North Korea Threatens War With US Over Seth Rogen Comedy

[Fsyco]

http://thediplomat.com/2014/06/no-north-korea-did-not-threaten-war-over-seth-rogan-movie/

So, evidently they didn't actually threaten to declare war. They just said that they're being victimized by the big bad evil US.

On the subject of North Korea, it seems like a bit of a tricky situation. It's an abysmal dictatorship that engages in serious human rights violations, but nobody wants it to fail because nobody wants to have to clean up the mess. It'd be ugly and time consuming and probably take years, if not decades, to make North Korea habitable and not full of crazies.

Like waking from a dream that you always thought was reality. Most North Koreans don't even have a semblance of a clue of what the outside world is like...I remember reading and watching stories about N. Koreans who escaped and were absolutely blown away of how we progressed, not to mention the culture shock. Most North Koreans are even aware what kind of hellhole they actually live in, but they are not waiting for someone to come save them, their hopes have already been shattered. Ashame to, from what I saw, N. Koreans are talented people and could contribute much to the world if they were given the chance. As i said before, I don't advocate war...but if North Korea decided to be dumb and try something, I would fully support the liberation of the N. Korean people...even if some of them may not think it that way.

So you're saying North Korea is the Matrix?

North Korea is like the Matrix, which in itself is a ripoff of Plato's cave. The basic idea goes that if you're trapped in a cave with your buddies, and all you ever see is shadows on the wall, you'll assume that's how reality works. But if you somehow get free and step outside the cave, and then come back in to tell your friends about it, they'll call you a loony because it goes against what they think is reality. The Matrix is basically a cyber-cave.

 

[Do4600]

North Korea has the fourth largest standing army in the world, with just over 1 million active duty personnel. They also have something like 10 million reservists. North Korea also outnumbers the South on tanks 3:1, SPGs 8:1, and AA guns 10:1.

That's a lot of '0' score reviews on Metacritic.

Those stats aren't exactly impressive, what they are armed with is the equivalent of muskets. Also if that army is anywhere but North Korea they would starve to death, or the farmers would starve to death producing food to feed them. Either way a conflict would be short because either the soldiers or the farmers would starve to death. Also the only reason the country exists is because China and the US didn't want to fight a war with each other, and China is now approving harsh sanctions against them. They can't stand stand against the world alone.

 

[Unia]

You know, if this was any other country I might side with them on this. Making a comedy about assassinating the contemporary leader of a country is kind of distasteful. But seeing as this is North Korea, they deserve every ounce of ridicule they get.

EDIT: Ooh, suppose "retaliation" means making a reversed situation comedy. Could they possibly out-cheese Rogen?!

 

[The Great JT]

Y'know what I just realized? I finally know who North Korea is. They're that pissant ruler in a game of Civilization that demands technology from you on threat of war, despite the fact you're up to modern-day infantry units and they're still making Pikemen.

 

[lacktheknack]

Those stats aren't exactly impressive, what they are armed with is the equivalent of muskets.

That's interesting. When I was there, they looked more like Chinese knock-offs of the AK-47. Must be pretty hard to muzzle load the most successful assault rifle in history.

Admit it: You find the notion to be very amusing.

I know I do.

"Cover me, I'm reloading!"

 

[lacktheknack]

You know what would be the funniest/most horrible thing? If this is how WWIII starts. Cause if we get into a war with North Korea there is a good chance it could snowball into a global conflict.

The beginning of the end is a Seth Rogen comedy. That is going to be really embarrassing when aliens study the charred ashes of our civilization.

Not gonna happen.

The only true friend N. Korea has in the world in China, and even China is getting less friendly as time goes on.

Apparently, China and S. Korea have $250B per year worth of trade going on, while China and N. Korea have about $6B per year. Also, the leader of S. Korea has been welcomed to Beijing, while Kim Jong-Un has not. If it spirals into war, China is assuredly going to side with S. Korea, and by extension, the rest of the world.

So... the entire damn world vs. North Korea. That's not much of a world war.

 

[lacktheknack]

The US is a bully and will always be a bully. Reparations are in order to the people of North Korea for this insulting movie by the US. Social Justice for all.

Thanks for the laugh man. You almost had me until you said "Social Justice for all" as if you meant it. :'D

 

[Korolev]

It's odd - who is this aimed at? Is Kim Jung Un delusional enough to think we fear him or to think that he'd follow through on his threats? Probably not - if he was that delusional, he would have attacked already. The fact that he hasn't attacked proves that he's still interested in staying alive and retains enough rational judgement to realize that he would lose if he tried to fight the South.

So... is this for internal consumption? I doubt the North Korean people even know this movie exists - so why bring it up? Why tell them about it? Or is this a sign to his generals that he won't brook disrespect (although he will in fact certainly brook it since he can't doing a damn thing about it)? I'm not sure what they gain from shouting these threats.

