make it any worse...right?
 

sammysoso

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Jul 6, 2012
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The problem here is that the Star Wars universe is still going, pretty strongly. It's got a popular TV show, the books, comics and games are still coming out at a good pace.

Also, remember all the nerd-rage and butthurt we had to put up with when the prequels came out? Yea, it'd be that x1000.

Although, you could probably get away with remaking the prequels...
 

pilouuuu

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Aug 18, 2009
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That's an horrible idea indeed. There's no need to remake Star Wars. Maybe in some 30 years from now.

Really, remaking movies destroy the status of unique art piece each one has. Why not remake Monalisa? She needs blonde hair and bigger boobs. Or let's remake Liberty Statue and make her thinner and wearing a mini-skirt. Let's remake Beatle songs as dub-step.

Every important movie becomes just a pop-corn flick which is exactly what Hollywood wants, but as movie-goers there's no way we should support that.

Why do we want a Star Wars remake? To make Luke a tween who wants to be a jedi because it's cool and make Obi-Wan a teenager who is in love with princess Leia. And make Obi-Wan fight Vader to the sound of dub-step while they fight making acrobatic jumps and some kind of stupid dance? Should the rebels be replaced by a gungan rebel army too? Yeah, because we need lots of comic relief for this stupid generation to enjoy a movie these days, right Hollywood? Also include more CGI and please make the damn aliens more cartoony! Damn! We don't need a stupid Star Wars remake!

I'm OK with remakes after the original is seriously dated and the new version is truly good and not an excuse to sell the movie to tweeners and dumb fans of explosions.

Some good remakes are King-Kong and the new Planet of the Apes, but most remakes seem to be made for teenager tweens. Please stop the madness, Hollywood!

Well, you can remake Star Wars prequels if you want to. Do whatever you want with those horrid movies. But don't fiddle with original classic trilogy anymore! Especially you, Mr. Lucas! Take your stinkin' paws off those movies, you damn dirty director!

Now, a new movie series in the Star Wars universe like Knights of the Old Republic by some talented director like Peter Jackson, Guillermo del Toro or ever Mr. Spielberg... That could be truly good!
 

Darth_Payn

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Aug 5, 2009
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kajinking said:
Aren't the words "Starwars" and "Remake" considered unholy devil-speak when uttered next to each other according to most hardcore Starwars fans?

\
Aye, 'tis heresy that Bob speaketh!

captcha when, where?
Preferably, never and nowhere.
 

Yabu

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Jun 10, 2012
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Hate to burst your bubble Bob, but the authentic Evil Empire of late, is the US. That being said, maybe it does add an interesting element for the modern version of Star Wars giving a bit of self reflection.
 

SonOfVoorhees

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Aug 3, 2011
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No. You add new movies that are seperate from the original trilogy. 100% original and not based on what came before. New stories and new characters. Make a Mandalorian movie. Make a new character on new planets based in the star wars universe. Brand new stuff.
 

Ashley Blalock

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Sep 25, 2011
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After watching the prequel films I'm just not sure that re-making Star Wars with the no limits of CGI is such a great idea. It kind of seems like the original Star Wars had to be creative because there were limits to what the film crew could do. Just felt like there was more attention to things like detail when a space ship had to be built in miniature instead of programed into a computer.

On the other hand if a new remake could do something better than Ewoks for an ending I'd be all for it. Empire Strikes Back really had a nice dark tone to it and then the series kind of goes down the crapper in the end because the Empire has to be defeated by space teddy bears to appeal to kids.
 

Therumancer

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Nov 28, 2007
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I've been of the opinion for a while that they simply need to do another Star Wars series instead of re-treading the existing story.

When you get down to it, Star Wars was pretty much the same thing as the remake of Battlestar Galactica, just more upbeat, and less heavy handed. It's a universe of prophecy where an all powerful "force" guides people through cycles of good, evil, and balance, using those it favors as it's tools. Indeed a big part of the entire story as spelled out in the prequels is how Anakin is prophecied to "bring balance to the force" and the good guys naively fail to realize that if good is pretty much dominant, balance doesn't mean taking down the now re-appearing bad guys. What's more it's also Papaltine's downfall, after all Anakin wasn't here to "bring darkness" either. When he's done he's basically killed all the good guys AND the bad guys, leaving one mixed up pseudo-Jedi (Luke) who could arguably go either way.... no seriously, think about it. It's also kind of a downer when you realize that if this is about the end of an era of good... it means that despite our little Ewok celebration the bad guys are eventually going to win this one (one way or another), whether that's from Luke turning evil, corruption in the new Republic, or the success of Imperial remnants is not something that it goes into, choosing to end on a high note. To be honest I think when George realized how his work was being received, he decided to try and re-do it to be more straightforward good vs. evil as much as he could, and wanted to make it more uniformly upbeat.


At any rate, what this means is that Star Wars is an ideal property to re-visit all the same ideas and the basic sequence of events, in another timeline. It could be the past or the future, ideally if they did it right it wouldn't be specified because it doesn't matter to the endless cycle (and truthfully one could argue that "The Force" itself might conspire indirectly to keep technology on the same basic level, and answer that question). Done correctly you could change a lot of the specifics, with the same basic events happening, and sort of show what it might look like with a more modern cast and point of view, with it still being canon.

The big question is whether people would really "get" that even if it was explained while the moving was being made.


