Relationship Deal Breakers

[Mr F.]

2. See above. STI's can be cured, with EASE, and relationships and sex are not the same thing. Seriously.

I said STD's/HPVs not just STI's and you are "WRONG" not all Sexually transmitted infections can be cured with ease, case in point drug-resistant syphilis. I had the unpleasure of studying a lot of these diseases and they're not pretty or as harmless as you seem to think, far from it.

3. Hah. I assume this is a joke? People listen to music and have varied music taste. Fuck it, I listen to everything from Alanis Morissette, Annie Lennox through to Ashtar Command and Dragonland. Someone having a guilty pleasure with regards to music is a deal breaker? How judgmental are you? That said, I do not think much for Beiber, but it would not be a deal breaker.

It was until I tried my own Justin Bieber challenge, after the 3rd song I was thinking of ways to hurt myself to take my mined off the abomination I was hearing. There is a reason why he was booed at the Grey Cup.

4. Religion is a deeply personal thing. As long as someone is not trying to change your mind, who gives a fuck. I say this as a Christian Atheist dating a Devout Agnostic. Religion is Religion. Its personal. Unless it causes them to break my cardinal rule (Being unkind) who gives a flying fuck?

I do that's why I put it in the list

5. You didn't qualify on any level bar declaring it to be down to not giving a damn about health. Sorry, I am going to put this one down to you being shallow. As most other people have. There are REASONS behind most actions.

Well I'm sorry that you think having standards means you're shallow. I try and eat healthy and get regular exercise, I expect the same. I don't hold anyone to anything I wouldn't be willing to do. Gaining 5-10lbs probably isn't going to bother me much, gaining 50+lbs were going to have a problem. I like tall skinny girls sue me.

Read through a few posts. I have the following statement directed at the VAST MAJORITY of people within this thread:

No wonder so many of you ***** about being forever alone. Most of you are coming across as incredibly judgmental dickwads/bitches. People, please, how hard is it to accept that people make mistakes! I mean, fucking hell, I smoked for 6 years. 6 years! Since I was 14! Should I really be judged for the person I was when I started? Should I really be judged for finding it fucking hard to kick the habit?

Like I said it's called standards some people have them, some people don't.

Well, I will make this quick.

When most people think STI's they think chlamydia or Herpes, both things which can be rather easily treated (With long lasting effects, true, but at least you are no longer contagious) and not drug resistant shyphillis.

As for anything else?

Well... Nope, everything still holds. You obviously have no idea what the word love is. That is my main contention. Any of your protests would be overruled by love. Sure, they all make sense for a casual relationship, they all make sense for a fuckbuddy or for things to look out for BEFORE you start dating.

But my main issue is you using the word love! Because if you were already in love, the issues you list would either be water under the bridge or totally and utterly unimportant.

Finally, standards. Really. I see the thinly veiled comment you are trying to make. And I counter thus. Which one of us is dating the incredibly hot utterly amazing ballet dancer? Its not about having "Standards its about not being an utter prick. Ya see, what with my whole "Not being a judgmental prick willing to right people of immediately based on percieved character flaws" I ended up with one of the most amazing girls I have ever had the good grace to meet, purely because I am a nice person, a non-judgmental person.

And because she is a nice person, a non-judgmental person, she is happy to be with me. Hell, she is in love with me. Despite who I was. Because I am a good person. I made that clear the first time around.

You can have standards without being a judgmental prick. My ex partners and my current partner are attractive, they are people I find attractive, cause yeah, date people you find attractive. My current partner is a gamer, with many of the same interests I have etc etc. She is compatible with me. And healthy. So yes, there are the standards. The difference being that the only thing I judge people on is the only thing that matters "Are you a nice person".

Read through a few posts. I have the following statement directed at the VAST MAJORITY of people within this thread:

No wonder so many of you ***** about being forever alone. Most of you are coming across as incredibly judgmental dickwads/bitches. People, please, how hard is it to accept that people make mistakes! I mean, fucking hell, I smoked for 6 years. 6 years! Since I was 14! Should I really be judged for the person I was when I started? Should I really be judged for finding it fucking hard to kick the habit?

Should someone really be judged for who they were and not who they are?

My girlfriend and I have a rule. If it happened more than a year before our relationship started, it doesn't fucking matter. Because it is who I was. Not who I am. And I have been a horrible person, but I am NOT a horrible person (You see the logic here?).

