Phrases that piss you off

[Valkrex]

Someone's probably said it, but "PC Master Race!"

I can understand if you're joking about it and making it obvious that you're using it ironically, but there are people who use it without irony and it just pisses me off. I mostly game on PC, but that doesn't make me any better than those who don't. It just means I prefer to play on PC.

Whoop de fucking doo.

Whenever I see someone use that phrase without irony, and use it to try and make themselves look better then console gamers, while talking down at them in a condescending manner (which is too fucking common these days) I lose a little bit more of my faith in the gaming community, and just get pissed off. People can game however the hell they want, it doesn't matter what platform as long as they're having fun and not being an asshole.

 

[Valkrex]

Alright, I thought of another phrase a bit more on topic. A phrase that DOES piss me off.

The "shitty lock" / "good key" analogy.

It just plays into sexist stereotypes, where a women who sleeps around is considered "slutty", whereas if a man does the same thing then that's perfectly fine.

I always counter this by saying something along the lines of "Well you can only put a pencil in a sharpener so many times before the pencil is useless, while the pencil sharpener can just keep going no problems and will work just fine." That tends to shut those idiots up. Nothing wrong with having sex, or having a lot of it if you enjoy it.

 

[epicdwarf]

"LOL [insert religious thing here] iz fake/illogical/2old N ur stupid for believing in it XD"
Mostly hat this because of the people who use it. Usually used by Amazingathiest wannabes that are full of themselves. They go around spamming this shit when ever something religious is mentioned at all. It just gets on my nerves.

 

[Frankster]

That's actually basically what YOLO is meant to mean.

Heh then the vast majority of people I know use it in the wrong way then. I've really come to associate YOLO as justification for trying foolhardy things that puts you at great risk if you fail.

Cheers for the trivia!

 

[C F]

Not too fond of "fur is murder", though to be fair I haven't heard it too often.

Murder, at least here in the States but likely in other countries as well, has the definition of "an unlawful premeditated killing of a human being". It is, by definition, impossible to murder an animal under that criterion. It's not murder. You're just using that word because you want to draw attention to the fact animals get killed, specifically drawing a negative connotation around the "get killed" part. It's a literary misuse though, and it bugs me.

If you want to lend any sort of credibility to your argument, you could say "fur is unethical". It's not nearly as catchy though, and I've made up my mind on the subject long ago.

"Have your cake and eat it too"

What else are you supposed to want to do with newly acquired cake? Does hypothetical cake taste bad or something?

A lot of people, I find, fixate on the cake moreso than the purpose of the phrase. It's just outlining the fact that once you consume something, it will naturally no longer be in your possession.
You can have either the object in your possession, or make use of the object in your possession, knowing the price is to no longer have that object. It's a simple, but sadly irreversible trade-off that applies to delicacies such as cake, money, a bottle of fine wine, a particularly glorious explosive like a firework or an incendiary grenade, or the Master Ball from Pokémon.

Sometimes you just dread using it because you know at that moment it will be gone. Ka-put. Unavailable for future use. Some people never use the Master Ball because the knowledge the stars could align and summon up a shiny Entei is simply too great a cost to put on using it. If you meet enough people who play Pokémon, you know at least one of them has this issue.

I'll agree though, the "cake" part is pretty silly. Cakes are cheap nowadays, and we hand them fluffydoughs out at every kid's birthday party. Back in the sixteenth century, cake was a much more luxurious and not nearly as readily available good, and the thought of simply possessing a cake was pretty sweet, for reasons other than "aww yeah I'mma eat this cake". Hallmark of considerable status and all that.
The idiom probably carried much more weight back then than it did now.

If you want, every time you hear the phrase just mentally substitute it for "One or the other; you can't have both." That's basically what it boils down to.

 

[zelda2fanboy]

"Are you serious?" If you have to ask, then yes, I most likely am. And if you're just using it as an exclamation to no one in particular, then you're asking reality itself a rhetorical question and that is even more inane. It also makes anyone who says it sound like a spoiled teenager.