To be honest, while it goes beyond the scope of a "remake" covering the same material, I've always thought doing the "cycle" idea in reverse would be kind of cool. Have a series where your basic evil Sith empire has already won, it dominates everything, people are being raped and tortured to death in the streets, planets exploited, 99% of the people are serfs, and the leaders live like god kings. Pretty much the opposite of "The Republic". Instead of having some Sith (which nobody remembers exactly what it is) worm his way in whie the force goes cloudy, have some repentant young noble find the teaching of these "Jedi" fellows and undermine the bad guys from within the system, while engaging in "Scarlet Pimpernel"
like heroics. Basically a role reversal with Papaltine as the great hero. At the end he dies heroically, tears down the empire, but leaves a rather mixed up prodigy-anti-hero behind to carry the torch. It would be kind of cool just to have a bunch of Sith sitting around in Dark Council pondering a propecy and the "Mystery Of The Jedi" (wait, didn't we kill all of them in a war thousands of years ago?). :)
 

Tanis

The Last Albino
Aug 30, 2010
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I'd like the idea of planing a nine trilogy movie series.

EP1/2/3 "focus" on Annie Skywalker.
IE: The FALL of The Republic.

EP4/5/6 "focus" on Luke Skywalker.
IE: The fall of the Empire.

EP7/8/9 "focus" on Jaina/Jacen Solo.
IE: The rise of the New Republic.

You could even do EO10/11/12 that "focus" on Anakin Solo:
IE: The Yuuzhan Vong War
 

Phlakes

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Mar 25, 2010
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...I'd actually be really interested in that.

The movie is really, really 70s, and pretty much made of cliches (even though it created a lot of them) by modern standards. The universe has also been expanded so fucking much since it came out that I'd love to see it in more depth.

I mean, as good as it is, it's not really a deep movie in any way. Most of the complexity came in Empire. Hell, it might even work to deconstruct it somehow.

But most likely whoever would handle it would do a terrible job and everyone would hate it. Although everyone would hate it even if it was good because internet.
 

matrix3509

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Sep 24, 2008
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Did we suddenly learn how to properly choreograph lightsaber duels while I wasn't looking? Sorry Bob, the lightsaber duels of the prequels were among the MOST impotent things in those movies. And when you are talking about movies as sterile as the prequels, something that STANDS OUT as especially impotent is really saying something.

The duels in the original trilogy were fucking amazing because they had emotion, gravitas, and meaning. The duels were used sparingly, and as such each had a overriding theme driving them. Most importantly, you knew WHY the duels were happening.

In the prequels the duels were meaningless, sterile, and fought in the crisp, clean, emotionless way no living being would ever fight, super-human reaction speed or no.
 

TeletubbiesGolfGun

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Sep 7, 2012
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while i wouldn't mind a remake, i would greatly prefer them to concentrate on another part of star wars

i've always been giddy at the thought of seeing the mandalorian wars..or something involving them, i fucking love their armor/lore/atmosphere..

FOR MANDALORE!!!!!!!!!
 

Aureliano

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Mar 5, 2009
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Luke kisses his sister, the first movie is basically one complete package that doesn't leave room for a real sequel, Han shot first, Alec Guinness was never originally intended to die (at the very least not the way that he did), and there was a ridiculous garbage tentacle monster.

These fundamental problems with the original movie are, in my opinion, a large part of what is so fascinating about it and its relationship with the trilogy. Political correctness has killed the capacity of Hollywood to have anything like these awesome aberrations (much in the way that the new Red Dawn simply cannot capture the stupidity of the original), so what do we have left? A Tron: Legacy-style remake. It wont be bad exactly, but it wont be good either. It certainly can't be groundbreaking.
 

maninahat

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Nov 8, 2007
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Basically, Star Wars is a culmination of action settings, shaped around an old fashioned, archetypal story and characters. So really, the sequels should basically run along the same lines, combining more genres. A New Hope had cowboys, nazis and Samurai. Why not do a remake with gangsters, cold war spies and wuxia?

There is a risk that it could come off as goofy, tongue-in-cheek Tarantino movie, but as long as it stays self-serious, it could easily work.

Also, I recommend keeping away from the original plot line. All three prequel movies seemed to served the sole purpose of showing what Vader and Obi Wan did before the original trilogy. It's the old (or rather, brand new) prequel mistake of exploring back story that needs no elaboration. back story is there to simply provide a sense of history to characters (so as to flesh them out) and create the impression this is a living breathing world which exists beyond a 100 minute period. That's it. Exploring unimportant stuff we already know enough about is boring and restrictive.

Finally - keep Jar Jar Binx, but write him well. Movies need a Jar Jar Binx. Jack Sparrow is basically a Jar Jar Binx character. R2-D2 and C-3PO are the Jar Jar Binxes of the originals. Don't exclude them.
 

disgruntledgamer

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Mar 6, 2012
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George Goofus remakes Star wars and implements new bad ideas everyone else but him knows is bad every time he re-releases it.

Don't give that idiot anymore bad ideas he comes up with enough on his own.
 

Oskuro

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Nov 18, 2009
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This needs to happen. Fan obsession has kept the Star Wars franchise stagnant for too long, and it needs a proper reboot and change of pace just like the new Trek movie.

The originals will still be there, and if the new version fails it can be rebooted again. Letting go of the past is the way to new interesting things in the future.

I personally grow weary of franchises that, despite having great potential, squander it by meandering on the same plot points, cliches and flawed continuity.

Have Vader not be Luke's father, have Leia be the protagonist, have Han be a black man and make Chewie an Ewok Jedi master. Have Ron Perlman play Jar Jar, Tobin Bell as Palpatine, and Hugh Laurie as Tarkin.
 

Jfswift

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Nov 2, 2009
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I'd be more interested in some new movies that take place after the events of the first six. Also, even if you remake it and it looks cool with new effects.. Who is going to replace Harrison Ford? He's kind of unique and well.. Was the guy for that time and place (to use a phrase from the opening of the big lebowski).