Yeah, some of you are being logical. I can understand not choosing to date someone who is crazy or treats people like shit or is simply incompatible. But having an itemized list of deal breakers, a long list of things you consider 'Unacceptable'?

Get off your high horses. Nobody is perfect. Everybody makes mistakes.

Every human-being is judgmental. You are judgmental. You are judging everyone who posted in this thread by being "Dickwads/bitches".

These are nothing but lists on what we THINK we do not want in a relationship either do to what we have conceived or have been through in previous relationships. We know that if you meet that right person nothing will matter about her (or his) flaws (as every human-being has them).

So please, don't tell us to get off our "high horses" when you are doing the exact thing you say we are doing.

I can see your point! It is totally valid! Wait, no, that was absolute bullshit.

Calling someone out on being a judgmental ***** or bastard does not make me a judgmental ***** or bastard. If someone is being a judgmental ***** or bastard and I state as much, that is because of the way they are acting, not any preconcieved notion of their nature (I have never talked to most of these people).

Sorry.

If you have an itemised list of relationship deal breakers, things you claim to refuse to ever get over, you are a judgmental prick. Fact. End of. You are willing to make judgments of character based on these things, be they smoking, drinking, being fat, liking the occasional shitty song, then you are being a judgmental prick.

Sometimes, if one has the moral highground, one may stand there. Sometime one earns ones high horse. And right now, reading these responses has allowed me to stand up here, towering above many people within this thread, simply because I am older, wiser and willing to accept that people make mistakes.

Also, just about everyone is not the same as everyone. I agree with some people within this thread. YOu know, the occasional person who are chiming in with similar sentiment. I do not assume that you are all pricks until proven otherwise, I wait to see the kinds of thing being posted and then I make judgments based on the judgments others are making.

If your list is longer then about... I will be generous, three points. Three things you simply CANNOT stand. Then I think it is time you grew up.

 

[Spinozaad]

1. "Not having an own opinion."

This leads to me not liking you, which is the biggest dealbreaker, I guess.

 

[Jynthor]

1: No cheating. It should be rather obvious, but I take an even more negative view than most. Call me old-fashion, but I believe that you should stay with the one you marry for you whole life unless they do something, and while I am not above forgiving cheating if it happens once, I dont want it to be a biweekly thing.

2: No Drugs. Weed, Smokes, all of them. The occasional beer is fine, but you shouldnt be falling over drunk, and you shouldnt see 2 identical mes standing side by side.

Spoiler: On a side note (possible making people mad)

God help you if you say you want the war on drugs ended. I am ok with decriminalizing to an extent, but It should all stay illegal. I DONT CARE!!!! if its not as bad as beer or cigarettes. I DONT CARE!!!! if we can tax it. We have enough drugs legal already. We dont need more. If anything, we should be taking the fight to the drug lords in Mexico instead of trying to stop EVERYTHING on this side of the border. Dont want to do it. Then I got 6 words for you: Let me push the F$%^ing Button!

3: If you came expecting sex outside of marriage, you may as well turn around now and leave, because it aint going to happen. As far as I am concerned, sex is something that is only done between married individauls and nothing else will make me change my mind.

4: They cant be overly religious to the point of denouncing science and the like. However, they also can not say that those who are religious are idiots. I come from a very religious family, and while I am not as religious as they are, I am still pretty spirtiual.

5: Sorry, you want to be around me, you are going to have to get used to guns, because I am going to have at least 2 real guns and many "airsoft" model guns to my name.

6: There are afew things you never speak ill of. You dont talk about about my parents. You dont curse the United States (or else you get chased by one angry patriot). In a similar vein, you do not speak ill of the South, and its an even worse idea to speak ill of the Midwest. If you say anything negative about the fact that I drive a pickup truck, you should leave...NOW. You know, the basics.

7: I can take you have different political opinions than me, but there are afew that need to be relatively similiar. On the same note, No bashing of any political party[footnote]Although, calling bull on certain policies is fine as long as it doesnt conflict with the aforementioned "We must agree on afew things." standard[/footnote]. I'm am a very proud Republican, and while I call bull on many things they do (thier emphasis on religion and opposition to gay marriage cheif among them), if you are going to call Republicans "evil" based on afew nuts, you might as well leave. In exchange, I will not talk bad about whatever political party you are a member of, whatever that may be.

And of Course, My girlfriend passes all 7 requirements to a T.

Wow, I almost feel bad for your girlfriend.

