Manly Non-Alcoholic Drinks

[TallanKhan]

Anything that isn't brigtly coloured and is served in a pint glass.

 

[Eddie the head]

screw the peoe who judge you. At least you can drive home at the end of the night. Drink Chocolate milk it is super delicious.

Fuck an A I love Chocolate milk.

 

[Dr Hammer]

A good cocktail is the blood of men you've slain in single combat mixed with motor oil and gun grease

 

[Starik20X6]

Coke is always socially acceptable. If you can handle a minuscule amount of alcohol a Lemon Lime and Bitters might suit.

All of the manliest men I know swear by their Ovaltine.

Ovaltine is indeed pretty hardcore.

Tabasco Sauce.

A gallon of it.

Manliest drink on earth.

I see your Tabasco Sauce and raise you Sriracha Rooster Sauce [http://theoatmeal.com/comics/sriracha].

 

[Okulossos]

Water, just plain, honest, clear water! is tastes like mountains, adventure and shark-wrestling!
Can't possibly get more manly then by drinking water! Everyone who thinks, that beer is more manly is just finding an excuse for nor being as manly as someone who drinks water!
"Be water, my friend"

 

[BarbaricGoose]

REAL men die of dehydration from not drinking anything.

So don't drink anything--be a man.

 

[Evil Smurf]

screw the peoe who judge you. At least you can drive home at the end of the night. Drink Chocolate milk it is super delicious.

Fuck an A I love Chocolate milk.

Man I love you, you like good music, drinks and other things

So what did you drink OP?

 

[Arakasi]

Order one, hold your head high, down it like a boss, and feel proud.

 

[Hagi]

Drink grapefruit juice with a straight face.

There is nothing manlier.

 

[Calibanbutcher]

Did anyone say Coffee yet?
Because coffee is certainly the manly drink of choice.

 

[Burnhardt]

So, I've never been a drinker but all my friends are. In the event that I'm dragged to a bar, what do you think I can order without hanging my head in shame?

The only people that would give a damn aren't worth knowing, so drink whatever you want.

If anybody does point and laugh just say its your turn as the designated driver.

 

[MeChaNiZ3D]

Shark eye fluid. It's not so much manly in the consumption as the harvesting.

 

[Strid]

Anything filled to the brim with meat and razorblades.

 

[Lady Larunai]

Id be more concerned about your fear of looking unmanly than being the "sober one"

 

[Mister K]

Juice. Why? Because it is basically blood of the fruit, gained by squizing it's flesh untill it's dry. If it's not manly, then I don't know what is.

 

[Ytomyth]

If it's not alcohol it has to contain some other poison, just to make sure everyone knows how BUTCH you are etc.

Mayhap some disinfection fluid? Just don't take the flowery one....

 

[Girl With One Eye]

I don't drink but if I go out with my friends I have an energy drink like red bull and no one says anything.

 

[Lt._nefarious]

Milk


[sub] go to about 30 seconds[/sub]

Anyway, why not just drink coke? If you down it fast enough it burns your throat so you could show of the awesome power of your iron throat... Or, if you can get it, Firey Irn-Bru, now that is a man drink...

 

[Trippy Turtle]

Don't go out! Its dangerous out there. Stay inside and play video games, the true men are currently running around as monk pandas.

In the case you get kidnapped by the CIA and forced into a dangerous outing with your friends than just drink whatever you like the taste of.
Is they say something you have three options.
Tell them the truth: You are being watched by the CIA and must stay sober in order to defend yourself and them.
Play it off: You don't want to get drunk and take home all the hot girls by accident.
Not give a fuck: Tell them you like whatever drink it is and you will damn well enjoy it.

 

[freaper]

So, I've never been a drinker but all my friends are. In the event that I'm dragged to a bar, what do you think I can order without hanging my head in shame?

H2O is still pretty reliable, I hear. You can even tell them it's vodka.

Just pull a face after every chug and smack the glass down on the table afterwards. That'll fool everyone.