this one's even better. A dad challenges his college age daughter's teacher to a religious debate to prevent her from turning to the dark side and being seduced by the evils of science!Akichi Daikashima said:
Most intellectually insulting movies you can think of
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As a Christian, I hate movies like these. They're a dime a dozen, poorly written, poorly acted, have horrible stories, and do nothing to advance the faith. Yet my parents can't seem to get enough of them. And I get it, if the world is getting you down and you want a safe movie to watch where bad things are happening to good people but you know that they will percevere and all will be right in the end, then yes, these movies will get the job done. But so will most sports movies, and they have at least some production value.Akichi Daikashima said:
Double Jeopardy. On the Waterfront turned an Arther Miller script into an apology for testifying before the HUAC. Crash 2004 is incredible racist for an anti-racist movie. Black Hawk Down changed the name of a child rapist on behalf of the Pentagon. Enemy at the Gates was specifically written by Pentagon to excuse civilian deaths. Red Dawns are incredible fucked up. Birth of a Nation is "history written in bullshit." Man of Steel was about an ubermench not Superman (or maybe it was about Stardust the Super Wizard). Olympus has Fallen is racist and fascist.
I actually liked Prometheus. I think it was about ambiguity which really pissed a lot fans off.
I actually liked Prometheus. I think it was about ambiguity which really pissed a lot fans off.
TheGuitarmasterx7 said:
But for some reason, they already assume you are a conservative, stubborn, Christian, in which case, I think it's best that I leave both of them alone, since they clearly only want "Wun und precisely Wun" type of person to watch them.
I hear you.themyrmidon said:
If there is one thing I dislike about those movies is that its harmful to both theists and atheists: the latter become more smug(and in accordance to the frequency of release of such movies) and refuse to watch anything relating to Christianity, even if it isn't political like Noah, and for theists, it is really, really patronising and borderline offensive in the way they just present religion as just "oh, well you should believe because reasons".
The biggest problem I have with "Faith-based" movies like this is that it makes actual genuine Christians like myself and also now you look like absolute tools. The sniper in Saving Private Ryan who was blowing away every hostile Kraut who crossed his line of sight while also quoting scripture - THAT. More that, less whiny semi-inspirational BS. Christians need to be the guys that you can always count on to have your back, not the guys that you make excuses to get away from before they whine at you.themyrmidon said:
Oh please. You amateurs. If you REALLY want your intellect insulted...YOU HAVE TO GO DEEPER!
I present to you...INNOCENCE OF MUSLIMS! A film so bad that President Obama asked Youtube to take it off their site! I have said before, and I maintain, that this may be the worst thing ever made by a man.
In fact, I wrote a breif review of it a couple of years ago. It's here [http://www.escapistmagazine.com/forums/read/326.389469-Has-anyone-reviewed-Innocence-of-Muslims-yet-No-Well-Im-gonna], if you're interested. Everything I have to say is there.
I present to you...INNOCENCE OF MUSLIMS! A film so bad that President Obama asked Youtube to take it off their site! I have said before, and I maintain, that this may be the worst thing ever made by a man.
In fact, I wrote a breif review of it a couple of years ago. It's here [http://www.escapistmagazine.com/forums/read/326.389469-Has-anyone-reviewed-Innocence-of-Muslims-yet-No-Well-Im-gonna], if you're interested. Everything I have to say is there.
Not so much an insult to the intelligence, but an insult nonetheless was A Beautiful Mind. Based on a true story where the guy in question was gay, but was conveniently made straight cuz of... I don't know - I thought the Oscars dug gay people in movies.
And I may get some hate for this, but The Green Mile. All of Frank Darabont's movies really, but The Green Mile in particular. It's just so emotionally manipulating, with evil characters that are so stupidly, snively, disgustingly evil it's fucking ludicrous. I could just feel the movie bashing me on the head with a lead pipe screaming "DO YOU HATE THIS GUY YET, CUZ HE'S EVIL?"
Also Sucker Punch. No, you're not clever or thought provoking, you're dumb. And not even fun dumb, just boring dumb.
And I may get some hate for this, but The Green Mile. All of Frank Darabont's movies really, but The Green Mile in particular. It's just so emotionally manipulating, with evil characters that are so stupidly, snively, disgustingly evil it's fucking ludicrous. I could just feel the movie bashing me on the head with a lead pipe screaming "DO YOU HATE THIS GUY YET, CUZ HE'S EVIL?"
Also Sucker Punch. No, you're not clever or thought provoking, you're dumb. And not even fun dumb, just boring dumb.
Avatar, Full Stop.
Seriously, this movie one of the WORST pieces of cinematic garbage to ever may wayyyy more money than it should be allowed to in a sane and rational universe. Avatar sucks and, if a person I know likes it, they are a worse person in my eyes for having liked it.
