Please help me.

[Mr S]

Okay here's what's up. I'm a virgin, have never had a girlfriend before and I've never gone out on a date before.

Now we've got that out of the way, I'm gonna need some advice.
There's this girl I really like at my school, but I don't think that she thinks of me as someone who likes here.
She probably just sees me as some weird guy she talks to, has some fun with.
She is very pretty, I know of at least one other guy who likes her, and she has sort of a dark humor.
She likes it when people trip and stuff so she can point and laugh. That makes her sound like a ***** doesn't it?
Well she's not.

Please anyone? This plea for help especially goes out to the women/girls at the escapist since in my experience, guys mostly say: JUST F****NG KISS HER!!! SHE'LL GET THE MESSAGE!

Don't bother laughing at me, this was a last resort, I've been laughed at before.

 

[ConnorCool]

Do as feels comfortable, at your own pace. Don't do as others do, as that wont work for you necessarily. Also, if rejected, which could happen but hopefully not, be cool about it, she will more than likely be respectful if you aren't depressive and mopey.
Go on askmen.com, I find that site helpful to take tips from on all manner of things!

 

[Mr S]

Thanks ConnorCool

 

[EviladeBlazingDemon]

Just try to spend lots of time with her for a while and if it doesn't become clear if she likes you or not, tell her how you feel.

 

[Palademon]

I like dark humour too. I think you're talking about sadism. I don't think she's a *****, I laugh at that stuff too.

Just be yourself, find common ground, something to do together. And once you feel comfortable ask her out (to something...I'm not good at advice on that).

I'm in your situation too, but that's my only advice. I have only been rejected once and it was in a bad way because the girl was uncapable of just saying no or giving a real reason.

And if you don't have common ground and if you just get on really well, then hope is not lost.

 

[Sara Fontaine]

What I would suggest if you're really nervous is to not suddenly change the way you behave around/towards her. If you suddenly become a lot more attentive she'll realise what's going on and will probably assume that you aren't serious. Just keep things going at the same pace, nice and friendly. You know the sorts of things she's interested in, I presume, so talk to her about those things; maybe suggest something that you think she'd like. Go with your gut instinct; if you feel that you might be able to start hinting at the way you feel, maybe begin to give her a compliment here or there (but don't over do it!). And when/if you get the courage to admit how you feel don't just blurt it out. Try taking her to one side and just be honest; don't skirt around it and hope she'll realise what you're getting at, just say outright that you really like her. If you're honest about it she'll appreciate it more. Don't try and act too cool (eg. "Wanna go out with me or whatever?"),otherwise she won't take you seriously. And I agree with the above post that if it gets to the point where you actually ask her out and she says no, don't blow up in her face, say that you understand and you hope you can still remain friends. Friendship is better than awkward silence, right?

Anyway, I hope I helped and I hope it works out for you

 

[Erana]

My advice? Don't be hurt if she doesn't feel the same way towards you. A lot of the best (and most attractive) people I know have trouble finding someone. Just remember that who you are is more important than trying to date.
This does change when you're actually committed to someone, but finding the right person is the first step.

 

[AssassinJoe]

Join the club, we meet on thursdays.

Seriously, don't scare her off. I did that with my first girlfriend because I came on too strong. Since then I have not had the courage to even ask a girl out.

And of course just be yourself. If she already likes hanging out with you then she must like the kind of person you are.... maybe.

Overall, what ConnorCool said.

 

[A Satanic Panda]

Fortune favors the bold... just remember that next time you see her.

 

[Mr S]

What I would suggest if you're really nervous is to not suddenly change the way you behave around/towards her. If you suddenly become a lot more attentive she'll realise what's going on and will probably assume that you aren't serious.

I'm not too nervous or shy, I'm just feeling nervous, I'm not showing it.
Today we wrestled a bit over a piece of wood, just a lot of harmless fun.
But I'm not too nervous, I just don't know how to take it to the next step.
Do I ask her out? Where to? That sort of stuff :s

 

[CakeDragon]

Pretty much what's been said really.
A nice idea to try is to ask if she wants to meet up and hang out at the weekend with you - go into town, mooch around, offer to pay for a pizza or something, and take it from there. That worked on me and that was over 2 and a half years ago now, still happily in a relationship with my bloke.

 

[Sara Fontaine]

What I would suggest if you're really nervous is to not suddenly change the way you behave around/towards her. If you suddenly become a lot more attentive she'll realise what's going on and will probably assume that you aren't serious.

I'm not too nervous or shy, I'm just feeling nervous, I'm not showing it.
Today we wrestled a bit over a piece of wood, just a lot of harmless fun.
But I'm not too nervous, I just don't know how to take it to the next step.
Do I ask her out? Where to? That sort of stuff :s

If you're uncertain about asking her out straight away, just ask her if she'd like to hang out as friends first. You can either just invite her or some other friends too. Like I said before, you know the sorts of things she's interested in, so if you can think of something relevant it would help. If you're really struggling though, you can't really go wrong with going out for food.

