Poll: why can't students love their teachers?

[NightmareExpress]

It's more for the sake of professionalism in the "workplace".
In the school environment, a student's job is to learn and a teacher's job is fairly self explanatory.
If the two were to have intimate relations, it would likely affect their ability to do their job as well as they could.
I believe doctors have the same thing going with their patients, to some degree.

As for whether or not "it's wrong", that would be debatable depending on who you're talking to.
If it's two mature adults, I don't see anything out of the ordinary. If the student was young and still in the process of growing up, then I could see the definite wrong in it. It would be an abuse of authoritative power on the teacher's part.

 

[blazearmoru]

I believe that there is nothing wrong with student teacher relationships BUT because we're human and prone to fuckups, it leaves too much room for problems. It's not the student-teacher reationship that is the problem, it's all the other shit that comes along with it.

 

[dagens24]

It shouldn't be illegal as long as the student is of a legally consenting age. They should, however, be fired regardless of the age of the student; they are in a position of authority where their relationship creates a conflict of interest.

 

[vgmaster831]

...

Well, power balance have already been mentioned as the reason.

There's no reason it couldn't be adapted to become a closer fit to that reasoning though, by ensuring that prosecution could only take place with the consent of the victim's legal guardians. That way, power would remain with the student/parents, while the government would not be forcing itself into the bedrooms of student/teacher relationships which all parties concerned were perfectly fine with.

The problem is that rape is a capital crime, and it's not actually the victim or the parents prosecuting the rapist, it's the state. Changing that precedent could lead to people not getting prosecuted after committing really heinous crimes for a variety of reasons.

Then define a consensual student/teacher relationship as something else - in a different penal code article - and make prosecution under that article subject to student approval.

It is certainly possible for a student to be taken advantage of and not think they are being taken advantage of. Hell, adults get into unhealthy relationships like that all the time. As a society, we need to protect minors. It was said before, 18 is an arbitrary number, but there needs to be a threshold of some kind. Statutory rape is still rape, because children lack the ability to make an informed decision to consent. I think some adults don't really form opinions well, and I know some children perfectly capable of making informed choices. Like I said, there needs to be a line somewhere.

 

[someonehairy-ish]

Because we have to set a limit and teacher's aren't supposed to fuck students? That teacher's may be preying on student's in these situations.

Yes 18 is arbitrary. As arbitrary as 16 or 20 or 21. We must decide on a limit and we decided on 18. Deal with it.

Speak for yourself. It's 16 here.

Yeah the teachers might be preying on them, or the feelings may be mutual. If the student feels forced then it's constitutional rape and illegal anyway, but if the student consents... I don't see what's wrong there.

Also, please stop putting apostrophes in plurals. They don't go there.

 

[Vivi22]

EDIT:Not to mention the whole part about the power balance.

This is the big part of it, and also has to do with why the age of majority is considered the limit in many places (with reasonable exceptions in many countries which aren't the US. Their statutory rape laws are absurd and completely backward and immoral in some ways).

Adults in general, but teachers especially are in a position of authority over children/students. How do we know that someone who's underage is in a consensual relationship with someone and not being taken advantage of (either because they're young and naive or because the teacher has threatened them)? The reality is that we can't, and even if the child says it's consensual, it really might not be. They may be lying, or they may have been manipulated into having sex with their teacher. So instead of trying to take it on a case by case basis and do the near impossible of proving a crime has taken place, we instead err on the side of caution until someone is considered an adult for the sake of protecting children from harm and punishing those who would take advantage of them.

 

[Loonyyy]

1) Unprofessional. It's a conflict of interest.

2) Often criminal, if the student isn't of the age of consent.

You couldn't answer this for yourself?

 

[Gigano]

...
It is certainly possible for a student to be taken advantage of and not think they are being taken advantage of. Hell, adults get into unhealthy relationships like that all the time. As a society, we need to protect minors. It was said before, 18 is an arbitrary number, but there needs to be a threshold of some kind. Statutory rape is still rape, because children lack the ability to make an informed decision to consent. I think some adults don't really form opinions well, and I know some children perfectly capable of making informed choices. Like I said, there needs to be a line somewhere.

Which is where the parents come into the picture. If a 16 year old boy is indeed being taken advantage of by his 23 year old teacher, they can approve of prosecution even against the boy's will, because they're his legal guardians. If both the boy and parents are fine with the relationship, then it really isn't any of society's business.

A threshold is needed, but there's no reason to not make it as flexible as can be, while still serving its purpose. Student approval for prosecution ensures that victimless crimes are not prosecuted, while granting the power and protection of the law to the student.

 

[Not Matt]

well.........i can understand it when the student is underage or the age gap is too large. but the 21 year old student and the 24 year old teacher sounds okay with me(as long as it wasn't abuse ofcorse). could even be a cute couple. think it's a crime because it is sort of like excepting a bribe or black mailing the student in to doing it. BUT! if the student and the teacher is in love (and both in an age group that's appropriate) then i have to support team love.

