Please help me.

[Mr S]

i know you specifically said in your intro it's the kind of advice you weren't after
but unless you make the first move you really won't know
in all the women i've been with i've never been certain if it was right to go for it
but if you don't it ain't likely she will
because they hardly ever do
even if they REALLY like you

and even if you get knocked back when you lean in for it
it's not like she'll just disappear out of your life or anything

I'm just guesssing you're from the US right? Or at least not from Europe. And definetely not from the Netherlands.

WE don't do that round here. We don't just kiss a girl without a heads-up or whatever. If she wouldn't like it, she would probably ruin my entire life on that school. That's why I'm so damn nervous. That and, I've never kissed a girl before.

 

[supermariner]

i know you specifically said in your intro it's the kind of advice you weren't after
but unless you make the first move you really won't know
in all the women i've been with i've never been certain if it was right to go for it
but if you don't it ain't likely she will
because they hardly ever do
even if they REALLY like you

and even if you get knocked back when you lean in for it
it's not like she'll just disappear out of your life or anything

I'm just guesssing you're from the US right? Or at least not from Europe. And definetely not from the Netherlands.

WE don't do that round here. We don't just kiss a girl without a heads-up or whatever. If she wouldn't like it, she would probably ruin my entire life on that school. That's why I'm so damn nervous. That and, I've never kissed a girl before.

actually i'm from England
and that's how it's done here
are you dutch then yourself?
it's all spur of the moment
you make hints you're interested first obviously
so they may suspect it's coming

 

[Mr S]

i know you specifically said in your intro it's the kind of advice you weren't after
but unless you make the first move you really won't know
in all the women i've been with i've never been certain if it was right to go for it
but if you don't it ain't likely she will
because they hardly ever do
even if they REALLY like you

and even if you get knocked back when you lean in for it
it's not like she'll just disappear out of your life or anything

I'm just guesssing you're from the US right? Or at least not from Europe. And definetely not from the Netherlands.

WE don't do that round here. We don't just kiss a girl without a heads-up or whatever. If she wouldn't like it, she would probably ruin my entire life on that school. That's why I'm so damn nervous. That and, I've never kissed a girl before.

actually i'm from England
and that's how it's done here
are you dutch then yourself?
it's all spur of the moment
you make hints you're interested first obviously
so they may suspect it's coming

I did mention that I am a TERRIBLE flirter simply because I never do it.
Yes I am Dutch by the way, our girls rock but they're hard to get for me.
And what kind of hints, I'm afraid I'm gonna need some examples.
(Told you I was bad at this)

 

[Magnalian]

The fact that I'm in a similiar situation, we're from the same country and almost the same age scares me a little. Let's see if there's some advice in here for me.

 

[Redlin5_v1legacy]

Be natural. Hang out with her, connect with her. Discuss what interests you and what interests her. She'll get the message and it will be very obvious whether she feels the same way or whether she is putting you in the friend zone.

Take her out for dinner if those more subtle methods are ineffective.

 

[Sara Fontaine]

actually i'm from England
and that's how it's done here
are you dutch then yourself?
it's all spur of the moment
you make hints you're interested first obviously
so they may suspect it's coming

I'm from England too and in my experience with my friends whenever a guy has just gone for it, they didn't like it. They said it gave the impression the guys just wanted the physical aspect of things, instead of actually talking to them first and getting to know them better. In my opinion it's just common courtesy to actually let people know how you feel first before trying to make a move.

 

[sir.rutthed]

Seriously man, just ask her out. If she says yes, you got a date. If she says no, you can stop wasting your time on her and move on to someone else. Also just walking up and kissing her is a great way to get slapped even in the US. I also suggest you just relax. Being a virgin isn't a bad thing and you shouldn't judge your self worth on your sexual prowess. You have more to offer than that, so focus on that and the rest will fall into place.

 

[supermariner]

I did mention that I am a TERRIBLE flirter simply because I never do it.
Yes I am Dutch by the way, our girls rock but they're hard to get for me.
And what kind of hints, I'm afraid I'm gonna need some examples.
(Told you I was bad at this)

well i don't want to qualify myself as being any good at this myself
but Redlin5 pretty much summed it up

Be natural. Hang out with her, connect with her. Discuss what interests you and what interests her. She'll get the message and it will be very obvious whether she feels the same way or whether she is putting you in the friend zone.