 

[MalinoreIce]

I've been told a phrase about myself and it bothers me, "You're so cute," I get it but really, it's gotten so old. Why do people say that to me, cause I am short, small, and look like I am a young teenager. I am an adult, and just because I am short doesn't mean anything and so what that I don't age, is that a bad thing.

One of my co-workers said, "you need to smile because it makes you more cute, so smile. You're still cute when you don't smile but you should smile."

Other than that, I can't think of any other phrases that bothers me.

 

[Suhi89]

I'm a sports fan and as any sports fan knows, sports commentators are full of boring cliches. So here's a list.

-"If X team/player plays like that against Y team/player they'll get thrashed." This is probably the one that annoys me most, especially when X and Y are fairly equally matched (which they usually are). If nothing else, there is usually a performance in Y's recent past that would allow the exact opposite to be said. No one knows how either team or player will play on that particular day, and just because they played poorly the week before, doesn't mean that form will continue.

-"They wanted it more." Probably occasionally true, but difficult to quantify how much a player wants to win. Usually gets trotted out when one team or player simply shows better skill or fitness.

-"That was a bad time to concede." Most times are bad times to concede (maybe not the 90th minute for the Germans last night). I get where they're coming from but it still bugs me.

-"If it wasn't for X player, they would have lost" Well yes but X player was in the team, doing the job he was, in fact, payed to do. If you take him out then why not take out the best opposition players too.

-"Luck evens itself out" I don't believe there is any evidence of this in life or in sport. An example of the just world fallacy.

There are a ton more but grrr those irritate me.

 

[vIRL Nightmare]

"Wait till you get to the real world". Listen, I'm an engineer, one year to graduate sure but I'm an engineer. I have had 2 co-ops with actual tasks related to my field. Those times were the best times of my life. I was solving actual problems, I had more free time then my on semesters taking classes. I was paid for my time and effort. I managed to help save the company I was with $50,000 roughly in yearly production because of a system I helped optimize. The "real world" was far easier then the bull shit I had to deal with in college. Whats more it was fr more enjoyable because instead of being given an elaborate problem with 20 missing variables shoe-horning me into on correct way to solve, my team was given a task a final date and told to see what we could do.

I don't know what liberal arts major the people that preach this statement came from, but I'll take a career that has me solve actual issues using real methods like working with colleges for pay for 40 hours a week over the glorified bullshit the current broken education system has us go through. I have literally flipped screaming, "I just wanted to do my fucking homework" because of how messed up and ass backwards the system I have to deal with is. All of the students here have to deal with it too, even if we offer better solutions we can't use them because of one reason or another. The agony that comes in using a horribly inefficient CAD program that takes hours to do what took me 15 minutes in any of the other options.

 

[Diddy_Mao]

Any member of the police or armed forces who replies to a statement they disagree with, with the phrase:

"Y'know I fought to protect your right to say *insert disagreed statement.*"

Or some variation thereof.

That's your job asshole. You signed up to do whatever you did/do in exchange for a paycheque.
It doesn't give you carte blanche to become the thought police.

 

[jFr[e]ak93]

Anything that is followed by "But"

I'm not racist... but

No offence... but

I would like that... but

It's usually used as a way of saying horrible, offensive or hurtful things without having to deal with the fallout. Drives me nuts.

 

[lechat]

using an average followed by an inexact figure:

"I average 40 - 60 thousand dollars a year"

so you average 50 thousand dollars a year?

 

[Phil the Nervous]

"You're doing it wrong."/"You're wrong" (without any explanation or reason)

No, I'm doing it differently, your ignorance of how I do things doesn't give you the right to tell me I'm wrong for not being you.
People who assume that different people are (bad/wrong) because they're different tend to bug me in general.

 

[AD-Stu]

"I could care less." the words mean literally the opposite of "I couldn't care less."

David Mitchell makes the case quite nicely here: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=om7O0MFkmpw

^ you took the words right out of my mouth

What really got me about this one was there's a band (Devildriver, I think) who have this in big bold letters on the back of one of their shirts... making both the band, and the fans wearing the shirt, look like idiots. Sigh...

