SkarKrow said:
I'll agree to an extent, it isn't psychology alone and other factors play a part in it, I and others have said exercise and better diet help to deal with it for example, positive mental attitude is something a lot of people say to me without thinking it through, on particularly bad days thinking about tomorrow makes me want to curl up and die, confidence is something that's difficult to summon and maintain in day to day life let alone during an episode.
Don't get me wrong, I wasn't trying to be one of those people that just mindlessly say "cheer up" or "hang in there" - I was suggesting you to do something specific about it; I was literally asking you to rethink your life but to try and fight your inclination to view each event in your life so far negatively while you did so. That's something I remember doing when I was at my lowest, and it lead me to have a major epiphany that turned my life around. It's not easy, I know, and what worked for me may not work for you.
Stress is also considered a trigger and that could be why I feel this way, since I'm currently in the process of leaving university partway through and trying to find a new path through life that won't leave me without two pennies to rub together.
The general structure of society doesn't help, with a lot of emphasis on work and career, but to have either of those you need education, and education is a daunting and expensive process, at least here in the UK and I'm told the US.
But it also locks you into things and that terrifies me.
(I was studying education to be a teacher btw, way too high of a workload and I failed a placement because of stress breaking me.)
That sounds like a very similar situation I was in when I was at the low point I described above. I spent 4 years getting my associate's degree and took another year and a half off of college simply because I didn't know what I wanted to major in, what I wanted my career to be, etc. In my case, I ended up doing a combination of things including internet research on careers, talking to a lot of people about it, looking around for problems in the world that I wanted to help solve, etc. Ultimately, it ended up being a philosophical issue of not only what I wanted out of life, but what I felt the most serious/significant problem was to me personally. It ended up being profound loneliness and the meaninglessness of life, a realization brought on by the very absurdity of the situation both you and I are in. Most people spend their lives doing soul-destroying work just so they can survive, perhaps earn some material comforts, until they die; others obliviously commit themselves to whatever social or scientific problem is fashionable to deal with at the time while avoiding their own philosophical questions about the greater meaning of life, and still others study one thing or another - no subject seemingly interesting enough to devote one's entire existence to. With these sorts of people being the ones giving you and I advice, it's pretty damn understandable that you'd be terrified at your prospects - I know I was. I decided to make my life about bringing these sorts of huge profound issues to the conscious attention of as many people as would listen and working with them to do something about it. To that end, I chose to return to school on track to become a philosophy professor, but there are undoubtedly other paths one can take. What you should consider are your most profound concerns, even if they don't seem to translate well into a career at first, and find a way to put yourself in a position where you will be able to meet like-minded persons.
Retail therapy helps to but that might just be me, I bought a load of retro stuff the other day and it cheered me up. Then guilt. Also spent about £600. Now I'm mad at me.
I'm willing to admit that therapy may work in some cases, at least in the short term. Based on your story it seems that you'd agree that it doesn't ever really address the root problem though, so you're always at risk for a resurgence of those negative experiences. Thus you can either go to therapy throughout your life, or work to confront those problems yourself with the help of friends who share similar suffering and maintain some hope that they will be resolved eventually.