Take her out for dinner if those more subtle methods are ineffective.

the dinner thing is quite good
because you've only known each other a short time it might be difficult to gauge it so far
so to ask her for a meal is subtext
you've not told her you like her
but the act of asking her out to dinner is in itself the straightforward way of telling her without having to tell her
plus so long as you're suave and say the right things, the night out might just win her over

 

[Mr S]

actually i'm from England
and that's how it's done here
are you dutch then yourself?
it's all spur of the moment
you make hints you're interested first obviously
so they may suspect it's coming

I'm from England too and in my experience with my friends whenever a guy has just gone for it, they didn't like it. They said it gave the impression the guys just wanted the physical aspect of things, instead of actually talking to them first and getting to know them better. In my opinion it's just common courtesy to actually let people know how you feel first before trying to make a move.

But what would be the correct time to make a move?

Sorry I'm such a pain in the ass btw.

 

[Sirvincee]

I have learned two things in my 23 years of life on this planet. First, that girls like money, not just look at me im so rich(but thats good to), but guys that can buy them a drink or bring them to a movies and not go "my god why is it $12.50 to see a movie now a days". Second if you are going to ask her out on a date tell her it is a date. Now a days guys and girl do alot of things together that where at one point just date things, but now they can be just a guy hanging out with a girl(my god I sound old). well that's my two cents good luck and remember to hold the door for her.

 

[supermariner]

actually i'm from England
and that's how it's done here
are you dutch then yourself?
it's all spur of the moment
you make hints you're interested first obviously
so they may suspect it's coming

I'm from England too and in my experience with my friends whenever a guy has just gone for it, they didn't like it. They said it gave the impression the guys just wanted the physical aspect of things, instead of actually talking to them first and getting to know them better. In my opinion it's just common courtesy to actually let people know how you feel first before trying to make a move.

sorry, =]
i should have said, that's how it's done occassionally
maybe i'm from a particularly backwards town
but that's always been my method

 

[Secret world leader (shhh)]

Le snip

I know what you're going through, I'm having something along the same lines happening to me just now.

I picked up a motto today, It's seems like it could help in the future. This motto is "Keep calm and carry on" if things don't go so well (which seems relatively unlikely) just remember that. Also remember that there are plenty other fish in the sea.

Just go at a pace that suits you, don't be blatant about it, subtly suggest that you may really like her and get into a posistion where she asks you about it. At that point just be honest and roll with it. Simples.

 

[Mr S]

I did mention that I am a TERRIBLE flirter simply because I never do it.
Yes I am Dutch by the way, our girls rock but they're hard to get for me.
And what kind of hints, I'm afraid I'm gonna need some examples.
(Told you I was bad at this)

well i don't want to qualify myself as being any good at this myself
but Redlin5 pretty much summed it up

Be natural. Hang out with her, connect with her. Discuss what interests you and what interests her. She'll get the message and it will be very obvious whether she feels the same way or whether she is putting you in the friend zone.

Take her out for dinner if those more subtle methods are ineffective.

the dinner thing is quite good
because you've only known each other a short time it might be difficult to gauge it so far
so to ask her for a meal is subtext
you've not told her you like her
but the act of asking her out to dinner is in itself the straightforward way of telling her without having to tell her
plus so long as you're suave and say the right things, the night out might just win her over

Haha, it's good advice but you've probably already noticed that I'm not very suave, im not subtle (at all!) but apart from that I'm a pretty decent guy

 

[dragonslayer32]

Okay here's what's up. I'm a virgin, have never had a girlfriend before and I've never gone out on a date before.

Now we've got that out of the way, I'm gonna need some advice.
There's this girl I really like at my school, but I don't think that she thinks of me as someone who likes here.
She probably just sees me as some weird guy she talks to, has some fun with.
She is very pretty, I know of at least one other guy who likes her, and she has sort of a dark humor.
She likes it when people trip and stuff so she can point and laugh. That makes her sound like a ***** doesn't it?
Well she's not.

