Poll: Children or Partner?

[Ben Legend]

Lets say your boyfriend or girlfriend refused to have children, but you wanted to have at least one. Would you stay with them, despite not being able to have children with them, or would you leave them and pursue a relationship with someone else who would want a child.

EDIT: I mean, your partner never wants children, not that your partner doesn't want them at the moment.


EDIT 2: Created a maybe option in the poll at the request of several people.

 

[Hazy]

No, We woulden't Be partners if they refused or if they had different plans then I did. Thats what dating is for, to see if you click.

 

[Vanguard_Ex]

I can't imagine I'd stay with them for the rest of my life if they were completely adamant about not having children and I really wanted one. Hmm. That's a toughy.

 

[Jade Rotaski]

That is hard

If you love that person you have to repect thier needs but you have to respect your own too, try and find a compromise or agree to wait it out.

 

[WrongSprite]

No, We woulden't Be partners if they refused or if they had different plans then I did. Thats what dating is for, to see if you click.

This.

I wouldn't be with a long term parter in the first place if they weren't child minded like myself.

 

[Rigs83]

I plan to never have children myself so it would make no sense to enter a relationship with someone who does or vice versa.

 

[Gooble]

I would probably stay with them; I would certainly like children but I certainly wouldn't need children to be happy with my partner. In the worst case I could just gradually wear them down or deliberately get them pregnant

 

[ace_of_something]

I don't think I'd get far enough to be 'partners' before finding out about something as important as if they want kids. That's why you date first it's the trial phase.

 

[Barefoot_Marine]

I don't think I'd get far enough to be 'partners' before finding out about something as important as if they want kids. That's why you date first it's the trial phase.

Amen to that, I would realise that too many things just aren't gonna work, and even though I'm young (21) and with a girl now, if she didn't, i'd move along fairly quick smart before anyone REALLY gets hurt.

 

[Ben Legend]

But, dating wise, the last thing you would want to bring up is the prospect of children in the future. May scare them off.

 

[Citizen.Erased]

I'd never stay with them, but if they were that adamant about never having children then I don't think we'd be together in the first place.

 

[dwightsteel]

I'm mildly impressed. This isn't an awful question, and I imagine a topic that might yield some interesting discussion. Cheers.


Honestly, it's something that I think I would root out in the beginning of a relationship. Most people don't find it terribly intrusive to be asked whether or not they would want a child down the line. On that note, some people (us guys are especially bad with this) will tell the person they're seeing the thing they want to hear, and then down the road will rescind on the idea.

Personally, I want children in my future. Certainly not immediately, but the idea of being a father a bit later on in my life is a nice thought. I'm honestly not sure if that would be a deal breaker though, especially if I was truly in love with all other facets of her character. Truly a tough question.

 

[TheMatt]

Definitely leave her. Children are a must, I sure as hell ain't mowing my own lawn.

 

[Trivun]

Of course not. I'd love children one day, but if my girlfriend/wife/significant other decided she didn't want kids then I wouldn't mind too much. I'd be disappointed, of course, but I wouldn't end an otherwise happy relationship over it.

 

[fix-the-spade]

Would you stay with them, despite not being able to have children with them,.

Stupid question, doesn't want kids now or doesn't want kids ever?

People's opinions aren't set in stone, five years from now the situation might be different even if they're saying never.

Besides, at 20 why are kids even entering your thought process?

 

[mike1921]

I'd never stay with them, but if they were that adamant about never having children then I don't think we'd be together in the first place.

Why not? You think not wanting to have kids means anything else about them that makes you incompatible? Do you ask every date you get "let's say we were together 5 years, would you be willing to have a kid with me?".

I don't want kids, ever. Also, the thought of getting a girl I love pregnant, her spending 9 months sick and in pain, ending with a possibility of death and an assload of pain, Doesn't sound like something I'd be willing to do or something I'd be willing to break up with said girl for not wanting to do. Maybe it's because I don't see it as "have my baby, I need one and can't stay in the relationship if you don't" I see it as "Hey, push a 7 pound object out of your vag or I'm breaking up with you".

I guess I'd be willing to adopt a child if my long-time GF or wife really really wants one, but it's definitely not something I'd break up with her for either way.

Definitely leave her. Children are a must, I sure as hell ain't mowing my own lawn.

http://img.fsgatelands.com/images/42tg56ni84bjllszb32v.jpg

I don't think I'd get far enough to be 'partners' before finding out about something as important as if they want kids. That's why you date first it's the trial phase.

Amen to that, I would realise that too many things just aren't gonna work, and even though I'm young (21) and with a girl now, if she didn't, i'd move along fairly quick smart before anyone REALLY gets hurt.

Just because they don't want kids a bunch of other things aren't gonna work?

 

[xxDarlenexx]

Yes, because children are a huge deal. It's not that they didn't want to get a boat, it's a living breathing thing. If you want to have a child you shouldn't have to give that up, and if you don't for whatever reason you shouldn't be forced to compromise either. It's an irreconcilable difference and it's best to just go separate ways.

 

[mike1921]

Yes, because children are a huge deal. It's not that they didn't want to get a boat, it's a living breathing thing. If you want to have a child you shouldn't have to give that up, and if you don't for whatever reason you shouldn't be forced to compromise either. It's an irreconcilable difference and it's best to just go separate ways.

You treat relationships as if they were unimportant. There are some people who'd prefer to keep a relationship over getting a child.

 

[Ben Legend]

Would you stay with them, despite not being able to have children with them,.

Stupid question, doesn't want kids now or doesn't want kids ever?

People's opinions aren't set in stone, five years from now the situation might be different even if they're saying never.

Besides, at 20 why are kids even entering your thought process?

Sorry about that, to clear it up, I mean they don't want a child ever.

and... i'm not thinking about having children at the momment, but one day, yeah.

 

[bodyklok]

I wouldn't break up with them, I'd find another woman and seduce her into having my baby's. The I'd lead a double life as the boyfriend/husband to the woman I love and the father to the child I must have.