Are they aware that the whole world laughs at them? And that this just makes them look pathetic? That every time they go on a cold-war, hyperbolic rant and make threats they dare not carry through, the rest of the world just thinks they look so very, very, VERY.... sad?

They can't be that stupid - they must know the world has no respect for their government at all. So why? Force of habit?

 

[Do4600]

Those stats aren't exactly impressive, what they are armed with is the equivalent of muskets.

That's interesting. When I was there, they looked more like Chinese knock-offs of the AK-47. Must be pretty hard to muzzle load the most successful assault rifle in history.

An Ak-47 is practically a musket. That's my point. Iraq had the fourth largest army in the world before the Persian Gulf War and was utterly decimated in every battle. The total amount of US casualties from 1990 to 1991 was 760, the total Iraqi casualties estimated by the US military for the conflict was 23,000. The independent estimates for Iraqi casualties are in the hundreds of thousands. The tank battles alone give you an idea of just how the age of equipment changes warfare. Hundreds of Iraqi tanks were destroyed in the Gulf War, zero american tanks were destroyed though many were disabled. The size of the army doesn't matter nearly as much as the quality of the technology that it utilizes.

Do you news? A lot of the global outcry against North Korea is because of the starvation and whatnot that occurs because they're supporting such a large army. And that's been going on since at least the mid-80s. Yet there's been no big civilian uprising in the country... I wonder why that is.

My point is that trying to move that army anywhere would make the already bad situation worse due to spoilage.

They may have the fourth largest army in the world but it's even more useless than Saddam's.

 

[geldonyetich]

Dollars to donuts, it's being done for publicity, and I'm not entirely sure the studio isn't in on it.

 

[Do4600]

They may have the fourth largest army in the world but it's even more useless than Saddam's.

I have to disagree.

Korea is a confined area: a moderately wooded, hilly peninsula the size and shape of the state of Illinois (NK and SK combined). Iraq is a large, flat desert with relatively few choke points, defensive terrain, or cover outside the scattered urban areas.

North Korea can bring a substantial amount of force to bear on a relatively narrow front while minimizing the line-of-sight kill zones that were prevalent in the Gulf War.

I really doubt it would make a difference against an army that is essentially a suite of electronic surveillance created for the sole purpose of detecting, tracking and guiding ordinance against large scale military deployments. Detecting a tank battalion from space and destroying it from eight miles away, easy. Detecting and preventing terrorism in the middle east, nearly impossible.

 

[Zetatrain]

Also if that army is anywhere but North Korea they would starve to death, or the farmers would starve to death producing food to feed them.

Do you news? A lot of the global outcry against North Korea is because of the starvation and whatnot that occurs because they're supporting such a large army. And that's been going on since at least the mid-80s. Yet there's been no big civilian uprising in the country... I wonder why that is.

Probably because they put down any such attempts at uprising before they can even begin.

Admittedly given how cut off North Korea is from the rest of the world it is hard to verify claims of mass starvation by dissidents, defectors and watch groups. The only time we know for sure that there was mass starvation was the "Arduous March" which lasted from 1994-1998 and killed anywhere from 250,000 to 3,500,000 people.

However, according to the Food and Agriculture Organization of the UN, NK's grain harvest last year was nearly double that of their grain harvest back in 1998. Sources within South Korea was also claim the North Korea's growth rate has averaged about 1.3% over the past 15 years. This has led some people to conclude that North Korea is no longer a starving nation, but is still heavily malnourished. However, other groups claim that despite these improvements, several parts of North Korea still suffer from starvation which is the cause of unequal distribution among the population (heavily favoring the military and the "upper class").

 

[2012 Wont Happen]

I wonder how America would react if two star actors from a foreign country made a movie about killing Obama. I bet they'd skip the empty threats of war, but I doubt the reaction would be friendly.

 

[IamLEAM1983]

North Korea: "Notice us! NOTICE US NOW! WE'RE DANGEROUS! SERIOUSLY DANGEROUS!"
The Rest of the World: "Aww, innit cute, huh? North Korea's playing Grown-Ups again..."

I wouldn't be too worried, considering how half of their equipment dates back to the Cold War. There's an image floating around somewhere of Kim Jong-Un using a Trackball mouse to ogle a missile command station's interface for the sake of a few State-sanctioned press-issued glory shots.

Seriously. A SCSI Trackball. In 2014.

Nope. Not impressed.

On the other hand, what does impress me is how a few searches show just how thorough the country's higher education system happens to be. As should be expected, North Korea likes to shit out a ton of newly-minted engineers every single year, all neatly single-filed towards the defense program.

That is, when you *do* get up to postgrad levels. Most of the country is made up of uneducated agricultural workers who might be super lucky if they see the rear end of a busted Soviet OBGON arcade cabinet.