Poll: What console would Jesus play?

[Hashime]

I think a more appropriate question is what kind of game would Jesus play? I think a lot of people on here are confusing God the Creator and Jesus Son of God, which mucks up the issue. Jesus isn't a The Sims or Civilization kind of person. Jesus is more of a practical morality figure. That said, I see Jesus playing RPG and Open World games where you have more freedom to choose your character's path. And of course, he would choose the most evil path and get the character's life all messed up just to prove a point about it.

So with that said, I see Jesus playing XBox360. Why? Because it's a lot easier to make His point when you have a large multiplayer base made up of adolescent young homophobes. I leave it to you all to sort out the nuances of that last part.

Nice, that is much better than my reasoning. I agree.

 

[Icarion (aka Stockholm)]

Y'all fools. He would obviously play the Sega Genesis!

I see what you did there.
OT:The PC because it's omnipotent [sub][sub]what? I'm not biased[/sub][/sub] Also because it has god mode for everything. And we all know that a son tries to emulate his father...

 

[Dana22]

Jesus would play Amiga CD32.

 

[Alon Shechter]

An MMORPG, he will start a guild that will grow to be huge and rule the virtual universe of said MMO.

 

[tombman888]

He would probably meld them all into a single console and play them at the same time.

 

[Steampunk Viking]

I will have to say the Nintendo DS. Why? I don't think Jesus would appreciate Sony or Microsoft games, you look at the evidence, Metal Gear Solid, a Playstation exclusive, deals with cloning. It's against God and nature! He'd steer clear of that. Then you go to XBox exclusives like Gears of War for example deals with killing Locusts, technically God's creation, and things like Call of Duty: Black Ops, Halo, it's all violence. For this reason, I reckon he'd be on the fence with PC games. That means that XBox 360, Playstation 3, PSP and PC are out of the running.

So this leaves the Wii and DS, the happy family image that Nintendo portrays would appeal to Jesus I reckon. But here's the dialemma, he's playing Cooking Mama on the Wii, and a Leper needs curing. Does he continue playing or does he leave his Carpenter Shop to help them?

Not a problem with a DS!

Therefore, DS wins, he can continue drawing his apples on Art Academy on the way to the said Leper in need. No need to stop, run up, quick pause on the game, MIRACLE, then back to drawing dem apples.

Nintendo DS. Chosen by Jesus.

 

[132635]

the wiipsc360. i went there

 

[Vhite]

He doesnt need a console.

 

[Sebenko]

PC. But he'd have emulators for every platform, and he'd only play multiplayer, as a medic, and he'd be on everyone's team, but would never get any teamkills.

 

[Kouen]

PSP, Handhelds wise he wouldn't have the time for pointless minigames and casual stuff

Otherwise PC

 

[Daveman]

Obviously the PS2, the greatest console ever sent by God to make it up to us for all that nonsense his buddy the church has been saying.

 

[Trilbi]

The PlayStation 7. Cookie for anyone who gets it.

 

[JoJo]

Probably the Wii, as he'd want something family-friendly for the kids...

 

[Spoon E11]

he obviosly plays xbox and 360. Just for the halo series.

 

[Daedalus1942]

The original oscilloscope that Pong was invented on.
You know it to be true!
-Tabs<3-

 

[GeneticallyModifiedDucks]

I'll say PC...he can build a giant monolith computer and play any game in the world...+ mods.

Crysis would look humble when confronted with the almight PC of Jesus.

 

[Angry Robot]

PC. But he'd have emulators for every platform, and he'd only play multiplayer, as a medic, and he'd be on everyone's team, but would never get any teamkills.

Lol very true, altho I'd say he'd strap a virtual boy to his head as he's probably the only person who could use it for an extended amount of time without becoming terribly incapacitated.

 

[Super Toast]

The Wii, because it has fewer ridiculously violent games. (fewer, not none)

 

[John the Gamer]

He wouldn't be able to play anyways. There'd be too many fanatical (christians)followers and extremist muslim/jewish assassins stalking him all the time.

Something like this, but more modern. And without the mother, I guess.

Spoiler

 

[Angus565]

Jesus has his own consoles.
When at home he plays the PSWii60,
and on the go he plays the DSP.