Let me delve into the reasons why. The plot is insulting, the bad guys are CARTOONISH caricatures who would make Cobra Commander look balanced and worst of all isn't just that the movie is bad, it's Insidious. The central theme of "Technology is Bad and Nature is God" is taken so far that the audience is un-ironically presented with the idea that the ENTIRE Human race, every man, woman and child are all evil because of what we've done to the planet and we all deserve to die. And they bought it; Hook, line and Sinker.
Don't believe me? Go back and watch that ending over again, that is literally what is happening and it is literally the central message of the film.
So not only is Avatar a horrible, horrible movie, it's also one of the slimiest propaganda pieces I have ever seen. This crap is right up there with Jude Suss.
It is often said that people were distracted by all the pretty CGI and didn't really grasp the film's central themes, but I would rebut with the fact that is how Propaganda works. They draw you in with pretty imagery and a simple, easy to follow story. You will then start to internalize the message of the film without even realizing it. Seriously, go back and watch Jew Suss and you'll see this happening. You'll catch yourself rooting for the film's heroes even though they are vicious anti-Semites written by Nazis.
Seriously, this movie one of the WORST pieces of cinematic garbage to ever may wayyyy more money than it should be allowed to in a sane and rational universe. Avatar sucks and, if a person I know likes it, they are a worse person in my eyes for having liked it.
Let me delve into the reasons why. The plot is insulting, the bad guys are CARTOONISH caricatures who would make Cobra Commander look balanced and worst of all isn't just that the movie is bad, it's Insidious. The central theme of "Technology is Bad and Nature is God" is taken so far that the audience is un-ironically presented with the idea that the ENTIRE Human race, every man, woman and child are all evil because of what we've done to the planet and we all deserve to die. And they bought it; Hook, line and Sinker.
Don't believe me? Go back and watch that ending over again, that is literally what is happening and it is literally the central message of the film.
So not only is Avatar a horrible, horrible movie, it's also one of the slimiest propaganda pieces I have ever seen. This crap is right up there with Jude Suss.
It is often said that people were distracted by all the pretty CGI and didn't really grasp the film's central themes, but I would rebut with the fact that is how Propaganda works. They draw you in with pretty imagery and a simple, easy to follow story. You will then start to internalize the message of the film without even realizing it. Seriously, go back and watch Jew Suss and you'll see this happening. You'll catch yourself rooting for the film's heroes even though they are vicious anti-Semites written by Nazis.
That's oversimplifying things quite a bit. For starters, Nash is, at most, bisexual, he married and divorced a woman, and then they remarried in 2001 and are still together. He also fathered a son with another woman.Casual Shinji said:
It's also worth noting that both he and his wife deny any of the alleged homosexual experiences that he supposedly had, so it's not like he's been with this same male partner all his life and Hollywood just magically transformed him into Jennifer Connelly for movie purposes.
Agreed, I absolutely despised Avatar. It was one of those movies where I was cheering for the bad guys to win, because the good guys were so obnoxious and the movie kept beating you over the head with its message.Torque2100 said:
Closest I can think of is Man of Steel, with its relentless Jesus analogies.
Avatar, ?cos people destroying the environment are baaaaad.
Avatar, ?cos people destroying the environment are baaaaad.
Iris Alba, the Ice Queen, and an accordion.Michael Law said:This. Except the sex scene, since that is how she become "pregnant" with the proto-facehugger. Kind of important.Shoggoth2588 said:Prometheus. Prometheus was just the stupidest thing...I feel like Prometheus was made in Invader Zim's universe and somehow tumbled into our reality...First off, why would Weyland make this mission a secret mission? Sending people to the first Earth-Like planet in human history would be HUGE freaking news and ya know what, Weyland is a HUGE corporation. It would be like Microsoft or Apple making a true AI and NOT shouting about it from the rooftops within the first week.
Next you have the whole exploration process...The planet may be Earth-like but you still don't know anything about the planet or its composition. There were geologists on-board the vessel who would have INSISTED that nobody go outside of an X-Meter radius of the ship until soil samples have been taken and tested. Take Luna for example: You wouldn't know it by looking but the dust/dirt/etc on the surface is similar to broken glass and capable of ripping through thin fabrics. If that were to happen on an alien world, you would be absolutely fucked. Biologists would have also wanted to take soil samples because since LV-223 is Earthlike there's a good chance of finding microbial life...which could ALSO royally fuck up an unprotected human. What's more, everyone knew that a storm was coming. You do not go out and explore an alien world (or moon) when you know a storm is coming. You can leave the ship and dig up some dirt but you do not get in a Mako and drive around when you know next to nothing about this planet's weather patterns.