 

[niege]

OMG you are me i have the same problem :O

 

[Mr S]

What I would suggest if you're really nervous is to not suddenly change the way you behave around/towards her. If you suddenly become a lot more attentive she'll realise what's going on and will probably assume that you aren't serious.

I'm not too nervous or shy, I'm just feeling nervous, I'm not showing it.
Today we wrestled a bit over a piece of wood, just a lot of harmless fun.
But I'm not too nervous, I just don't know how to take it to the next step.
Do I ask her out? Where to? That sort of stuff :s

If you're uncertain about asking her out straight away, just ask her if she'd like to hang out as friends first. You can either just invite her or some other friends too. Like I said before, you know the sorts of things she's interested in, so if you can think of something relevant it would help. If you're really struggling though, you can't really go wrong with going out for food.

I already asked her if she wanted to come over saturday, along with 3 other friends from the same school. We're watching some movies then and they were sleeping over but she had an appointment the next day so she couldn't make it.
Last wednesday we had a party at school and this guy I mentioned earlier was with his face 1 inch from hers and with his boner half an inch from her pants. She didn't really seem to mind, but I can't be like that guy, I don't feel confident to just get that close to her and say those nice things and... I'm going crazy.

 

[Mr S]

OMG you are me i have the same problem :O

nice to know I'm not the only one niege

 

[Sara Fontaine]

I already asked her if she wanted to come over saturday, along with 3 other friends from the same school. We're watching some movies then and they were sleeping over but she had an appointment the next day so she couldn't make it.
Last wednesday we had a party at school and this guy I mentioned earlier was with his face 1 inch from hers and with his boner half an inch from her pants. She didn't really seem to mind, but I can't be like that guy, I don't feel confident to just get that close to her and say those nice things and... I'm going crazy.

Well... that guy who had his face 1 inch away from her sounds a little creepy, so no... don't do that. I think you need to realise that going up to her and just saying "I like you" isn't really that much of a huge deal. People say it to each other everyday; it's normal. If it's getting to you this much then I think that the best thing for you to do is the next time you see her you should take some deep breaths, remind yourself that the earth won't open up and swallow you for asking her and get it over with. Don't blurt it out; tell her that you think she's a really good friend and a nice person and that you've come to like her a little more than just a friend and you would like to spend more time with her.

I will assume that you're worried about her reaction too? Well if she starts laughing in your face and being cruel then she wasn't worth it to begin with. But you've already said she's a really nice girl, so I would say that the worst she can do is say no. And like I said, if she does it's not the end of the world. Just say that you understand and that you hope you can still be friends. And if she says yes, well then, mission accomplished and you can pat yourself on the back. Good luck.

 

[Mr S]

I already asked her if she wanted to come over saturday, along with 3 other friends from the same school. We're watching some movies then and they were sleeping over but she had an appointment the next day so she couldn't make it.
Last wednesday we had a party at school and this guy I mentioned earlier was with his face 1 inch from hers and with his boner half an inch from her pants. She didn't really seem to mind, but I can't be like that guy, I don't feel confident to just get that close to her and say those nice things and... I'm going crazy.

Well... that guy who had his face 1 inch away from her sounds a little creepy, so no... don't do that. I think you need to realise that going up to her and just saying "I like you" isn't really that much of a huge deal. People say it to each other everyday; it's normal. If it's getting to you this much then I think that the best thing for you to do is the next time you see her you should take some deep breaths, remind yourself that the earth won't open up and swallow you for asking her and get it over with. Don't blurt it out; tell her that you think she's a really good friend and a nice person and that you've come to like her a little more than just a friend and you would like to spend more time with her.

I will assume that you're worried about her reaction too? Well if she starts laughing in your face and being cruel then she wasn't worth it to begin with. But you've already said she's a really nice girl, so I would say that the worst she can do is say no. And like I said, if she does it's not the end of the world. Just say that you understand and that you hope you can still be friends. And if she says yes, well then, mission accomplished and you can pat yourself on the back. Good luck.

Thanks for the advice I think it really works if not for that I've only known her for about 4 weeks. Or doesn't it matter that I don't know her for that long?

My school started late.

 

[Raikov]

I'd do what Sara says.

And even if you end up 'just' being friends, and fall into the famous "friend zone®", don't worry, because even if it feels like crap and your life is ending or whatever, if you've got the patience, the "friend zone®" can be your best way in.

Just hang in there.

 

[open trap]

Almost sounds like the girl im onto right now, but the problem is shes haing a fued with my best friend and his girlfriend, not cool.

 

[supermariner]

i know you specifically said in your intro it's the kind of advice you weren't after
but unless you make the first move you really won't know
in all the women i've been with i've never been certain if it was right to go for it
but if you don't it ain't likely she will
because they hardly ever do
even if they REALLY like you

and even if you get knocked back when you lean in for it
it's not like she'll just disappear out of your life or anything