Poll: Ever been in Love?
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Broke up with my girlfriend of 21 months. Alas it turned out that it was not meant to be. And her parents were really restrictive >.<
not really, extreme sexual desire yes...but i think love is someone who you spend time with for as long as you want and not having to actually talk to enjoy each others company.
I'm as in love as I reckon I could be without actually being in a relationship. I really need to figure out whether a relationship with the girl in question would work, because it's tearing me to bits constantly thinking about her and as a result hating myself for not doing anything about my feelings.
I'm currently 5 months into a kickass relationship with the most awesome girl in the history of ever.
So yes, I'm in love at the moment.
It's also my first ever relationship (I was 22 at the time it started). Unless something really stupid happens, or one of us is forced to move really far away, I can see this relationship going for a very very long time. We have almost identical interests (she's way more into anime than me, though), and we have a lot of other things in common. Plus, just being together makes us happy.
So yes, I'm in love at the moment.
It's also my first ever relationship (I was 22 at the time it started). Unless something really stupid happens, or one of us is forced to move really far away, I can see this relationship going for a very very long time. We have almost identical interests (she's way more into anime than me, though), and we have a lot of other things in common. Plus, just being together makes us happy.
This. So this. My GF and I are not totally in tune yet...but we're pretty darn close. It's also helped by the fact that we are so ridiculously similar in almost everything. I think the only think we disagree on aggressively is the fact that I enjoy melted cheese dishes (pizza, lasagna, etc), and she cannot stand it.Kermi said:
This sums it up, god damn I love you Perry Cox. Yes, I most definately believe in love though I have never experienced it myself and am highly pessimistic in regard to my chances of finding it. But I believe in it and wether it takes me 1 year or 100 I have a feeling that someday I'll fall in love, or at least I hope so.
Not exactly what I meant. The full question was "Is the only difference between the two is that you sleep together" sort of thing. My point was that, yes, by definition, my boyfriend is a best friend that I'm physically affectionate with, it feels like there's more to it than that.Mr.K. said:
No, and I'm not entirely sure it exists beyond a surge of chemicals in the brain that eventually fades over time. It's better to date people whose interests you share and with whom you feel comfortable and can be yourself. Those, in my experience, are the relationships that last. But I'm also a cynic with daddy issues according to the psychologist I used to date, so maybe I'm not the best authority on this.
Surge of chemicals triggered by a thought of your partner is just what love is, the trick is to keep things fresh enough that it never completely goes away, love isn't just always there it actually takes alot of work.high_castle said:
People who share your interest will annoy you less so you wont need as much dopamine to tolerate them, but then again things might get stale alot faster and they become meaningless.
In the end it's all a crap-shoot, you find someone exciting and try to make it work, if it doesn't you move on.
I'm sorry, but I just laughed when I read this and the others like it.keelzbunny said:
I think some people's cynicism has gone a full 180 and turned into naiveté.
OT: Yes, I am in love and no it won't work out. Fuuuuuuuuuuuuun.
Never. To the extreme that I don't feel "love" or affection towards even my family or friends.
I've had many crushes (the first at the age of 5), and I've felt traces of the feeling of love before, but it fades extremely quickly (in a matter of seconds). Though I've never met someone that I feel could be my companion, ally, and lover. The distance is always too great, even though I spend all of my social time in circles where I should feel the most at home.
I know something is wrong, but I don't know what. Whenever I try to think about it, I go around in circles or fall into a cruel depression. Meanwhile I grow more distant every day.
But I haven't given up hope. For hope is the feeling that drives me forward. Hope that, despite the absolutely ridiculous odds, I will meet someone to connect with for a lifetime.
I've had many crushes (the first at the age of 5), and I've felt traces of the feeling of love before, but it fades extremely quickly (in a matter of seconds). Though I've never met someone that I feel could be my companion, ally, and lover. The distance is always too great, even though I spend all of my social time in circles where I should feel the most at home.
I know something is wrong, but I don't know what. Whenever I try to think about it, I go around in circles or fall into a cruel depression. Meanwhile I grow more distant every day.
But I haven't given up hope. For hope is the feeling that drives me forward. Hope that, despite the absolutely ridiculous odds, I will meet someone to connect with for a lifetime.
I've been in love with the same man for four years now. He knows what I need, and he listens when I say things. He doesn't understand me perfectly, but no one really does. He has habits I don't like and views I don't agree with, but with every fiber of my being I love him. The sight of his smile and the color of his eyes are like warm breezes in June. The thought of him brings butterflies like stars swooping through my heart. And even though he is far away most of the time, I speak with him every day, and the sound of his voice has me glowing like the sun. He loves me. Love is beautiful and complicated, but is simply surmised in that you make each other happy and keep each other warm.