 

[kyuzo3567]

It's probably been said already but I don't want to read through three pages.
It's illegal until the student is 18+, after that the only issue I think anyone should have is whether or not the student is directly under the teachers' influence. Basically you can sleep with your prof in university, but it shouldn't be allowed while you are taking his course and he can manipulate or doctor your grades. Once you're no longer under direct influence then go right ahead

 

[RedDeadFred]

Because teachers are instructors and it's hard to retain professionalism with someone you're boinking, not mentioning that said boink-y would likely receive special treatment.

This. It's a conflict of interest if the "boink-y" does poorly on an assignment. Also, if there's a miserable breakup, it's not fair to the student because the teacher is obviously going to have some bias against them.

 

[Mr F.]

Oh for fucks sake.

This argument is not even about the age of consent. Teachers are in a position of power over their students and as a result should not be fucking them, regardless of how old they are. That is the long and the short of it. If they are star crossed lovers then they can keep their junk in their respective pants for a couple of years until they graduate.

Thats just how it goes. If a lecturer at Uni slept with one of their pupils it would still be frowned upon (And quite rightly). And as for shit in high schools... Well, that is just borderline creepy.

Going through a few posts and it seems a lot of people agree with me. Which is good.

Its simple enough. Dont fuck your pupils cause if you do you might end up fucking your teaching career. Even if you are in love, what if they happen to be shit at exams? You failing them could fuck up your relationship, you not failing them could fuck up your career and their prospects. No matter what, shit will still get confused.

 

[MetalMagpie]

Duty of care. There's a power imbalance there, which poses a serious problem. Various jobs have rules against dating someone of less standing without the company, it's not unusual.

Basically this. In the UK, it's generally regarded as an abuse of authority. It's far too easy for the teacher to use their position to their advantage, even without meaning to.

In addition, there's the same conflict of interests that occurs when people date their boss. How is a teacher supposed to treat all of their students fairly when they're having a relationship with one of them?

I'm not saying it's not possible for teacher-student relationships to be completely free of abuse/conflict. But it's not much to ask that teachers at least wait until the kid they fancy finishes school.

> yes if the student is 15 or youner
> no if the student is 16 or older

Maybe I'm being thick, but what's the difference between those two options?

 

[Angie7F]

I think that if you are attracted there is nothing you can do to stop it.
However, you should never s@@t where you eat.
Regardless of whether you are a teacher or working in an office, you should stay away from stuff like that.

 

[Keith K]

If it's not statutory rape, then it's an obvious conflict of interest.

 

[Talaris]

Had to pick yes in the poll, as the 18 age limit was not an option. Once you are officially an adult I think it's fine, after all at 18 you are believed to be mature enough to make your own decisions, and that should include within relationships.

 

[Thaluikhain]

> yes if the student is 15 or youner
> no if the student is 16 or older

Maybe I'm being thick, but what's the difference between those two options?

Age of consent, if they are under 16 it's illegal. Which renders the whole thing irrelevant, it's like asking if gay couples should get be allowed to get married if one of them is 8 years old, a horse and dead.

 

[Lionsfan]

Every so often you'll hear about some teacher or NFL cheerleader getting throw in jail cause she made love to high school student somewhere. my question is though, why is this even a crime? i read a story once about a 24 year old teacher getting jail time for sleeping with her 21 year old student. I'm not saying that i want to see people sleeping with 13 old kids, thats gross. but when a person becomes oh 16, 17 and they getting to be horny as all get out, what should it matter how much older their lover is or even if its their teacher?

who hasn't wanted to date one of their teachers going up? i just dont understand what all the hallo unboo is about. maybe its cause that being 22 years old have only dated women 10-18 years older than me, that im not understanding this. It wasnt all that long ago that people used to get married at 15, 16 years old. if its consensual and no party is manipulating the other, then just treat it like every other relationship. no one should be doing jail time for who they love. there is nothing about this may december relationship that automatically make them wrong.

ps yes, the teachers shouldnt abuse their power but that also applies to every other case as well.

Could you please explain the stuff I bolded? Do you have a story for that, and how is that relevant to the thread?

 

[MetalMagpie]

> yes if the student is 15 or youner
> no if the student is 16 or older

Maybe I'm being thick, but what's the difference between those two options?

Age of consent, if they are under 16 it's illegal. Which renders the whole thing irrelevant, it's like asking if gay couples should get be allowed to get married if one of them is 8 years old, a horse and dead.

What I mean is, surely these two statements are equivalent to each other:

"It should be a crime if they're 15 or younger."
"It shouldn't be a crime if they're 16 or older."

Laying aside the whole issue of age of consent (which would make the first option a crime in the UK anyway) those two statements seem to be logically the same.

 

[AVATAR_RAGE]

If they were in love would both wait until the student was out of education. Teachers need to remain in a position where they cannot pick and choose favorites, not to mention you could just get people becoming educators so that they could touch up younger people. No love in the latter just wrong-ness (yeah I said it).