 

[Roguelike]

Smoking is about the only thing I cannot work around

 

[AngloDoom]

1: Having poor self-image
Because it's hard to love someone when they spend so much time hating themselves

2: Having a sense of self-importance
Because it's hard to love someone who hates everyone else

3: Laziness
Because it's hard to love someone who thinks everything is hard work


Those are really the three cardinal sins for me. Sure, people having their moments of insecurity and I'll be there to help them in these moments, but if their default mode is feeling worthless I'm not spending half the relationship trying to convince them they're in the same league as me. Similarly, I love people who are proud of their achievements and things that they can do, but I hate it when the same person feels it makes them better than the people around them - especially when it comes to looks. Well done, you won the genetic lottery and have a pretty face but that doesn't make you any better of a person.

Constant laziness is pretty much unforgivable. I love having lazy days with people I love where we barely leave the bed and just snuggle up and watch films or something, but when that same person complains every day about how much they wish they could lose a few pounds but they can't be arsed to do anything about it...that's what makes me want to bite their face off.

EDIT-

1) Being under 200lbs . No skinny bitches for me thanks . I would MAYBE sleep with a skinny girl , but never date one .

Wait, wait, what?

Less that 200lbs is 'skinny'? I'm a 5ft11 male and the most I've ever weighed was 175lbs and that was after a year of going to the gym to bulk up and eating like a dinosaur.

For the average height women isn't 200lbs obese or, at least, heavily overweight?

 

[BOOM headshot65]

Wow, I almost feel bad for your girlfriend.

Lets see:
1)She hates cheater even more than I do (blame her cheating stepdad)
2) she hates drugs and is allergic to cigarette smoke/has parents/aunt who smoke saying "Dont do it. Its terrible and bad for you. Dont make my mistake."
3) She takes it even further than me and says that sex is ONLY for having children. Not for fun. Not because you are married/in a relationship. Not because "YOLO, *****". ONLY!!! for reproduction. In fact, one the the reasons she loves is BECAUSE I dont want sex with her until we want children.
4) She believes in god and the devil, and believes that rather than Heaven and Hell we walk the Earth as ghost when we die. And she anti-thiest just as much as she hates fundies.
5) What does she say to guns? "Give me one. And some dynamite. I want big boom!!"
6) Loves my family (and her family loves me), is just as patriotic as I am (but doesnt really like the government, Democrat or Republican, or anyone.) She loves the Midwest and would hate to live in New York or California, doesnt have an opinion on my pickup truck but likes them (she wants a motorcycle), and very little other problems. Theres a reason that in the 1.8 years we have been dating, we have not had ONE SINGLE fight with words (or fist).
7) We agree on the most important things, all she really cares about is Gay Marriage and Social Security. Other than that, if someone brings up politics you will get the reaction of either "Lalala, Im not listening!" or "All of you are crazy!! Im leaving." She doesnt like people fighting, thus avoids politics because all she sees is fighting.

With all this considered...........I fail to see the problem here. Why are you sorry for my girlfriend again??

 

[In Search of Username]

Wow, I almost feel bad for your girlfriend.

Lets see:
1)She hates cheater even more than I do (blame her cheating stepdad)
2) she hates drugs and is allergic to cigarette smoke/has parents/aunt who smoke saying "Dont do it. Its terrible and bad for you. Dont make my mistake."
3) She takes it even further than me and says that sex is ONLY for having children. Not for fun. Not because you are married/in a relationship. Not because "YOLO, *****". ONLY!!! for reproduction. In fact, one the the reasons she loves is BECAUSE I dont want sex with her until we want children.
4) She believes in god and the devil, and believes that rather than Heaven and Hell we walk the Earth as ghost when we die. And she anti-thiest just as much as she hates fundies.
5) What does she say to guns? "Give me one. And some dynamite. I want big boom!!"
6) Loves my family (and her family loves me), is just as patriotic as I am (but doesnt really like the government, Democrat or Republican, or anyone.) She loves the Midwest and would hate to live in New York or California, doesnt have an opinion on my pickup truck but likes them (she wants a motorcycle), and very little other problems. Theres a reason that in the 1.8 years we have been dating, we have not had ONE SINGLE fight with words (or fist).
7) We agree on the most important things, all she really cares about is Gay Marriage and Social Security. Other than that, if someone brings up politics you will get the reaction of either "Lalala, Im not listening!" or "All of you are crazy!! Im leaving." She doesnt like people fighting, thus avoids politics because all she sees is fighting.

