Alright then, this is the thread for all kinds of maths and science related jokes, whether they're the kind that you'll only get if you've got a PHD in the subject or ones making fun of scientists or just any general jokes relating to maths or science. (Also, if this thread gets popular enough then I'll update this post with all the best ones.)
Here are mine:
Two electrons are sitting on a bench, a third electron comes over and says "Can I join you?"
The other electrons reply "Don't be ridiculous, we're not Bosons."
Q: Why did the cat fall of the roof?
A: Because his mu was too low.
Entropy isn't what it used to be...
A mathematician and a regular guy are on a long road trip and they pass a field full of cows. The regular guy, rather bored, casually remarks "Lotta cows in that field."
The mathematician glances over and says "Yeah, 83 to be precise."
"How the hell do you know that?" exclaims the regular guy.
The mathematician replies "Easy, I just counted the legs and divided by four."
A biologist, a physicist and a chemist are standing on a beach looking out onto the sea. The biologist remarks "I bet theres all sorts of unusual species of seaweed here, I must examine them to further my research." He then walks into the ocean and is swept away by the current and drowns. The physicist then says "Isn't the superposition of these waves just incredible, I must take a closer look" He then walks into the ocean and is also swept away by the current and drowns. The chemist stands there for a long time and then, taking out his notebook, he carefully made the observation "Both the biologist and the physicist are soluable in salt water".
You can time how long it takes between seeing the lightning strike and hearing the thunder. If you multiply this time by the speed of sound then you can tell how far away it struck. If you don't hear the thunder then you got hit, so never mind.
Find dy if y = (r^3)/3
And finally: Did you hear the one about the constipated mathematician? He had to work it out with a pencil.
Here are mine:
Two electrons are sitting on a bench, a third electron comes over and says "Can I join you?"
The other electrons reply "Don't be ridiculous, we're not Bosons."
Q: Why did the cat fall of the roof?
A: Because his mu was too low.
Entropy isn't what it used to be...
A mathematician and a regular guy are on a long road trip and they pass a field full of cows. The regular guy, rather bored, casually remarks "Lotta cows in that field."
The mathematician glances over and says "Yeah, 83 to be precise."
"How the hell do you know that?" exclaims the regular guy.
The mathematician replies "Easy, I just counted the legs and divided by four."
A biologist, a physicist and a chemist are standing on a beach looking out onto the sea. The biologist remarks "I bet theres all sorts of unusual species of seaweed here, I must examine them to further my research." He then walks into the ocean and is swept away by the current and drowns. The physicist then says "Isn't the superposition of these waves just incredible, I must take a closer look" He then walks into the ocean and is also swept away by the current and drowns. The chemist stands there for a long time and then, taking out his notebook, he carefully made the observation "Both the biologist and the physicist are soluable in salt water".
You can time how long it takes between seeing the lightning strike and hearing the thunder. If you multiply this time by the speed of sound then you can tell how far away it struck. If you don't hear the thunder then you got hit, so never mind.
Find dy if y = (r^3)/3
And finally: Did you hear the one about the constipated mathematician? He had to work it out with a pencil.
