Manly Non-Alcoholic Drinks

[Twilight_guy]

Ha, the most manly drink of all is non-alcoholic: Battery acid. Only real men drink that. Or you could go for a girly glass of motor oil (pussy).

Actually get anything and say that you're a designated driver (if you're the only sober one then its true, even if you don't have a car). People respect that.

 

[Hazy]

All of the manliest men I know swear by their Ovaltine.

[HEADING=2]I'm Ralph Parker, and I approve this message[/HEADING]

 

[rosac]

I go for water or, when having to be in charge of a sport night out, red bull. It keeps me going, and lets me get hyped enough to show the wasted freshers how to have a PROPER night out. Whilst sober.

(I'm seen as a bad joke, I'm not allowed to drink, yet I'm a social secretary for a sports team and work in the bar/club promotion business. Fun fun.)

 

[Zakarath]

Shot in the Dark. Coffee with added espresso in it.

I'll see your silly espressos and raise you a Black Blood of the Earth.
http://www.funraniumlabs.com/how-to-consume/

 

[SuperSuperSuperGuy]

Anything.

If the people you're spending time with are going to judge you for not drinking alcohol, you should seriously think about spending time with other people. Same goes for if they're going to judge you if your drink isn't manly enough for them. You should be able to drink whatever the heck you like and not get harassed for it. Hold your head high, and don't be ashamed to say that you don't like alcohol. The trick to being manly is to not be concerned about being manly.

For the record, I like Root Beer, tea and coffee. Ginger Ale (also Ginger Beer), chocolate milk, hot cocoa and any form of milkshake are also really good choices, though you can't go wrong with some water.

 

[lacktheknack]

Pansy. You walk up to that bartender, look him/her/it directly in the eye, and order that chocolate milk like a MAN.

 

[___________________]

Milk. And if someone laughs at you go over and kick his ass.

 

[guitarsniper]

Shot in the Dark. Coffee with added espresso in it.

I'll see your silly espressos and raise you a Black Blood of the Earth.
http://www.funraniumlabs.com/how-to-consume/

THAT
IS
AWESOME

 

[OldNewNewOld]

The manliest man don't drink alcohol because they don't need it to make their life easier and to relax. They can do it without such... drinks.

But seriously, if they judge you for not drinking alcohol, then find other friends. If they don't judge you, there is no reason to ask for a "manly" dink. Order a glass of milk and tell them to suck it up because manly man don't care whether someone judges them.

 

[Mr.PlanetEater]

Want to be a man while still staying sober? Well all you have to do is walk up to the bar, look the bartender right in the eye, put on some sunglasses, comb your manly mustache, slam down a Porterhouse steak, and demand he blend it for you on the spot.

Bonus man points if you augment this man-lixer with a full-rack of ribs and a thimble full of shark blood.

CAPTCHA: Do you love me?

No Captcha, I do not love you for man/machine love is forbidden.

 

[GamemasterAnthony]

Shot in the Dark. Coffee with added espresso in it.

I'll see your silly espressos and raise you a Black Blood of the Earth.
http://www.funraniumlabs.com/how-to-consume/

Ladies and Bruces, I think we have a winner!

Damn...now I want to get that!

 

[Mr.Mattress]

You wanna know what the manliest drink is?

None other, then WATER!

Water is so manly, that it keeps you alive!

Not many drinks can say that.

In fact, water is so manly, it makes up about 80%, of all Man!

Since man is 80% water, water must be 80% Manly!

Water! Manliest Drink, Ever!

 

[IamLEAM1983]

Did anyone say Coffee yet?
Because coffee is certainly the manly drink of choice.

No.

This is:

Can we tie them, I enjoy them both and they're doing wonders for my chest hairs.

They're also doing wonders for how dehydrated I feel and for the regular Horton's migraines I'm stuck with.

I kid, I kid.

However...

You wanna know what the manliest drink is?

None other, then WATER!

Water is so manly, that it keeps you alive!

Not many drinks can say that.

In fact, water is so manly, it makes up about 80%, of all Man!

Since man is 80% water, water must be 80% Manly!

Water! Manliest Drink, Ever!

The logic. It is irrefutable.

 

[C F]

Hot Cocoa. If that doesn't sound manly to you, you didn't make it hot enough.

Especially the way I make it.

<img src="http://www.gourmetsleuth.com/images/unsweetened_cocoa.jpg" width="200" /img>

See this stuff? It's baking cocoa.
No sugar, no added anything; you look at the ingredients list, it's just straight-up "Cocoa".

I mix that into hot water. It could not be any simpler, any more direct, any more raw.
I mean, that's the way the Aztecs did it, right?

Man's drink, right here.

 

[DoomyMcDoom]

Tea if they have it, water if they don't, a real man drinks his liquid hot and classy, or cold and pure, nothing less.

 

[Olas]

A shotglass of Bhut Jolokia (Ghost Pepper) hot sauce. If you can drink that and survive you're officially the manliest thing on the planet.

(Don't actually try this, you really could die from it or permanently ruin your mouth and digestive system. This stuff is practically acid)

 

[Auberon]

Look for none other than Jeremy Clarkson's Manly smoothie! Drink that down, and most things don't compare.

 

[Zack Alklazaris]

If you need to stay sober, drink Root Beer and drink it like a man. It's all about how you carry yourself.

This root beer is real nice, and many people think its a beer because of the bottle.

Honestly, just hold yourself high. Also remember there is non-alcoholic beer if you feel that self conscious.