Mall Fight RP: (CLOSED) (FINISHED)

[Saltarius]

"...Beat obvious crush to death with phallus. Still ask why."

 

[Paddy the Second]

"Because I have no other method of communicating my emotions to people anymore."

 

[Saltarius]

"You need fuckbuddy real bad. This coming from me, fucks sake."

 

[Paddy the Second]

"Let's run through my options: you don't want to, I don't want anyone else, and I never want to have sex with one of my own tulpas again."

 

[Saltarius]

"I make tulpa, tulpa fuck you, all happy."

 

[Paddy the Second]

"Why the fuck haven't you done this before?"

 

[Saltarius]

"Your sexual frustration help my sexual frustration."

 

[Paddy the Second]

"I'm a ghost! Sort of."

 

[Saltarius]

"Still sexually frustrated, Casper."

 

[Paddy the Second]

"That reference means nothing to me."

 

[Saltarius]

"Urgh. Just. One moment."

 

[ShindoL Shill]

I throw a cyborg penis at Paddy.
"I'm really prepared."

 

[Paddy the Second]

"Thank you based Trilby." The Paddybot installs the P3N15.

 

[Saltarius]

A tulpa of myself finally appears after twenty solid minutes of concentration.

"Long time love you me." It says.

 

[ShindoL Shill]

I go back to my workshop and start building a thing.

 

[Saltarius]

I follow Trilby back.

"Disgusting to think I have to technically be there while he does...that thing."

 

[ShindoL Shill]

"What thing?"
I continue thing-building.

 

[Paddy the Second]

"You took your time." Paddybot mocks Salt's weak psychic abilities.

 

[Saltarius]

"Want you have breast big? Ass large? Do can want you have." It gargles out in a static-y tone.

"Tulpa sex thing." I shudder violently.

 

[Paddy the Second]

"Nope. I can't do this."