With all this considered...........I fail to see the problem here. Why are you sorry for my girlfriend again??

\

I imagine it's because she sounds like the most boring person in the world.

 

[disgruntledgamer]

Well, I will make this quick.

When most people think STI's they think chlamydia or Herpes, both things which can be rather easily treated (With long lasting effects, true, but at least you are no longer contagious) and not drug resistant shyphillis.

WHAT!!!! Where in the world are you getting your medical information from and don't say a doctor! This statement is beyond ignorant, Herpes never becomes non-contagious EVER! Herpes is highly contagious, you can pass on herpes even without an outbreak or symptoms and condoms don't provide complete protection.

Genital herpes as been linked to a significant increased risk of cervical cancer when combined with HPV, and trust me when I say that`s one of the ways you don't want to die. Not to mention the fact it can also lead to birth defects and miscarriages. Other STIs like HPV can take up to 2 years to completely clear up, so they`re not as harmless or as easy to fix as you seem to think.

Do a little research before you start spouting such nonsense.

http://www.cdc.gov/std/herpes/stdfact-herpes.htm

As for anything else?

Well... Nope, everything still holds. You obviously have no idea what the word love is. That is my main contention. Any of your protests would be overruled by love. Sure, they all make sense for a casual relationship, they all make sense for a fuckbuddy or for things to look out for BEFORE you start dating.

But my main issue is you using the word love! Because if you were already in love, the issues you list would either be water under the bridge or totally and utterly unimportant.

You obviously have no idea what you're talking about when it comes to STDs/STIs in treatment, prevention or risks. Love is a man made concept that`s subjective, the facts however are on my side. I`m a microbiologist dude I know what I`m talking about when it comes to diseases and you`re wrong, diseases will never be unimportant to me, both professionally and emotionally.

This seems like a touchy topic for you and I`m truly sorry if you do have something like herpes, but don`t expect everyone to follow your opinion and jump on the "herpes means nothing and is insignificant" bandwagon especially when it is significant.

I can see your point! It is totally valid! Wait, no, that was absolute bullshit.

If your list is longer then about... I will be generous, three points. Three things you simply CANNOT stand. Then I think it is time you grew up.

You`re half right someone is full of BS and needs to grow up, but I don`t think it`s him....................

 

[Mr F.]

Well, I will make this quick.

When most people think STI's they think chlamydia or Herpes, both things which can be rather easily treated (With long lasting effects, true, but at least you are no longer contagious) and not drug resistant shyphillis.

WHAT!!!! Where in the world are you getting your medical information from and don't say a doctor! This statement is beyond ignorant, Herpes never becomes non-contagious EVER! Herpes is highly contagious, you can pass on herpes even without an outbreak or symptoms and condoms don't provide complete protection.

Genital herpes as been linked to a significant increased risk of cervical cancer when combined with HPV, and trust me when I say that`s one of the ways you don't want to die. Not to mention the fact it can also lead to birth defects and miscarriages. Other STIs like HPV can take up to 2 years to completely clear up, so they`re not as harmless or as easy to fix as you seem to think.

Do a little research before you start spouting such nonsense.

http://www.cdc.gov/std/herpes/stdfact-herpes.htm

As for anything else?

Well... Nope, everything still holds. You obviously have no idea what the word love is. That is my main contention. Any of your protests would be overruled by love. Sure, they all make sense for a casual relationship, they all make sense for a fuckbuddy or for things to look out for BEFORE you start dating.

But my main issue is you using the word love! Because if you were already in love, the issues you list would either be water under the bridge or totally and utterly unimportant.

You obviously have no idea what you're talking about when it comes to STDs/STIs in treatment, prevention or risks. I never used the word love that was you, love is a man made concept that`s subjective, the facts however are on my side. I`m a microbiologist dude I know what I`m talking about when it comes to diseases and you`re wrong, diseases will never be unimportant to me, both professionally and emotionally.

This seems like a touchy topic for you and I`m truly sorry if you do have something like herpes, but don`t expect everyone to follow your opinion and jump on the "herpes means nothing and is insignificant" bandwagon especially when it is significant.

I can see your point! It is totally valid! Wait, no, that was absolute bullshit.

If your list is longer then about... I will be generous, three points. Three things you simply CANNOT stand. Then I think it is time you grew up.

You`re half right someone is full of BS and needs to grow up, but I don`t think it`s him....................

Well...

no matter how much you were in love with them.

