Poll: Dating older people.

[The_Echo]

My parents are 10 years apart, so I'm cool with going up to 10 years. It's not that weird to me, and generally when I become familiar enough with a person I tend to forget that there's any age gap at all. We're just people.

Ideally, though, I think it would be around or under five years.

 

[FPLOON]

I don't know... and, honestly, I wouldn't care in the slightest...

It was never the age that would bother me, but the clashing personalities that would bound to happen in the long run... I may not be the judgmental, close-minded type... But, I really think my first girlfriend would totally be the opposite of me by being pretty judgmental and a little close-minded, especially after she gets to know me better...

But, then again... I'm not much of a dating person, so that's already strike one on my part... I still say it's not the age, but the personalities that follow... (Although, now that I think about it, those people need to at least be 18 or something if they really want to go for those that are in their 40's and up... Just saying...)

 

[EeveeElectro]

Any older than 4 years and my mum would have a dickie fit.
She's really small minded about relationships...

Unfortunately I don't pick my boyfriends on her basis, so I suppose anyone up to 15 years older?
It depends on the person really, not everyone old acts like it and I've always said you can't choose who you fall in love with.

 

[P.Tsunami]

While I answered I only date people younger than me (because that's been the reality so far), I see little wrong in dating someone older than yourself. Age alone really is just a number, although it may bring with it other factors. If you're happy dating someone fourteen years your senior, have at it.

 

[Yopaz]

I would say 10-15 years is the oldest I could go, probably not much higher than 10 though. For a long term relationship (5 years or more) I would probably limit myself to someone 5 years older though. Mostly because I'd soon end up as a grandfather in my 20's and I'd want different things so if I'm being realistic I wouldn't date someone older than maybe 7 years older. Actually being realistic I wouldn't date at all.

 

[Denamic]

I've no actual limit. Of course, I'm mostly attracted to people around my own age, and not attracted to grandmas at all. But age as a number is not a factor. As long as it feels right, she could be 50 years old for all I care.

 

[Lawnmooer]

I personally, don't really have an issue with age gaps. I don't really pay much attention to them (Though I do seem to favour people who are older than me).

It really just comes down to both parties involved being okay with any differences, since some people are uncomfortable with large age gaps.

I get that there'll be those generation differences that pop up every now and then (Stuff like popular music, old TV shows etc) that can be inconvenient, but luckily for me I spend a lot of my time (Also a lot of my youth) experiencing older things, so I do know a fair bit about music from the 70's+ and various TV shows (I know about things that even my friends whom are ~5 years older than me are too young to have experienced without seeking them out)

 

[Victim of Progress]

I'm 24 and I wouldn't date someone over 30. It's not a number thing. I'm finishing college, I can barely look after myself with a meager job, I share my apartment with my sister... whereas someone over 30 probably has her degree already, a stable job and a lifestyle independent from the restraints I have to deal with.

Agree with you there, mate. The issue isn't so much about the difference in age, as it is in social maturity. If you are in your twenties, you likely are still doing/finishing your education and trying to find a job and a stable home. While your partner, let's say in his or her 30-ies would be established in life already. The older you get, the less of a problem that is, though. That being said, I'd prefer someone 5+/- years older than me. Though I'd prefer if she was younger

 

[Cette]

My general guideline is not more than 5 years younger or older with provisions for stepping outside that for the right person.

Being 30 sadly means women too much older either already have kids or are nearing the point where if they're going to ever have them it's gotta be now. Not that I'm opposed to that in the long run but it's throws some weird potential pressure on right from the beginning.


Too much younger and they tend to not want to be tied down.


That last part came out wrong.

 

[Libra]

I've never dated, but I'd say 10 years older. I tend to find myself attracted to people in their late twenties / early thirties; both concerning looks as well as maturity. I tend to have much more stimulating conversations with them. More Thomas Kuhn and less Justin Bieber.

 

[chinangel]

i'm in a multi-person relationship, and both of my significant others are in their early twenties while i'm on the cusp of 30 (though I look like i'm younger than both of them, and act like i'm 12) soi don't see an issue.

 

[ImperialSunlight]

I'm 19 and I personally don't put much stock in age. Personality matters much more to me. While that may seem easy to say, the reason is less high-and-mighty. It's more or less that I can find men of almost any age attractive sexually. If there were a person in my life that I was attracted to who had a great personality and was also into me, I'd probably date them, as long as they're not younger than 18 or older than maybe 40. Older than 40 is when I start to actually start not being very attracted to a guy. That and he'd be almost as old as my father and that'd be very... awkward.

 

[Robert Marrs]

My rule has is at least 15 years younger than my mom so that would mean no more than 7 years older than me. As far as younger goes I am only 22 so I guess 4 years younger would be the legal limit. I wouldn't feel comfortable dating someone who was still in high school though even if they were 18. Not that it really matters when you think about it. Somebody is not going to suddenly become more mature if they are in high school one month and graduated the next. I guess its just a social stigma thing that would make it weird for me.

 

[Sexual Harassment Panda]

Lots of factors, I guess.

At 27, I'd take a woman in her 30's that is mindful of her health over a woman in her early 20's who smokes and eats like crap... Like I'd take someone older who is fun over someone younger who is an absolute bore. I'm not certain that I'm sold on the ideas of monogamy or mating-for-life either, so... I would probably go older still for the right individual.

 

[Lightknight]

I was a five year range, either direction. Married within three years (she was younger). I really enjoy how much we both remember from our childhood. Occasionally the three years makes a slight gap difference in memories but I can't imagine how bad over 5 years would be with common ground.

When I was in my teens, the range was one or two years either way. Early 20's saw my willingness to date older increase to the 5 year range I held onto but younger got stuck at 18 or older for obvious reasons at the time. Then after college it moved up away from 18.

 

[Eamar]

I'm 22 with a fair amount of experience of living as an adult (lived away from my parents since I was 18, had a job alongside my studies, have lived with a partner, paid rent and bills, that sort of thing), so I could probably see myself with someone into their mid-thirties, but it would totally depend on the person. I imagine it's more likely that the next person I date will also be in their twenties though. I'm not interested in dating anyone younger than me at the moment.

As I said in the other thread though, the way I see it, what two (or more) consenting adults decide to do is none of my business. If you're happy, good for you.

 

[krazykidd]

So we are talking specifically dating? Well then anyone under my mothers age and older than me. So that's a full 31 years old. I'm currently dating a woman 8 years my senior, and have slept with several people between 10-18 years older than me. Actually sleeping with someone twice my age is one of my fantasies, and it get's harder every year. But yeah bAck to dating, iv'e tried younger, and younger girls bore me (18-29 years old). I'm more attracted physically and intellectually to older women, so age only matters if the person is younger than me, as far as dating goes.

Iv'e had this discussion with the older ladies at work, and apparently it happens really often, just that people usually keep it quiet.

 

[Ihateregistering1]

Everyone is different, so there really isn't any sort of "consensus" that can be established, and as far as I'm concerned, feel free to date whoever the hell you want (well, legally of course).

That being said, assuming it's a serious relationship, I do think both people should put some thought into how the age difference might change things as both people get older. With a 14 year age difference, let's say you're 22 and she's 36. That's often quite a bit different than when you're 36 and she's 50, or you're 46 and she's 60.