Speaking of an alien atmosphere:
WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK!? The air could be potentially breathable yes, but you don't know what kind of microbes are IN the air! And you all took off your helmets after someone else did...why not keep an eye on that person, test that person once you get back to the ship etc...let his dumb ass be the lab rat but don't follow his example...speaking of utter stupidity:
It looks like a penis, a vagina, a snake...and it's aggressively hissing at you. It's made itself look larger, which is another clear sign that it wants you to back the fuck off...so of course that's your cue to poke it in the face like a jack ass. A Biologist should know what an animal looks and, acts like when it wants you to leave it the fuck alone. I realize it is the first alien we've encountered at this point and that's exciting but you do NOT poke it in the face you fucking idiot!
.
Unless there was another scene I just don't remember....?
Transformers and Transformers 2. Every single human character in these movies, virtually without exception, is an open insult to humanity. Every one. From fascist caricatures to stupid stereotypes to just pure unadulterated stupid. If you take the giant robots out of the movie and just watch the people scenes you would either kill yourself or go on a murderous rampage with a popcorn bucket and a packet of twizzlers before the credits roll.
Avatar would be number 2 on my list. Gorgeous stunning special effects cover up what has to be the dumbest most idiotic regurgitation of Dances with Wolves ever. Stupid stupid stupid!
Avatar would be number 2 on my list. Gorgeous stunning special effects cover up what has to be the dumbest most idiotic regurgitation of Dances with Wolves ever. Stupid stupid stupid!
I've only just seen it, but the new Godzilla was quite bad in this regard as well.
Not only was the movie boring as hell, misleadingly marketed (Bryan Cranston was in it for like 30 fucking minutes before getting axed off!) and boringly written, it also had tons of really dumb moments they tried to pass off as serious. Aaron Taylor-Johnson literally pointing a pistol at a monster the size of a skyscraper, people not noticing gigantic monsters time and time again and a FUCKING NUKE GOING OFF JUST NEXT TO SAN FRANCISCO WITH SEEMINGLY NO EFFECT!!!! were just some. This movie is the new king of the "dumbest moment of a nuke going off next to a major city" ranking, knocking The Dark Knight Rises off the top spot.
It's not good, it's boring, and I don't recommend seeing it.
It's not good, it's boring, and I don't recommend seeing it.
Speaking of Godzilla, let's not forget to put the 1998 Roland Emmerich abomination on this list. Much like transformers every single human character was some sort of sub human moron. Every spoken line was awful. And horrible horrible monster. Actually we can probably add all of Roland's movies to this list. At least Independence Day was kind of self aware of its own stupidity and ran with it for fun and amusement. But the others? Day after Tomorrow? 2012? Dear gods somebody get the man help. And a writer. And a therapist. And for the love of god stop giving him money.
If we can include the marketing leading up to a movie, there's Star Trek: Into Darkness. It's not Khan, it's not Khan, it's totally not Khan!
It was Khan
I'm just gunna throw Sharknado out at this point.
I wasn't expecting it too be good when I watched it, nor did I expect anything more than a B-movie type of film. The film was just so insulting, such as when:
Like I said, I expected it too be bad so I'm not surprised or "mad" at the movie, but it still is the most intellectually insulting movie I saw.
I wasn't expecting it too be good when I watched it, nor did I expect anything more than a B-movie type of film. The film was just so insulting, such as when:
We are expected to believe that; two people are both swallowed whole by the same shark, neither are bitten or anything, and one just so happened to have a chainsaw when they were swallowed and so they use it to cut themselves out of the shark and save them both.
Then there is the cutting between cg sharks swimming in the flooded streets to sharks that are clearly swimming in much more water than it would be possible for them to be in if they were in streets.
Also, if the hurricane is strong enough to lift sharks out of the water and swirl them around, how come the sharks don't die from being out of the water (dehydration, asphyxiation et.) and how come there are no other types of marine life too be seen? Surely cetaceans and other fish would also be picked up if this thing was so strong.
There is more dumb stuff in the film, but I won't list everything.
Then there is the cutting between cg sharks swimming in the flooded streets to sharks that are clearly swimming in much more water than it would be possible for them to be in if they were in streets.
Also, if the hurricane is strong enough to lift sharks out of the water and swirl them around, how come the sharks don't die from being out of the water (dehydration, asphyxiation et.) and how come there are no other types of marine life too be seen? Surely cetaceans and other fish would also be picked up if this thing was so strong.
There is more dumb stuff in the film, but I won't list everything.
Like I said, I expected it too be bad so I'm not surprised or "mad" at the movie, but it still is the most intellectually insulting movie I saw.
I have to assume you didn't have much knowledge of the type of movie it represents going in, because otherwise you'd have known that Sharknado isn't in the same cast with movies like Machete or Hobo With a Shotgun. It's not supposed to be a spoof, pastiche of or an homage to dumb films, it just is a dumb film. It's in the realm of Mega Piranha, Sharktopus or Mega Shark vs. Giant Octopus: deliberately awful movies that know they're awful, but instead of having fun with it, they try to see how far they can get away with it. It was produced by Asylum [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Asylum], the supreme rulers of crap distribution in the modern age.Dryzdale said: