Online: A haven for the "interesting" population.

[Canadamus Prime]

I have never really felt I fit in anywhere. I wouldn't be caught dead at a club or a bar, and although I pine for female companionship of the long term variety, I know I'm not going to find that at any club or bar. I also hate sports, so I spend most of my free time either playing video games or browsing forums. Besides I get uncomfortable in a large social engagement, my usual thoughts during a social engagement involve wondering how soon I can politely excuse myself.
I guess what I'm getting at is, you're not alone.

 

[Hexadecimal]

Honestly, if you feel like the internet makes better company than ANYONE else in your life, then whatev. You don't need to listen to people's ideas of what a "healthy" life should be.

I would just advise you not to shun the entire human population. Go out once in a while. It doesn't have to be clubbing or anything like that, you can just get a cup of coffee and relax for an hour or so in somewhere other than your home.

I'm by no means a social butterfly, but I do know that there are at least a couple of people out there worth talking to, and if you find them they'll be worth a hundred times more than the people you see as words on a screen.

 

[supermaster1337]

Do what you want and makes sure it makes you happy, if what your doing makes you happy keep doing it.

 

[Low Key]

To each their own, I say. I know where you are coming from on the whole club scene, but I do enjoy playing sports, probably because I am fairly good at them. I was a loser for most of my school days, but I could still kick everyones ass in basketball and baseball, which is probably one of the reasons I was accepted in the long run.

Perhaps I just can't be couped up inside all day. I like going outside and getting some sun once in a while. I start to feel depressed if I don't.

 

[Baltist]

i gotta agree completely to the post. yeah, there are some nice people out there, but my nice-idiot/jackass ratio is extremely low. i'm the guy where if i decide to go to a movie or a store, i get extremely pissed at people that say hi (friends not included). i understand it's a nice gesture, but when you hear a million a week, it gets irritating. then again i hate buses, subways or just crowds in general. as for sex, there's a worldwide over-population problem, so i don't think the human race is in extreme danger if i choose not to have sex. marriage is pointless for me as it's a very easy way to get screwed, both in the wallet/property and dignity. why fight for a country when they are usually fighting over stupid shit? is this really a problem, or maybe people need to see it from the people's view on their surroundings before saying they have a problem. then again, people can be very social on the internet.

 

[VanityGirl]

uh.. Clubs are icky, been there, done that, didn't like it.
I just think you need social interaction with more people that have the same tastes as you. By branching out a little, you may be surprised at how much you have in common with another person.
Some of my better buddies are on the web, but my best friends are real life people who I can poke in the eye and know they are there.

There's plenty of ways for you to meet people, you just need to WANT to meet people.

 

[DanDeFool]

But it wouldn't hurt for you to get one or two more hobbies. Not that you HAVE to but, WoW won't always be there, and you can hardly share in that experience with other people (in the same room as you).

I detect a foot in a mouth here. Isn't the whole point of a Massively MULTIPLAYER Online game that you ARE sharing in the experience with other people? Maybe it's not the same as rock climbing or whatever, but it is A form of social interaction.

i agree there are some good people out there.

so lets say there is 1 amazing person in every 10 people you meet outside. well, personally id rather not dig through 9 dumpsters to find the one w/ diamonds in it. id rather stay clean and out of dumpsters.

Yeah; 1/10 is pretty much the rate these days.

I'm gonna wager that the reason you like places like The Escapist is because you share the same interests with the people who populate such places. And you'll have trouble finding people like this in clubs/bars/etc. because the people who populate those kinds of places are usually the types who find places like The Escapist boring and stupid.

I have three or four friends that I genuinely enjoy hanging out with IRL, precisely because we share common interests and they won't judge me for being a nerd or staying stupid shit from time to time.

If you want to have sex, you should try online personals and ICQ. It is entirely possible to meet interesting, attractive women online. Of course, you'll still be digging through the garbage, but at least you can do it while you're playing WoW, right?

 

[The Rockerfly]

Le snip

May I ask how old are you?

 

[nezroy]

You're an introvert. It's fine.

 

[Taerdin]

But it wouldn't hurt for you to get one or two more hobbies. Not that you HAVE to but, WoW won't always be there, and you can hardly share in that experience with other people (in the same room as you).

I detect a foot in a mouth here. Isn't the whole point of a Massively MULTIPLAYER Online game that you ARE sharing in the experience with other people? Maybe it's not the same as rock climbing

I detect a lack of reading ability. If you meet someone 'IRL' then you can't very well bring them over to your place to have them watch you raid. I said in the same room as you...

Thanks for coming off like a jerk though, I appreciated it.

Also I hate putting feet in my mouth, sorry ladies

 

[Spleenbag]

There's nothing wrong with that; I don't enjoy "standard" socialization like clubbing (or the teen equivalent anyway, parties) or dances or anything and I do just fine. Introverts of the world, unite... over the internet!

 

[Slayer_2]

In a way, I know what you mean, but I enjoy socializing. Not gossip and bullshit like that, but just being with people who enjoy the same things I do.

 

[vampirekid.13]

Le snip

May I ask how old are you?

22 years old, in the military.

 

[Mstrswrd]

its not that easy you see, im in the military, so my supervisors can and often do show "interest/concern" regarding my life off duty. because its important to have "healthy life styles" in a "demanding job such as military service"

Ah, well, then tell them that this is how you unwind, that after a long days work, going out simply makes you more tired (which, for an introvert like myself, and, from the sound of it, you, it would), to the point of losing patience with everyone. The fact is, introverts do not like to socialize. Hence the name introvert, and not extrovert.

