thewatergamer said:
...but you guys/girls know which feminists I'm talking about.
I assume you mean militant misandrists who erroneously self-identify as feminists despite demonstrating none of that ideology's tenets. They're actually fairly rare, and the great majority of them are actually windmills and men made entirely of straw, but every now and then one slips out of the woodwork to pour fuel on everyone's confirmation biases.
thewatergamer said:
...but some people my find certain races or features in a potential sexual partner more attractive then other feautres
Some people? All people. All people find certain things attractive, and unattractive. It's when you take a tiny pool of anecdotal experience and extrapolate it to cover an entire race, or gender, or sexuality, or creed, that you find yourself getting into heavily prejudicial territory. And as discussed, when you apply negative prejudice to someone for reasons of race, you are by definition being racist. This makes people uncomfortable, because people HATE to be called an -ist, regardless of whether or not the term exactly matches their behavior. So folks will run themselves ragged trying to redefine the term and/or attach a million conditions to it.
Here's a good piece of advice that everyone should take to heart. You are not the protagonist of the world. You are not the "good guy", even if you're generally a good guy. At some point in your life, perhaps many points, you are going to be the villain in someone else's story. You are going to be the asshole. You are going to think, and feel, shitty things. Accept it, and deal with it, and work to change/better yourself if you feel you must. Little bit racist in your dating preferences? If that bothers you, just work on it. Don't try and re-define a word so you come out smelling like the rose you imagine yourself to be.