Please anyone? This plea for help especially goes out to the women/girls at the escapist since in my experience, guys mostly say: JUST F****NG KISS HER!!! SHE'LL GET THE MESSAGE!

Don't bother laughing at me, this was a last resort, I've been laughed at before.

Ask her out. trust me, I know how hard it is but think of what it will be like if she says yes. It takes a lot of balls to ask a girl out, especially if you have never had a girlfriend before. I didn't ask a girl out til I was 18 and I regret not doing it earlier because there was a girl I really liked and she moved away when I was 16. You and I sound like the same type of guy, so all I can say is go for it, you don't want to regret it like I do.

 

[supermariner]

I did mention that I am a TERRIBLE flirter simply because I never do it.
Yes I am Dutch by the way, our girls rock but they're hard to get for me.
And what kind of hints, I'm afraid I'm gonna need some examples.
(Told you I was bad at this)

well i don't want to qualify myself as being any good at this myself
but Redlin5 pretty much summed it up

Be natural. Hang out with her, connect with her. Discuss what interests you and what interests her. She'll get the message and it will be very obvious whether she feels the same way or whether she is putting you in the friend zone.

Take her out for dinner if those more subtle methods are ineffective.

the dinner thing is quite good
because you've only known each other a short time it might be difficult to gauge it so far
so to ask her for a meal is subtext
you've not told her you like her
but the act of asking her out to dinner is in itself the straightforward way of telling her without having to tell her
plus so long as you're suave and say the right things, the night out might just win her over

Haha, it's good advice but you've probably already noticed that I'm not very suave, im not subtle (at all!) but apart from that I'm a pretty decent guy

well i'm sure you have your moments
really i'm sure you'll do fine once she's out with you
i know it's cliched, but just be yourself
the more laid back and confident you are about being open in front of her
the more she'll open up (easy boys) and be more at odds around you too
hopefully anyway, every woman is different

 

[Sara Fontaine]

But what would be the correct time to make a move?

Sorry I'm such a pain in the ass btw.

You're not a pain in the ass. This is something I can't really give too much advice with as I don't know you or the lucky girl in question personally, but the general gist of the advice in this thread is to bite the bullet and ask her to go somewhere with you. Maybe for a meal or a movie. You'll be able to gauge quite easily if it's going well or not. Maybe at the end of the meal or movie when you're about to go home, say that you've enjoyed yourself and you'd like to do it again. If she agrees and you're feeling confident enough, maybe go for a hug or a quick kiss on the cheek, whichever you feel more comfortable with. If she returns it, then there's your answer. And don't forget, if it gets to the point of you two going out, there's always the chance that she might make the first move. If she does, don't freak out or start grinning like a madman. Just smile, maybe return the favour (if it was a hug or a kiss) and the rest should flow from then on.

I appear to have messed up the quote somehow... oh well.

 

[esperandote]

Work on your looks, do excercise and dress nice and more clean, loose the worn out clothes, cut and comb your hair and spend some cash on clothing, including underwear.

Other than that dont feel bad if this girls doesn't fall for you, some other random girl will eventually fall sooner or later (sooner if you look good)

 

[maddawg IAJI]

So wait...you're about a little more then a month older then me and you're complaining about being a virgin?

Dude, you're not even 18 yet. In the USA, you wouldn't even be able to buy a pack of cigarettes. I think I should probably point out is that when woman choose to date someone, the last thing they think of is "Oh, has he had sex before." Just be yourself. Have some confidence and an upbeat attitude and just ask her. The worst thing she can say is no, even then, you can still be friends.

 

[Woodsey]

Roofies are your friends.

Tell her you like her I guess. And don't do the, "but I don't want it to fail and never be able to speak to her again!!" thing, because chances are you're talking to her mostly anyway because you want to get on that.

 

[Nannernade]

Well I'd say try to be upfront to her about it but the negative is if it fails you may lose the friendship... maybe if you were to try to incorporate your feelings here and there eventually she'd get the message now I'm not saying kiss her or anything like that, anyway best of luck to you my friend.