Mall Fight - Back To Basics (Open)

[Knife-28]

"I can." I say, before throwing several active bugbombs into the pets store. As the fumes fill the store, I light a match and chuck it in.

 

[Zepherus14]

I run to the back of the store, opening the back door as Knife throws the bug bombs. I then jump into a giant pile of clean Cat litter, there's a sign and everything. As the bug bombs explode, the cat litter absorbs the shockwave, and resists the flames.

"Now to make a 'clean' getaway!" I say as I slip out of the Cat litter.

 

[Zepherus14]

"Which one?" I manage to whisper as Eric pins me to the ground.

 

[Zepherus14]

"Stop it, your words are crushing me!!" I scream as Eric's puns pin me to the ground. =P

 

[Averant]

I spawn in a hardware store and grab a garden hose. Rushing out to Zeph and Eric, I wrap it around both of their necks and start choking them. Zeph for the puns, Eric because it's Eric.

 

[Zepherus14]

"...[sub]jimmy...help![/sub]..." I manage to gasp.

A small little rat scampers from one of the back backrooms and starts to gnaw at the hose.

 

[Averant]

Stops choking for a moment. "You have a rat named Jimmy?" I ask, raising an eyebrow.

 

[Zepherus14]

"I do now I guess, there is always at least animal in existence named 'Jimmy' that is awesome." I say.

 

[Knife-28]

I beat Averant over the head with a cricket bat, freeing Eric and Zeph from their choaking situation. I then beat them over the head with the cricket bat.

 

[Averant]

"Whark." I reply as my head breaks open.

I respawn in a sports shop, grab a cricket bat like knife, and a length of fishing line. I tie the fishing line to the handle of the cricket bat and rush out of the store, swinging it around my head as I aim for Knife.

"BAT AND WIRE!"[footnote]In replacement of ball and chain[/footnote] I yell as I swing.

Captcha: face to face.

Good to know captcha understands Mallfight.

 

[Zepherus14]

I respawn, and go to a marble slab icecream store, and get some mint chocolate chip icecream with M&Ms

 

[Knife-28]

I also go to Marble Slab ice-cream store, and get a chocolate fudge all the flavors, all of them. The resulting ice-cream cone stretches into the sky.

 

[Zepherus14]

I grab Knife's icecream and shove it down his throat. The resulting brainfreeze kills him.

 

[Averant]

I respawn in a laundromat, grab some stain remover, pour it on Eric and use his face to remove my death stain.

 

[Knife-28]

I also respawn inside the laundromat, except inside one of the washing machine. Unable to open it from the inside, I opt to tumble around in it.

 

[Knife-28]

Eric is crushed, one, because I am ROLLING around in the washing machine, and two, because of this poor grasp of said rolling washing Mashona crushing.

 

[Knife-28]

I continue to roll around, crashing throught the front 'Wee!' and crushing Eric, again.

 

[Averant]

I run back to the laundromat and get in a washing machine. Turning it on, I yell "JOUSTING MATCH!" and get inside. I tumble full speed towards knife. And then tumble full speed past knife because I have no way to steer this damn thing.

But it's ok, because Eric is in my path anyway. Stay still, Eric.

 

[Knife-28]

Unable to see where I'm actually going, I tumble into the fountain, and sink to the bottom. Unfortulently, because the washing machine is air tight, suffer a painful death from lack of oxygen.

 

[Knife-28]

I tackle Eric, and we both get crushed by Averant's washing machine.