Poll: Do we nice guys still stand a chance?
- Thread starter Mr S
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Do anyone here honestly believe that the kind of girls that prefer bad apples would admit it?
Or those that consciously believe they don't, but subconsciously do?
There are so much chemistry at work in situations like these, and I don't think any human being have the kind of self insight required to be able to rationally explain or answer the OP's poll correctly.
Or those that consciously believe they don't, but subconsciously do?
There are so much chemistry at work in situations like these, and I don't think any human being have the kind of self insight required to be able to rationally explain or answer the OP's poll correctly.
Saying confidence is politer than saying "Man the fuck up!"Veloxe said:
But seriously, Shy and Confident are pretty contradictory. If you aren't willing to be out there then you aren't going to be seen as a man. And yes women like to date men and they only care about their definition of a man.
If nice means "Never making any sort of advance and counting on the other to initiate anything," yes.
First, there isn't a problem with being a "nice guy". I'm a nice guy and I've managed to land plenty of girlfriends over the years. The problem is that what most people mean when they say "I'm a nice guy" is "I'm meek and timid". Were I to lay out a few simple rules to help people, they'd look something like this. Most of them are obvious:
1) Don't wait for someone to ask you out because you'll be doing quite a bit of waiting.
2) If you are friends with "the perfect girl for you", don't worry about destroying the friendship if you ask them out. The friendship boat already sailed; the best thing to do is, once again, ask them to transition to a new kind of relationship.
3) Don't worry about getting told no. It happens a lot. The damage of a rejection is mild and temporary. Just think of it as narrowing the field of possible soul mates rather than a fundamental rejection of your worth as a human.
4) Be interested in the person you're dating. If you honestly don't care about what kind of day they had, it's probably time to move on.
5) There is no "right place" to meet someone. Particular types of places will tend to attract particular kinds of people which may help with initial vetting.
6) If possible, hold a lengthy conversation with any candidate before asking them on a date. This helps both of you figure out if the other is the sort of person they want to spend more time getting to know. Simply walking up to a woman and asking for a date will rarely go well.
7) For maximum success in asking women out on a date, don't do anything elaborate. Suggest a public place that fosters conversation and leaves both of you with an easy avenue of exit. This is why "coffee dates" are so popular.
1) Don't wait for someone to ask you out because you'll be doing quite a bit of waiting.
2) If you are friends with "the perfect girl for you", don't worry about destroying the friendship if you ask them out. The friendship boat already sailed; the best thing to do is, once again, ask them to transition to a new kind of relationship.
3) Don't worry about getting told no. It happens a lot. The damage of a rejection is mild and temporary. Just think of it as narrowing the field of possible soul mates rather than a fundamental rejection of your worth as a human.
4) Be interested in the person you're dating. If you honestly don't care about what kind of day they had, it's probably time to move on.
5) There is no "right place" to meet someone. Particular types of places will tend to attract particular kinds of people which may help with initial vetting.
6) If possible, hold a lengthy conversation with any candidate before asking them on a date. This helps both of you figure out if the other is the sort of person they want to spend more time getting to know. Simply walking up to a woman and asking for a date will rarely go well.
7) For maximum success in asking women out on a date, don't do anything elaborate. Suggest a public place that fosters conversation and leaves both of you with an easy avenue of exit. This is why "coffee dates" are so popular.
Every time I see these threads I think that whilst I'm "technically" a nice guy I'm also a bit of a prick and not all that nice to people I don't like.
The problem is that most nice guys want bad girls. I know I want a ***** that looks good in black leather, and of course looks like Power Girl.
Being a lazy fat manchild however, I get to console myself with the myth that nice guys never get the girl rather than actually put any effort into getting one.
The problem is that most nice guys want bad girls. I know I want a ***** that looks good in black leather, and of course looks like Power Girl.
Being a lazy fat manchild however, I get to console myself with the myth that nice guys never get the girl rather than actually put any effort into getting one.
i had the exact same problem, except that my bestfriend was the jerk to the girls, so all the girls i liked went for him, dont get me wrong i love him dearly (in a hetrosexual kinda way) but he kept stealing the girls i liked. but now 2 years later all the girls that classed me as the nice guy and the friend are starting to come to me, one actually called me the perfect guy because of my friendly manner, so dont fret man, it'll happen 
Confidence, my friend.
The people who often say that "nice guys lose" are referring to nice people who simply lack confidence. In which case, that's kinda the truth. However, you can always fix confidence, so not all hope is lost! Gain some confidence (easier said than done, I know), and then you'll be fine.
It's worth noting that my girlfriend complains about other girls ignoring nice guys when I think that it's a load of bull. World is slowly turning upside down.
The people who often say that "nice guys lose" are referring to nice people who simply lack confidence. In which case, that's kinda the truth. However, you can always fix confidence, so not all hope is lost! Gain some confidence (easier said than done, I know), and then you'll be fine.
It's worth noting that my girlfriend complains about other girls ignoring nice guys when I think that it's a load of bull. World is slowly turning upside down.
i'm a nice guy, so to speak. i have not been a douche to any of my girlfriends, and have not been in a relationship that lasted less than a year at least, and my current one is going well.
if you be a douche to woman, you are a douche. if it somehow works, you are a douche with a woman, thats the only difference. be yourself, there will be a girl out there somewhere for you
if you be a douche to woman, you are a douche. if it somehow works, you are a douche with a woman, thats the only difference. be yourself, there will be a girl out there somewhere for you
Come on.
I think you "nice guys" need to take some responsibility here. Nice guys don't get passed up for jerks IF they are interesting and engaging. I bet nice guys who are interesting get lots of attention from girls. You have to consider the possibility that the nice guys who are complaining about getting passed up for jerks are just not interesting to the girls they are trying to date.
"Nice" is so subjective anyway. If you're a guy who thinks, "Yea, I'm a nice guys," chances are everyone else think you're a bore. "Nice" is one the most uninteresting and light adjectives to describe a person, it's what you say when you can't think of anything else to say. It's not enough to be just "nice," you have to be interesting and probably a lot of other stuff too. If "nice" is the prevailing word people associate you with, face it, you are probably not very interesting, and that's why girls pass you up.
I think you "nice guys" need to take some responsibility here. Nice guys don't get passed up for jerks IF they are interesting and engaging. I bet nice guys who are interesting get lots of attention from girls. You have to consider the possibility that the nice guys who are complaining about getting passed up for jerks are just not interesting to the girls they are trying to date.
"Nice" is so subjective anyway. If you're a guy who thinks, "Yea, I'm a nice guys," chances are everyone else think you're a bore. "Nice" is one the most uninteresting and light adjectives to describe a person, it's what you say when you can't think of anything else to say. It's not enough to be just "nice," you have to be interesting and probably a lot of other stuff too. If "nice" is the prevailing word people associate you with, face it, you are probably not very interesting, and that's why girls pass you up.
Nice as a word itself is kind of interesting.
It originally meant foolish or stupid. Then it changed meanings to timid or delicate, then precise or careful, then vaguely agreeable to just plain "nice" now
You sure you want to be all that?
It originally meant foolish or stupid. Then it changed meanings to timid or delicate, then precise or careful, then vaguely agreeable to just plain "nice" now
You sure you want to be all that?
Oooh! Nummy F'taghn munch!Ladette said:And that is the hardest i've laughed today, epic lulz indeed. You get a cookie.Nerf Ninja said:
That rings a lot truer than some guys would like to believe.