 

[Ihateregistering1]

-When people say "because...reasons". I can't think of a smarmier and more obnoxious statement, and it has the amazing ability to not only make you look unintelligent, but also make you look like someone who's not smart but thinks they are. It basically says "I can't beat your argument or I don't have the ability to understand it, therefore I'm going to act like it's beneath me to even try".

-That damn Willy Wonka meme that cranks the smugness to 11. That thing just annoys the hell out of me.

-"Everyone is ___________!" (insert feel good phrase here). I get it that the various positive adjectives you can put in there are in the eye of the beholder, but if everyone is something, then it sort of defeats the whole idea of that thing being a compliment in the first place. It'd be like saying "everyone has cells!" and thinking it's going to make people feel better.

 

[gargantual]

"Isn't it ironic." When you really mean to say coincidental. Some people need to look in the dictionary and remember what irony means.

 

[geK0]

"Why not just be more confident?"
I'm a little soft spoken but I have a fairly positive self image, I take this phrase as an insult. Not only is it VERY unhelpful advice, but it really irks me when people assume my mild nature is problematic.

"he/she is dating out of their league."
This comes off as extremely superficial and just makes you look like a giant dick. Obviously there's something that attracted them to each other, why be so cynical about it?

"If it's meant to be it will happen" or "I guess it wasn't meant to be"
I'd like to think I have a little more agency than that. Nothing is really "meant to be" life is random and things just happen, and if you want things to happen a certain way then you have to make those things happen.

"It's the 21st century!" (when referring to some form of racism, homophobia or other politically incorrect thing)
While I probably agree with your sentiment, this isn't a real argument. You're not going to convince anyone to reflect on their behavior by reminding them what century it is.

"Would you like to pre-order any games?"
NO! I realize your boss makes you ask this, and I hate Gamestop for making this a thing.

"Can you check to see if there are any left in the back?"
FUCK OFF! There's none in the back! If there were any in the back the shelf wouldn't be empty! I have already told other customers that the item is sold out and it has been sold out for several hours now! THERE ARE NONE IN THE BACK ROOM AND IF THERE WERE IT WOULD BE STOCKED BY NOW! Maybe you should come looking for sale items before 6PM!

"1990? is this a real ID?"
I have a youthful appearance and could pass for a 10th grader easily, this gets very annoying.While I'm not always questioned verbally, I'm always given a suspicious look when presenting my ID.

 

[symphonymarie]

"Whole grain popcorn".
Really? Like, what else would it be?

I'll have some whole grain popcorn with my gluten free water, then, I guess.

 

[iLikeHippos]

"I could care less." the words mean literally the opposite of "I couldn't care less."

?

No, it doesn't. That's silly. The opposite of not caring would be the person in question listening to you with the utmost attention, as whatever you are saying is purely divine to them, or even more important than that! They would tell the whole world to shut up for a second or two, if they could, just so they can peak their ears to your closest mouth-hole. They would even, if necessary, expose you to any mean required to make you slip whatever you are talking about in full detail.

When people usually say "I could care less", they are implying this in a negative light, that they are, in Internet slang, running out of fucks to give.
They do care what you are feeling, or you as a person, or respect you in some way or another, but whatever you are saying is considered tiresome and they can't be bothered to really reply in any other way than "Uh-huh" "Oh yeah" or "Really?" in a very monotone way.

It's usually meant to not hurt your feelings, but at the same time pointing out that perhaps the topic of, I don't know, knee-pads and their importance in society isn't exactly striking gold with them.


OT: "Food for thought", usually added at the end of an extremely cheesy story, argument or quote that a 13 year old or an adult with a prepubescent mind finds cool and desires to share the world with, or try and inspire like-minded people.

I'm sorry if I am not such a damn simpleton that I stop to think in awe whenever I see something completely fucking obvious in front of my eyes, but I just get so exhausted. NO, you are NOT clever, nor inspirational, and neither is whatever you're quoting...
Just... Stop. Please?