Quotes from your own life
- Thread starter Zechnophobe
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Very profound- you have a way with words.emeraldrafael said:
"Kremlin goat waffles." -Me
"Here are the smoke bombs. Here are the matches. Go play in the woods." -my mom (it was an interesting childhood)
"My Creative Writing teacher is what you would get if you crossed Alice Cooper with Yoda. This semester is going to kick ass." -Me
"This is from my 'Birds of Prey Pooping' series. Here we see our proud and regal national symbol launching a turd." -my cousin (a photographer)
THanks. I can get philosphical if I decide to. Usually its just random mumblings to friends that I make up off the top of my head and they say thats really thoughtful.Spekter068 said:
i string together the first part of insults and swearwords whenever something goes wrong, lasting from 10 to about 100 seconds in length. and i never finish it properly so before i die i will have to finish that string of sentences with a swear so exquisite it will keep death away.
time is money, at least until i get my time machine to work.
time is money, at least until i get my time machine to work.
My only decently profound saying is "Everybody's normal until you get to know them", and I highly doubt I'm the only one to have come to this conclusion but I felt it worthy of note.
This one's not me but I heard it and had to include it in this post. Keep in mind it was said in 2004. "So, say you have a car engine. What's good nowadays, 4 horsepower?"
This one's not me but I heard it and had to include it in this post. Keep in mind it was said in 2004. "So, say you have a car engine. What's good nowadays, 4 horsepower?"
?I see you in a mud mask, curlers, and figureless robe, and I feel the exact same way as when I see you in a sexy new dress or fresh out of the shower. What exactly that means is your discretion, but if it?s gonna put me on the couch for three more days then I immediately retract what I said. You know what, yeah, forget what I just said, you?re sexy as hell.?
She asked me if a pair of pants she was wearing made her look fat.
She asked me if a pair of pants she was wearing made her look fat.
"your are both a woman and wrong"
"why yes retards and Boagns [read white trash, chaves] do deserve an education, they just don't deserve my education"
"why yes retards and Boagns [read white trash, chaves] do deserve an education, they just don't deserve my education"
"If it isn't something I'm going to remember on my deathbed, it's not something worth getting upset about."
Not a quote as much as a philosophy I have for myself. Comes in quite handy sometimes.
Not a quote as much as a philosophy I have for myself. Comes in quite handy sometimes.
When the shit hits the fan, you can always be certain that some of that shit will land on you.
EVERY. SINGLE. TIME.
EVERY. SINGLE. TIME.
"I'm complaining, yes? but do you know what else I'm doing that you aren't? NOT BEING A FUCKING ASS."
"He ate my arm! I liked that arm! Imma rape his biscuits!"
"It was awesome and confusing, like a thousand angels struggling to give you a handjob at the same time..."
"The difference between me and you that means I keep girlfriends and you don't is that I am currently baking blueberry muffins for a beautiful woman, and you are calling me pussy-whipped for doing so. The secret to happiness is in the muffins. Look at them. OBSERVE AT THEIR MUFFINY SECRETS!!!"
"Is that a frozen panda leg? I'm calling the police."
"Yes, I'll cook dinner tonight! Just let me educate these noobs first. What? Of course pwnage takes precedence over steamed broccoli! Have you ever eaten steamed broccoli? It's like Satan's fibrous armpit hair..."
"It was awesome and confusing, like a thousand angels struggling to give you a handjob at the same time..."
"The difference between me and you that means I keep girlfriends and you don't is that I am currently baking blueberry muffins for a beautiful woman, and you are calling me pussy-whipped for doing so. The secret to happiness is in the muffins. Look at them. OBSERVE AT THEIR MUFFINY SECRETS!!!"
"Is that a frozen panda leg? I'm calling the police."
"Yes, I'll cook dinner tonight! Just let me educate these noobs first. What? Of course pwnage takes precedence over steamed broccoli! Have you ever eaten steamed broccoli? It's like Satan's fibrous armpit hair..."
"Why is selfish such a negative word? When has the human race done anything beneficial to something that isn't the human race?"
"People aren't rational. They're rationalising."
"People aren't rational. They're rationalising."
"It's Masochism disguised as Capitalist intentions" - Explaining to my friend why I work 9am - 5pm then 10pm - 5am on weekends.