I know it sounds emotional and ridiculous and fuzzy-wuzzy, but it' true. There is no perfection in love, love is not a completion of the self, love is not a loss of the self. Love is deep and strengthening and good and warm. It is not the very essence of perfection distilled from on high. It's human and visceral and it keeps you. It is a candle that lights darkness, even when you aren't afraid of the dark.
I know it sounds emotional and ridiculous and fuzzy-wuzzy, but it' true. There is no perfection in love, love is not a completion of the self, love is not a loss of the self. Love is deep and strengthening and good and warm. It is not the very essence of perfection distilled from on high. It's human and visceral and it keeps you. It is a candle that lights darkness, even when you aren't afraid of the dark.
Love? What's that? Maybe I am, maybe not, I don't know what it's like.
Maybe you can tell me, hmm?
Once upon a time I was in elementary school (grades 1 - 6), we had a kinda special group. Normally they break up the class into several different schools after sixth grade, but they kept us together all the way through secondary school (grades 7 - 9) as well. So we had a little more "cohesion" than normal groups. So there was a girl, from 5th grade onwards I felt I kinda liked her, never said anything of COURSE. When we left ninth grade I KNEW I liked her, but I didn't think I was good enough to say anything. She wasn't posh or anything, but I was a little bit of a ragdoll. SO: we lived in the same neighborhood(ish), sometimes on our way to (or from) our respective schools we would pass each other by, and whenever we did she would always smile and wave, and I had to laugh. Seeing her kinda made my day, very rarely would anyone wave enthusiasctically (or at least it seemed like she did) when I saw them, and so on.
But then we moved "conveniently" out of the way so I really never saw her again.
BUT: over the next 8 years I would occasionally run in to her unexpectedly. Very rarely though, sometimes a couple years would go by. But every time it happened we would talk, and then she would disappear again and I would always wonder if I ever saw her again. Because she never left my mind, for 8 years people kinda came and went but SHE always stuck, in my mind that is. Get this: one day I get a letter from one of the girls, they are gonna have a class reunion. I never thought they would actually arrange it but there it was. I didn't want to be THE example of a failure that they perhaps expected, so I didn't go. But I knew she was gonna be there and now I'm wondering if I made a mistake! So then I run into her in the library and ONCE AGAIN we talk, she disappears.....shit. I panic for a week, but then I get an idea: facebook to the rescue and I guess she's the only reason I'm on facebook. A few messages back and forth but DAMN is she a lazy facebook user! Ok, so it's do or die time, she can't escape from me this time, but after eight years....what's it worth? To her?
So there's my dilemma. Come on people I went through the trouble of writing this, I deserve something in return!!
Everything above is true and I am serious.
Maybe you can tell me, hmm?
Once upon a time I was in elementary school (grades 1 - 6), we had a kinda special group. Normally they break up the class into several different schools after sixth grade, but they kept us together all the way through secondary school (grades 7 - 9) as well. So we had a little more "cohesion" than normal groups. So there was a girl, from 5th grade onwards I felt I kinda liked her, never said anything of COURSE. When we left ninth grade I KNEW I liked her, but I didn't think I was good enough to say anything. She wasn't posh or anything, but I was a little bit of a ragdoll. SO: we lived in the same neighborhood(ish), sometimes on our way to (or from) our respective schools we would pass each other by, and whenever we did she would always smile and wave, and I had to laugh. Seeing her kinda made my day, very rarely would anyone wave enthusiasctically (or at least it seemed like she did) when I saw them, and so on.
But then we moved "conveniently" out of the way so I really never saw her again.
BUT: over the next 8 years I would occasionally run in to her unexpectedly. Very rarely though, sometimes a couple years would go by. But every time it happened we would talk, and then she would disappear again and I would always wonder if I ever saw her again. Because she never left my mind, for 8 years people kinda came and went but SHE always stuck, in my mind that is. Get this: one day I get a letter from one of the girls, they are gonna have a class reunion. I never thought they would actually arrange it but there it was. I didn't want to be THE example of a failure that they perhaps expected, so I didn't go. But I knew she was gonna be there and now I'm wondering if I made a mistake! So then I run into her in the library and ONCE AGAIN we talk, she disappears.....shit. I panic for a week, but then I get an idea: facebook to the rescue and I guess she's the only reason I'm on facebook. A few messages back and forth but DAMN is she a lazy facebook user! Ok, so it's do or die time, she can't escape from me this time, but after eight years....what's it worth? To her?
So there's my dilemma. Come on people I went through the trouble of writing this, I deserve something in return!!
Everything above is true and I am serious.
Yes, but she already had a boyfriend. Some time after she had broke up with him, I invited her to my place for a movie night, hoping to turn it into a date.
She came with her new boyfriend.
She came with her new boyfriend.
True, true. But I also believe there has to be some sort of willingness and trust on both parties' part to "fall in love" so to speak. I don't believe in love-at-first-sight or fairytales, which is what I was trying (and likely failing) to convey in my post.Mr.K. said: