Most stupid personal question you've been asked?

Kitty4President

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Nov 22, 2011
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Not personal, but once in my Astronomy class we had to get into pairs to work on a task about stars. As we're working, my partner randomly asks me if stars had bones. No, really.

OT: I also once got asked why I played video games, as the violence will surely turn me into a serial killer who's planning the next High School massacre. Funnily enough, the one who asked me had never played one game. Ever.
 

guidance

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Dec 9, 2010
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Al-Bundy-da-G said:
guidance said:
"Do you speak Jew?"

That wasn't even one person one time. Who is going around telling people Jewish is a language?
Maybe they meant Yiddish, but didn't know the actual name?
They usually mean Hebrew, but for some reason know it as speaking Jewish.
 

Dogstile

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Jan 17, 2009
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Camaranth said:
"You're not local, are you?"
Oh god. I plan on moving over to America at some point and i'm going to hate that question, alongside with "you're British, aren't you?"

Currently, I just get an "are you really Irish" when I speak with the accent. Yes, I can do the stereotypical leprechaun, but you guys just heard me speak normally five minutes ago, dear lord are you that dull?
 

Monochrome

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Dec 7, 2010
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It would have to be "What´s your name again?"
So my real name is Garcia Tavares Antonio, typical portuguese names. Except it´s reversed.
For perspective, it´s kinda like being called "Doe John". So when introducing myself I always say "Garcia, pleased blah blah courtesy blah...". Sometimes they ask me immediately if that is my first name, and I really do appreciate that so we get that outta the way. Other times, they ask me after a very long time. On my finals, this kid, whom has spent 3 years under the same building as I(not to mention other hangouts), is on the same room doing the exam (Room E to H) and tells me "Wrong room mate, you´re supposed to be in the A to D group".

But the most stupid and annoying thing isn´t the questions, lack of attention, auditory acuity or the stupid look in their faces. It´s the whole process of dealing with another human being that wishes to know your identity in order to fill out forms or any other bureaucracy. Those interactions always tend to be a bit like this:

Full name please.
Garcia Tavares António.
So that is "António Garcia Tavares" or "António Tavares Garcia"?
Garcia Tavares António.
Really?
Yes!
Ok. We just need this information in case someone has a similar name.


Normally I answer that bullshit excuse from their lack of common sense and hearing by replying: I have no first-borns yet. And even after his birth I doubt he will share my first name.
 

bat32391

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Oct 19, 2011
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Well I was talking about dinosaurs with my friend then this one women walks up and asks me

"Are you really that stupid? Dinosaurs never existed! Only an idiot would believe that. Everyone should know that Satan put those fake bones to steer the faithful off the true path of god."

And I swear I am not making this shit up.
 

I Have No Idea

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Aug 5, 2011
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Al-Bundy-da-G said:
OT: I'm up there with the "Why don't you believe in God?" crowd.
That doesn't always have to be a stupid question. Some people could be genuinely curious, but I assume that's not the case for you and they're just being jerks about it?
 

Mouse One

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Jan 22, 2011
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Heh. Drive commuter aircraft sometimes if you want dumb questions. Yes, they're smaller than the big jets. You don't have to point that out, I figured it out when I looked at my paycheck.

"Are these things safe?"
--no, ma'am, but what with my girlfriend leaving me, I just don't find life worth living anymore

"I heard the weather's bad, will we get in?"
--If I knew that, I could save the company a few million dollars a month. How about we fly over there and see if the weather guessers are right for a change?

"How long have you been flying?"
--Since about 6am Pacific Standard time. (Honest answer, I've got more flight time than my squadron skipper did when I was in the Navy. But you wouldn't believe that, would you?)

"Have you been drinking?"
--I wish
 

Dangit2019

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Aug 8, 2011
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-cracks knuckles-

"Do you ride horses to school?" (I live in a Texan town with 100,000 people in it. Needless to say, we have cars)

"No offence or anything, but are you 'special'?" (Saying 'no offence' does no allow you to openly assume I'm mentally impaired)

"Are you gay?" (I've never been especially effeminate and I've dated girls very openly)
 

Dangit2019

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renegade7 said:
When a girl asks "What are you thinking about?"

Infuriating. What am I supposed to say? What I'm actually thinking about (Breasts, spaceships, etc.)?
I usually say the most out-there nonsense that I can think of so they'll learn not to ask me such questions. For example:

"What are you thinking?"

"I was wondering what would happen if you combined the cast of Mystery Science Theater with the Microsoft landing gear."

It doesn't work if they're geeky of the sorts though, because then they can tell that you're talking out of your arse.
 

JimB

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Apr 1, 2012
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This one requires a bit of setup.

