Poll: My Love Triangle Help!!!
- Thread starter UpSkirtDistress
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If he had feelings for his girlfriend, he could just tell the other girl "no" and she could move on with her life. If he had feelings for the other girl, he could break up with his girlfriend so she could move on with her life. If he stays with his girlfriend, keeping girl #2 around as a "backup plan," he's not really committed himself to either girl. By definition, they're both being strung along.Lord_Panzer said:
That's totally selfish, irresponsible, heartless, and uncool. You can't just treat people like contingency plans. Be with someone for someone, or leave them because you're not into them. Don't string them along.
Think about it for a sec. You knew the other girl first, and it was just on and off. You never went any farther then that. Then you met the girl you're currently dating and you did stat going out with her. You had the chance with this other girl, but something happened and it didn't go through. As far as I'm concerned this is just the brain wanting something it can't/shouldn't have. Out of principal, though, I will not vote in this poll.
Hmmm, you make a good point, Freud. I'm so used to people like numbers it hadn't really occurred to me. I suppose that's what one gets when one asks The Internet for relationship advice.ThrobbingEgo said:
Is it not possible to consider i have feelings for both. I've said no to girl 2 before but she is still a really good friend so will be part of my life. She isn't exactly waiting around for me she lives her own life. She is an individual not my back up plan. I love my girlfriend ,really i do whether you believe it or not, but i just have feeling for this other girl. At this stage of my relationship i'm just beginning to think maybe there is more out there in the world but i'm afraid to do anything in case i lose her forever which is not what i wantThrobbingEgo said:
Personally, whoever makes you the happiest. I voted for other chick namely because you listed several negative qualities about your girlfriend and really none about the other girl, but throw away all the history and such, and whoever makes you more happy and who you honestly want to be with.
It's possible you have feelings for both - but nothing as certain as love for either. Why? Because you're asking complete strangers for their opinion over whether you should dump your girlfriend or not. When you have to make a commitment, which way are you going to roll? You seem indifferent and unable to choose.UpSkirtDistress said:
Do you "love" your girlfriend because of her, or because she's there?
I thought you were quoting someone famous, but Google says you weren't (not exactly anyway). That shit is deep, brah.meatloaf231 said:
I would pick the other girl. You're only 19, it's not like the relationship will last forever anyway, since you're already having feelings for another girl. When that happens, it's time to break up and move on.
You make a harsh but ascute point.ThrobbingEgo said:
Edit: I don't agree with everything you,ve said though, alot of it is harsh speculation but based on the info given seems the most logical conclusion to draw if you knew the full story perhaps you'd think differently.
Let's go with "a combination of passion, intimacy, and commitment - with a good helping of respect." I'm simplifying here but you also want to be, on an important level, equals with your significant other. That's why you call your romantic interests "partners" afterall.Sewblon said:
I hope you can't say that for chocolate and your computer.
That's "Astute."UpSkirtDistress said:
I'm the kind of guy that sits in my underground doom bunker all day and thinks of survival plans while not installing miniguns and gas turbine engines into my car, so I'd pretend this is a choose your own adventure book and develop a contingency plan.
The worst choice here is to choose one definitively over the other, as you seem to suggest is the only option, as that would give you a 50/50 chance of hitting it off great or being all by your lonesome at square 1 if you botch anything. Breaking up with your current girl would produce this effect, as the rejection would ruin any future chance you have with her.
I would continue to see your original girl, and if it works out, then hey, you made the right choice. But it would also be wise to stay close to Girl #2, just close enough to keep her in a state of interest, so that if at any point you botch your relationship with Girl #1 you can fall back on #2.
Furthermore, if you later choose #2 over #1, you should be sure to break up with #1 under harsh, stressful circumstances not connected to your relationship, so that if you decide you want to to get back with #1 after hooking up with #2 you have some material to bullshit your way back into her life with. "I lost my job and my dog died and I was addicted to Heroine pity me!" will do a lot more for your chances than "Yeah so the sex got boring."
If you're really slick, you can just marry each one and then move to Indonesia.
You could always just stop whoring yourself around. You can't just play both of them, that's jacked up. But, if you have a good thing going, than you shouldn't feel the need to pursue anybody else.
And you really should be glad that your girlfriend isn't an alchoholic party monster, she sounds pretty lenient to let you have such a close relationship with this other chick. If your so close to her and her family than why even consider doing this? You say that you're still very happy with the way things are between you and her, I know that people always expect something better is passing it by, but please just be rational in your decision....
I know whats best for you...
And you really should be glad that your girlfriend isn't an alchoholic party monster, she sounds pretty lenient to let you have such a close relationship with this other chick. If your so close to her and her family than why even consider doing this? You say that you're still very happy with the way things are between you and her, I know that people always expect something better is passing it by, but please just be rational in your decision....
I know whats best for you...
I'm sorry but it seems if you even felt the need to post this that inside you know what you really want, I believe its the other girl. If you were truly happy with your current girlfriend there would be no trouble therefore no need to post. So I say give yourself a chance at a happier situation and take the leap.
Or you can do what Jonathan Rhys Meyers did in Match Point...300lb. Samoan said:
Marry your girlfriend while secretly having an affair with the other woman, wait until the mistress is pregnant, promise to leave your girlfriend for her, but then murder her and make it look like a botched robbery. Flip a coin to see if you get away with it.