One-line confessions

[Cpt_Oblivious]

I love you.

 

[superbatranger]

Maybe spiking your drink was a bad idea. But, at least you can't see the tattoo on your ass.

 

[Koeryn]

I admit it.

I never save in Stalker: SoC.

I've had to walk the same 4 kilometers over, and over, and over. And do I learn? No. No I don't.

 

[Ekonk]

This probably isn't madness.

This probably (most likely, I daresay) isn't Sparta.

 

[RetroViruses]

I can't say no to a nice girl.

Calumon: I ate all the pies.

...am I the only one that caught the double-entendre?

OT: Me and a cute girl were aggressively flirting...I later found out she was in Grade 7...I swear to god I'm not pedo, was positive she was in at least Grade 9 (I was 17 at the time)

 

[PrimoThePro]

It wasn't really over 9000.

Correct, it was only over 8000. But no one knows that.
OT: I have trafficked M rated games to minors.

 

[BlackStar42]

I...am a Civ addict.

 

[The Clown]

fine then..... i pissed in all the pies and on the pizza... AND THE COOKIES

 

[Monkfish Acc.]

I am desperately trying to think of a tired old meme I can spin in a humorous way to make it into a confession.

All the ones I come up with have already been done.

 

[Mr S]

I'm shy around girls

 

[The Unworthy Gentleman]

I was the one who stole the cookie from the cookie jar!

 

[SilverUchiha]

This probably isn't madness.

I'd be willing to bet this isn't Sparta either.

 

[someonehairy-ish]

I ate all your bees...

Cookie for reference.

Bill Bailey ate my bees :/ on a spit, I think. Whilst reading from a survival book.

OT:
I once put a man in hospital with a small turnip, a plastic spatula and a bent spoon. It haunts my dreams even now :|

 

[Fraught]

I sometimes randomly find myself looking for information about people over the internet. I've now decided to completely stop trying to find things out about people that they wouldn't otherwise tell me.

Oh shi-

So that means that...you were...tha--that guy.
Holy shit.

Uh--uhh...uhm...*slowly walks farther from Tharwen*

*Giggles maniacally*

What makes you say that?
[sub][sub][sub]I know the location of everyone you care about.[/sub][/sub][/sub]

T-th-the evidence! The eviden--EEEEEK.

Nooo! Not those I care about! Anyone but them! Please!

 

[Dead_Man]

the cake wasn't a lie

 

[Baby Tea]

The truth is I'm too afraid of the future to take advantage of the present.

After reading through two pages of tired (and totally lame) joke confessions, this one really stuck out to me.
I mean, it's a simple, yet also an extremely profound and human confession that I think so many of us can share.

No dumb joke to lighten the mood, just a profoundly simple, deeply meaningful statement.

Seriously.

I feel like I want to elaborate on it, share my own experiences, but I can't help but think I'd ruin the simplicity, and therefore the power, of the original statement. Well said, well written, well done. I use to share that sentiment, and I can say it's worth it to fight it.

 

[Danzaivar]

I read these forums to feed my ego.

 

[T-Bone24]

This probably isn't madness.

I'd be willing to bet this isn't Sparta either.

Actually, if it's not madness, then there is a reasonable chance that it is in fact Sparta. Just saying.

I get lost in detail, and it greatly limits any and all choices I have.

 

[NonyaZ]

I spit in a urinal before I use it.

 

[Not-here-anymore]

I've been leading a girl on for about 3 years - partially because I don't know how to let her down gently, and partly because she's a fallback option...

At 20 years old, I'm now ashamed of my virginity.

I strongly considered killing myself at one point, and have since lied to everyone who's asked me about it.

...That was bleak. Um... I'm worried about how much money I seem to be spending on chocolate!