Poll: Children or Partner?

[ThrobbingEgo]

What if I'm the one who doesn't want children?

 

[Lyri]

Yes, because children are a huge deal. It's not that they didn't want to get a boat, it's a living breathing thing. If you want to have a child you shouldn't have to give that up, and if you don't for whatever reason you shouldn't be forced to compromise either. It's an irreconcilable difference and it's best to just go separate ways.

If they don't want children ever, then this.

Someone else said that peoples opinions aren't even set in stone, and at 21 & 22, myself and My girlfriend respectively.
I want children and she doesn't, but at 22 I'd be surprised if she maintained that mentality for the rest of her life.

If they don't want kids ever, go tell them to tie their tubes, if they don't do that well then.

 

[mike1921]

If they don't want kids ever, go tell them to tie their tubes, if they don't do that well then.

This.

 

[Trace2010]

One MORE thing to talk about with your significant other BEFORE you tie the knot.

 

[Trace2010]

What if I'm the one who doesn't want children?

Find someone with their tubes tied....DUH!!

 

[mike1921]

If they don't want kids ever, go tell them to tie their tubes, if they don't do that well then.

This.

Tubes tying is a far more invasive procedure than snip snip.
Go get your balls nullified.

Fair enough. Also, I plan on getting a vasectomy as soon as I turn 18 (unless the chemo made me infertile, which I hope it did)

 

[ThrobbingEgo]

What if I'm the one who doesn't want children?

Find someone with their tubes tied....DUH!!

So you're saying if the first thing I ask a girl on a date isn't "are you sterile?" I'm doing it wrong?

All these years...

 

[TwistedEllipses]

This one is hard. I would have reluctantly say I would leave them, but I would regret it always....

 

[Citizen.Erased]

I'd never stay with them, but if they were that adamant about never having children then I don't think we'd be together in the first place.

Why not? You think not wanting to have kids means anything else about them that makes you incompatible? Do you ask every date you get "let's say we were together 5 years, would you be willing to have a kid with me?".

I mean, we wouldn't be together as serious partners. I obviously don't ask my dates that on the first night, but if I was considering that the relationship was becoming serious, then yes, I would ask them and no matter how well we got along, I wouldn't stay with them if it was clear for them they didn't want children.

 

[mike1921]

I'd never stay with them, but if they were that adamant about never having children then I don't think we'd be together in the first place.

Why not? You think not wanting to have kids means anything else about them that makes you incompatible? Do you ask every date you get "let's say we were together 5 years, would you be willing to have a kid with me?".

I mean, we wouldn't be together as serious partners. I obviously don't ask my dates that on the first night, but if I was considering that the relationship was becoming serious, then yes, I would ask them and no matter how well we got along, I wouldn't stay with them if it was clear for them they didn't want children.

Doesn't that seem a little cruel to you?

Also, what if they refused to actually have the baby but wouldn't mind adopting one? I've always been curious about that kind of thing .

 

[mike1921]

If they don't want kids ever, go tell them to tie their tubes, if they don't do that well then.

This.

Tubes tying is a far more invasive procedure than snip snip.
Go get your balls nullified.

Fair enough. Also, I plan on getting a vasectomy as soon as I turn 18 (unless the chemo made me infertile, which I hope it did)

It is relatively uncommon in pre-adults for infertility to be permanent.

It is relatively uncommon for 13 year olds to get chemotherapy.

 

[Citizen.Erased]

I'd never stay with them, but if they were that adamant about never having children then I don't think we'd be together in the first place.

Why not? You think not wanting to have kids means anything else about them that makes you incompatible? Do you ask every date you get "let's say we were together 5 years, would you be willing to have a kid with me?".

I mean, we wouldn't be together as serious partners. I obviously don't ask my dates that on the first night, but if I was considering that the relationship was becoming serious, then yes, I would ask them and no matter how well we got along, I wouldn't stay with them if it was clear for them they didn't want children.

Doesn't that seem a little cruel to you?

Also, what if they refused to actually have the baby but wouldn't mind adopting one? I've always been curious about that kind of thing .

Why would it be cruel? I wouldn't stay with someone if we had such obviously different goals in life.

I wouldn't mind adopting a child, but I'd much prefer carrying it myself. I don't see why he would refuse to get me pregnant, but would be keen on adopting.

 

[nathan-dts]

Yes. I'm far to young to be thinging about children, but I don't think I could ignore one of the most basic insticts in humans. I really wouldn't want to get attached to a girl that didn't want children.

 

[Avaholic03]

So we're assuming that:

1. children are the goal of most relationships
2. everyone in a relationship is qualified to have kids
3. people can't change their minds later on in life

I disagree with all of those assumptions. And I wouldn't be in a relationship with someone who absolutely had to have kids.

 

[mike1921]

I'd never stay with them, but if they were that adamant about never having children then I don't think we'd be together in the first place.

Why not? You think not wanting to have kids means anything else about them that makes you incompatible? Do you ask every date you get "let's say we were together 5 years, would you be willing to have a kid with me?".

I mean, we wouldn't be together as serious partners. I obviously don't ask my dates that on the first night, but if I was considering that the relationship was becoming serious, then yes, I would ask them and no matter how well we got along, I wouldn't stay with them if it was clear for them they didn't want children.

Doesn't that seem a little cruel to you?

Also, what if they refused to actually have the baby but wouldn't mind adopting one? I've always been curious about that kind of thing .

Why would it be cruel? I wouldn't stay with someone if we had such obviously different goals in life.

I wouldn't mind adopting a child, but I'd much prefer carrying it myself. I don't see why he would refuse to get me pregnant, but would be keen on adopting.

I'd refuse to get my wife/long time GF pregnant. 9 months of sickness and pain ending with pushing a 7 pound object out of her vag.......not the sorta thing I'd wanna cause unless she was masochistic (and I don't mean the sexual type of masochistic, I mean you hit her in the face with a sledgehammer and she asks you to do it again).

If they don't want kids ever, go tell them to tie their tubes, if they don't do that well then.

This.

Tubes tying is a far more invasive procedure than snip snip.
Go get your balls nullified.

Fair enough. Also, I plan on getting a vasectomy as soon as I turn 18 (unless the chemo made me infertile, which I hope it did)

It is relatively uncommon in pre-adults for infertility to be permanent.

It is relatively uncommon for 13 year olds to get chemotherapy.

Cancer attacks relatively independent of age. So, no, it isn't. Our oncology ward for children is bigger than the one for adults.

I didn't mean it was uncommon compared to adults getting chemo. I meant it was uncommon compared to kids who haven't had it.

Also, just drop this, The chemo possibly leaving me infertile was a side note.

 

[Omikron009]

I would probably be the one refusing to have children. Little buggers.

 

[Julianking93]

No. But if they didn't want kids ever then there wouldn't be much else we would have in common.

 

[Ophiuchus]

Given my hatred towards children, I think it'd be more of a problem if they desperately wanted kids.

But, I dunno, if I'm in a happy relationship I'll do whatever to keep it going so I guess it'd depend on how good we were together.

 

[esperandote]

If she decided not to have children i would dump her. If she wasnt able to have children i would stick with her and look together another way to have children.

 

[traceur_]

That's what cloroform is for

I kid, I kid.

I might stay with her for a while then leave her, it depends on how much I like her.