For an introvert, the act of socializing is not a relaxing thing. It taxes us mentally, physically, and, often times, brings right to the edge of our emotional control if we have to do it against our will over and over. An introvert rests by being alone, and that is the only way an introvert truly recharges their emotional batteries.

Extroverts go out and do extroverted things to recharge, like hang out with people. From the sound of it, they are trying to force you, an full introvert (again, like me), into being an extrovert, which will cause more harm than good. Explain this to them.

I do question why you are in the military if you don't like people, though. Isn't that a really people oriented job?

Anyway, if you can convey to your... ugh... counselors (you have to see them now, right?) that you are an introvert, in the most modern sense of the word (Recharges by being alone, gets exhausted around people), you'll probably be fine. If not, well, is it possible for you to get out of the millitary? Seriously, sometimes the best way is to simply let go of what is causing the problems (again, only if possible). I'm not saying leave (if you can), but just saying that it might be for the best, if only as a last resort.

 

[PhiMed]

I don't think you should necessarily forced to do anything you don't want to, and you're certainly free to behave however you like. I wouldsay, however, that interactions with flesh and blood people with faces and bodies you can see and touch are (or should be) more rewarding than simple text blurbs with people you've never actually met.

These interesting people you like are real, walking around. Sure, most people suck, but if you never ever give anyone a chance, you'll never find out who the worthwhile people around you might be. It sounds like you're afraid of being judged based on some superficial trait, but you're doing exactly that when you instantly assume that everyone you meet is a judgemental prick. Just my two cents.

 

[vampirekid.13]

I don't think you should necessarily forced to do anything you don't want to, and you're certainly free to behave however you like. I wouldsay, however, that interactions with flesh and blood people with faces and bodies you can see and touch are (or should be) more rewarding than simple text blurbs with people you've never actually met.

These interesting people you like are real, walking around. Sure, most people suck, but if you never ever give anyone a chance, you'll never find out who the worthwhile people around you might be. It sounds like you're afraid of being judged based on some superficial trait, but you're doing exactly that when you instantly assume that everyone you meet is a judgemental prick. Just my two cents.

someone had to read my post that way i was just waiting for it to happen.


i dont think everyone is a judgemental prick. i just dont see why people expect me to put my foot forward in the race to find the decent people. personally i like being alone, i want to be left alone, and online i can just close the game/browser and be by myself and im happier than ill ever be around someone else.

so if the decent/jerk ratio is 1:10 why do people expect me to go out and find that 1 person in the 10 jerks? i dont get it, its some pre-accepted standard that humans are social or something. Well i say forget being social. forget having a GF, i like being alone, and not everyone is a prick, but since i dont really want to hang out w/ anyone i dont see why ppl expect me to go out and find the not so idiotic people.

 

[The Rockerfly]

Le snip

May I ask how old are you?

22 years old, in the military.

Because I used to think exactly like you did. I stopped thinking like that because well I think I just grew up, maybe it's not the same for everyone

The thing is most people are not stupid, everything everyone does is for a done because of a reason. Even if the reason is small and petty. Maybe don't go where you would have thought to socialise, go and try new places
If not then good luck with living like that, although in my opinion I think in a few years time you will grow tired of it
Just my 2 cents

 

[JamminOz07]

22 years old, in the military.

hey yr obviously not a complete social reject cause you have a job and don't mind communicating under your own terms (ie the internet).

I would suggest you do the absolute least that you need to get yr supervisors off yr back. Live your life the way you want, don't completely give that up, just maybe go for a drink after work occasionally, always give yourself an 'out' if required.. like you can't stay out all night drinking cause you have to drive home, or get up early, whatever.

Just make the minimum effort required to appear more 'normal'. You never know, you might even actually find yourself having some fun!

 

[Charley]

Crikey...

Well, this may sound a lot like a dig, but much as this thread is a lovely piece of self-congratulating sociol phobic nonsense.. on behalf of all the people who come onto the Escapist that have friends, like the sun, are in relationships, jobs, have hobbies etc, may I suggest you get over yourself and chill?

Not everybody is an idiot, sure they don't like the same things as you do but that's what makes the world interesting. Assuming that everything you don't like is a lesser form of entertainment is arrogant to the extreme.

The reason your supervisors are concerned is that, in behavioural terms, humans are a social animal - not liking people etc. is, in Victorian terms, "abnormal"; and it's natural for people to be concerned when someone is shutting everyone out. It doesn't make them nosey jerks, just people reacting to a concern.

A lot of people hit your phase between 13 and 15 years old - "nobody understands me" "I'm the only intelligent individual here" etc. A couple of years of door slamming and death metal and people grow out of it, make the effort to meet some people and never look back.

Can I recommend that as a next step?

 

[AvsJoe]

Loved the rant, but I gotta nitpick here:

less than heterosexual

First off, this line implies that being gay means you are less of a human than those who are straight. Not cool, man.

i am way underweight. I am indeed weighing 160lbs, and i am 6ft 2in.

Holy shit you're tiny. I can snap you like a twig. The day will come when you wish you weren't so small, I suggest you err on the side of caution and bulk up a little.

But like I said I'm nitpicking. That's a fantastic post.
And on topic: yes you are correct and I too prefer the online crowd rather than the crowds IRL.