So I'm having this conversation about feminism--well, not so much having it as I am sitting there quietly because I always feel ashamed of my ignorance when discussing feminism, which makes me shy--when this guy starts going off on a bizarre, completely unprompted tangent about how only idiots would ever say rape is the worst thing that can happen to a person. I feel confident enough to say something back like, "Each person has the right to decide for himself what fate sounds like the worst possible thing to him." Apparently taking this as an affront, the guy asks me in a challenging tone,

"Have you ever been raped?"

Because I cannot have an opinion on rape unless I can prove to a stranger in a public setting that I have been a victim of it.

The rest of the conversation did not go well for him.
 

Bat Vader

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I was once asked how it felt having arthritis in both my knees. Let me just say it doesn't feel all that good.
 

Techsmart07

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My favorite is "Are you Amish?"
... Yes... I'm totally Amish (pulls out smartphone to check calls while on laptop writing software for my CS degree, showing pictures of things that would make a real Amish person cringe)...

I'm in Georgia. We have rednecks and gangsters, not Amish.
 

Prime_Hunter_H01

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Dec 20, 2011
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Infernai said:
"Do you Australians ride kangaroo's to school?"

Yes, another fully grown human being legitimately asked me that..i was too in awe of the stupidity to actually do anything.
That reminds me of a friend from high school. He moved here from Alaska.

He was sincerely asked, "Do they ride polar bears in Alaska" and "What language do they speak in Alaska

His response to the first one was "I used to but my polar bear died."
From then on it was an in-joke in my class that he had trained with the Alaskan Polar Bear Army.
 

QuantumT

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Nov 17, 2009
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Monochrome said:
Out of curiosity, in Portugal do they use your first name to separate you into groups as opposed to your last name? In the US, assuming your name was John Doe, you would be put into the A-D group as opposed to the E-H group, because last name is almost always the one used to do something like that.

PS- Sorry if this comes across as horribly ignorant or if I'm simply misreading your post.
 

Nathan Crumpler

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Sep 1, 2011
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When people find out I don't like being touched, I get an odd question from time to time.

"Were you molested as a child?"

No, but if I had been, I would have no problem talking about it with a person who I have met yesterday.

Some times I wonder if these people have actually met enough molestation victims to come to the conclusion that not wanting to be touched is a side effect of previous abuse.
 

darlarosa

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May 4, 2011
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"Why do you speak white?"

"Why don't you draw black people" (I rarely ever color in or shade my drawings)

"Why are all your main characters black" in reference to my fiction. (never a "why are your main characters female though oddly enough(I do write white male, or asian main characters sometimes)

"Are you a lesbian" Asked because I'm 6"2, chubby, have a deep voice, and not trying to screw everything I see apparently
 

MeChaNiZ3D

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Aug 30, 2011
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"Why do you draw so much?" is probably the only one that hasn't already been said (I get the atheist ones too, no siblings though and no friends who would care if I gay or not [which are the best kind]). It just really pisses me off, because it's f***ing obvious that I love it so of course I'm going to do it all the time. Also, really not trying to brag, but it's generally asked by people who want to tell me that I'm good at it but have too much at stake so they take the stupider, less appreciative, somehow cooler option, which pisses me off in and of itself. I imagine people who go well in tests don't like it when they are asked "Why are you so smart for?" for much the same reasons.

OH OH and a lot of stupid questions about Australia, mainly from Japanese people. They only sound stupid to me though because I am Australian, to be fair, there's no way they could know that we have oranges in Australia and that kangaroos are not kept as pets and that crocodile is not eaten on a regular basis.
 

Dethenger

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Jul 27, 2011
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"Do you like penguins?"
Asked by some girl who sat in front of me in math class once. I never talked to her, nor anybody else in that class, did nothing to grab her attention. The question was, on top of being just fucking dumb, was pointlessly random and entirely unprovoked.

Rastien said:
First thing my sister asked me when she found me by the side of the road after being hit by a car.

"Are you okay?"

"FUNNILY ENOUGH NO!, CALL ME A BLOODY AMUBLANCE"

I was in alot of pain and on reflection she was probably really worried, but fuck me if at the i was angry as i was quite clearly not okay and needed medical attention xD.
Relevant George Carlin [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0IWx96qPtn8&feature=player_detailpage#t=113s]

(Skipped to relevant part, but you may wish to watch it all for proper context)
 

Voidrunner

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Feb 26, 2011
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There was this was this one time I was just walking along when a guy standing ahead of me who I had never even seen before remarked loudly to his friend, "that guy looks like Jew," then as I walked past he asked "can I have a dollar?", when I refused to give him any money he turned back to his friend and said "see, told you he was a Jew." Or maybe I just don't give random strangers money?

I also get "did you know your nose is broken?" quite a bit but that's more stupid than personal, even if I had somehow not felt it shattering at the time or seen the rivers of blood pouring from it I would know the moment I looked in a mirror.