Really stupid movie ideas

[busterkeatonrules]

SNIP

I may own a battered old VHS copy of The Dark Backward. (I say 'may' because I have no idea where the copy is - or whether or not it has deteriorated to the point where it is no longer watchable.)

I did watch it once, though. And it was glorious.

On topic: Unnecessary remakes. On a conceptual level. Yup. Best I can do. Trying to imagine, from scratch, a laughably awful movie concept that isn't already in preproduction somewhere is at best a Herculean challenge in this day and age.

 

[Queen Michael]

A remake of the Marx Brothers classic Duck Soup with the main trio played by Adam Sandler, Rob Schneider and Jack Black.

 

[Asita]

For the sake of a bad example? Can you just imagine the pitches the folks at Pixar made for their films? "So we want to make a movie about a rat who wants to be a cook." "Oh you mean like Mickey Mouse?" "No no no, not a giant mouse standing in for humans, an actual rat in a human world." "So he's cooking for other rats then and has to deal with cats to get the ingredients?" "Oh heavens no. He'll be trying to make it in a gourmet restaurant for humans." "And the humans are ok with this?" "Nope. They'd kill him on sight." "Well how can he be a chef in a gourmet restaurant then?" "He'll be friends with one of the humans and act through him." "By talking?" "No. He'll control the guy like a puppet by tugging on strands of hair!"

Spoiler: ...That's ridiculous.

Spoiler: Done

 

[Dizchu]

A docu-drama/biographical film about Charles Darwin...

...written and directed by Kirk Cameron and Ray Comfort.

 

[SweetShark]

You know, even if I or others say a stupid Idea for a movie, someone maybe have a ability to make it something enjoyable for us to watch.

So for example If I say "A movie which there is an incarnation of Hercules as a chimpanzee." [which it was being satire in the old Hercules series], maybe there is a Movie Director out there who can make it work.
Maybe as an animation, maybe as a comedy, it doesn't matter, if the movie is good, the director done his/her/(its?) job.

 

[bartholen_v1legacy]

A remake of the Marx Brothers classic Duck Soup with the main trio played by Adam Sandler, Rob Schneider and Jack Black.

Pfft, Adam Sandler would never hire Jack Black as long as he's got his favorite fat friend Kevin James by his side. Pee and fart jokes, ahoy!

OT: Spirited Away... as an American remake... where it's a high school instead of a bathhouse... with Chihiro played by Nicola Peltz (the chick from the latest Transformers and The Last Airbender)... Jai Courtney as Haku... directed by M. Night Shyamalan.

A live action Berserk... with Nicolas Cage as Guts. Can you picture the overacting already?

But on the other hand, there's a fantastic movie idea that's just waiting to be realized: an M. Night Shyamalan movie with Nicolas Cage. Doesn't matter what it's about, just let the Cage flow.

And finally, there's a movie called One-eyed Monster, where the disembodied penis of Ron Jeremy terrorizes a group of people in a mountain cabin. http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0988043/?ref_=fn_al_tt_1

 

[Ten Foot Bunny]

A reboot of the Porky's franchise. Doesn't matter who's in it, who writes it, who directs it, or who's the set fluffer, the entire affair would be a train wreck.

However! I'd buy a copy of the movie's game, just to boast that I have the Atari 2600 version AND the new one.

 

[Albino Boo]

God challenges Satan to a game of where's Waldo. God is played by Eddie Murphy and Satan is played Nicholas Cage.

What a disappointingly conspicuous absence of Michael Sheen. Looks like a good film, but I regrettably have to disqualify it from my crapalogue for the crime of actually being quite a nice idea.

Rob Brydon is welsh and can do a pretty good Michael Sheen imation, so I figured its close enough.

 

[geK0]

Did anyone see that movie trailer with the living foosball figures who, judging from the trailer alone, don't seem to play a major roll in the actual plot? THAT looks like a dumb movie idea.

Then there's that Pixels movie which that other thread is talking about

Then there's the dumb ideas like the Lego Movie or Ted which somehow managed to work.

 

[Catfood220]

a movie about the terminator without the charm and with KHALEESI (ie shittiest actress in popular culture right now

Oh that's not fair, not while Kristen Stewart continues to call herself an actress. At least Emilia Clarke can portray different emotions other than a blank dead eyed stare.

Speaking of which

co-starring Kristen Stewart as the romantic interest

She would do better as the couch, at least she doesn't have act, just lay on the floor and do nothing. Its the perfect role for her.

 

[Bobic]

I'd love to see a biopic on Martin Luther King Jr, played by Zach Galifianakis, with an impassioned director(s) (hopefully Friedberg and Seltzer) defending him as 'the only man who could portray him', just to see if society as we know it would collapse.

Moving on from that, did you know Will Smith was considered for the role of Neo in the Matrix. Say what you will about Keanu 'balsa wood cut-out' Reeves, but the whole spaced-out thing worked in that film, and Will Smith (1999 Will Smith that is, still seen as the Fresh Prince, between Men in Black and Wild Wild West, soon to release 'Willenium') joking through the whole thing, getting jiggy with Morpheus, and bringing in dollops of cheese would've ruined it. . . a whole 4 years before the sequels did.

I was also going to mention Steven Segal trying to create a Genghis Kahn movie, with him as the lead, but won't go much further, because honestly, while that is a terrible idea, even if you have the best idea in the world, adding the words 'starring Steven Segal' instantly creates a bad film.

 

[Albino Boo]

I was also going to mention Steven Seagal trying to create a Genghis Kahn movie, with him as the lead, but won't go much further, because honestly, while that is a terrible idea, even if you have the best idea in the world, adding the words 'starring Steven Seagal' instantly creates a bad film.

There is a John Wayne movie with him as Genghis Kahn. It was so bad that he tried to buy up all the prints.

 

[sageoftruth]

This movie is about a dance battle between two high school dance troupes. The problem is, the zombie apocalypse has struck and everyone except for the squad leaders have become brain-dead zombies. Can Betty prove that her undead dance troupe can shuffle better than stuck-up Sasha's "popular" zombies? Come find out in the new movie, "Shuffle Up".

 

[sageoftruth]

A remake of Sense and Sensibility, starring Arnold Schwarzenegger and Sylvester Stalone as Elinor and Marianne, in 3D!!!!