You cannot even remember the opening post. Which you posted. So I consider this discussion to be closed. Good day to you, ser.

That was easy enough!

Consider my input to this discussion to be closed. I tire of you. And the other vapid individuals within this thread. Sometimes the escapist brings out the worst in me, and others, and I believe this is one of those times.

By the way, misusing punctuation in the fashion you did at the end of your post weakens your entire argument and makes it hard to take you seriously.

So again, my main contention comes down to the words YOU USED within your opening post, the words you then FORGOT USING during this reply. Get rid of those words and everything else you have stated makes sense.

However:

no matter how much you were in love with them.

Overrules

I never used the word love that was you, love is a man made concept that`s subjective

I consider this discussion to be closed.

 

[disgruntledgamer]

I never used the word love that was you, love is a man made concept that`s subjective

I consider this discussion to be closed.

I like how you completely ignored the source I provided you with proving you wrong and focused on the most insignificant part, but you`re right I did use that term I forgot. However this discussion was closed the minute you said herpes becomes non-contagious. That`s not only wrong, but dangerous thinking.

So again, my main contention comes down to the words YOU USED within your opening post, the words you then FORGOT USING during this reply. Get rid of those words and everything else you have stated makes sense.

It`s already done, you see when I make a mistake or find an error I`m quick to correct it and admit it, Your turn. Everyone slips up now and again, sorry I could`t exactly remember what I said 6 pages ago.

 

[DRTJR]

I haven't been in a relationship (not for lack of trying.) but I can guess.
No having sex with other guys.
Drug use.
Anti-Religion
Anti-Capitalist
Hates all things Nerd.

But I have no standards in potential girlfriends (I still can't get one).

 

[AnarchistFish]

3. Listening to Justin Bieber - Self explanatory

Come on that's just silly

also the STD one is harsh. if you actually loved them you'd help and stay with them through it.

1. Cheating with no remorse (basically if they do it twice or if I found out before they admitted it)
2. Doesn't like music at all. I don't care what music they listen to (although I'd love to be with someone I could share my music with) but I couldn't be with someone who doesn't understand at all what music means to me
3. Being a ****, unreliable, compulsively lying, untrustworthy
4. Refusing to accept they'll always be 2nd best to Eva Green

really though there isn't much which would kill it completely. there are some things that would really put me off though and I can't imagine myself enjoying being with someone who-

5. Is addicted to drugs (unless they wanted help against it)
6. Doesn't like godspeed you! black emperor
7. Is unintelligent, unaware of what's going on in the world

3) Having a "stay at home" personality: I enjoy travelling and exploring, wouldn't want to be tied to someone who didn't have that same drive

Oh this too^

I'm not sure if I'd want to be with someone who'd want to live in the same place for the rest of the lives. It might be a tough ask especially since it could conflict with having a family, but finding someone who shares that same desire would be great.

Really I'd love to be with someone who shares a similar music taste/take on music as me, is independently minded, politically aware (& left wing) and shares a desire to explore and travel. And whilst not having those isn't a deal breaker I can't imagine being with someone for the rest of my life who doesn't have at least most of those.

1. Being very much anti-theist. I am religious so I think it wouldn't work if someone was very much against religion

2. Being very left wing. Same as above.

That's it, I would imagine.

Lol I'm exactly the opposite.

Shame we can't ever be able to make it work

 

[AmayaOnnaOtaku]

1. Cheating (Never fun to get the battery of STI tests because of infidelity)
2. Abuse/controlling behavior (Dealt with it in the past...NEVER again)
3. Different religious beliefs (Sorry I am a christian and want to marry a fellow believer)
4. Smoking (asthmatic)
5. Dishonesty
6. Refusal to get a job/able to drive a car. (I am not your taxi or your personal bank account)

 

[DRTJR]

I haven't been in a relationship (not for lack of trying.) but I can guess.
No having sex with other guys.
Drug use.
Anti-Religion
Anti-Capitalist
Hates all things Nerd.

But I have no standards in potential girlfriends (I still can't get one).

I'm telling you man, drop the religion and politics qualifications... especially if you're not doin' too great with the ladies.

Most people I've met have stupid religious and political viewpoints, and I'm sure they think the same of mine. The best people on the planet are the ones who won't judge you for them, and if you can meet someone who doesn't and not judge them back, you'll be better off than if you meet someone who thinks exactly the same as you.

I really don't care what they think I just want acceptance of myself and tolerances my ideals.

 

[DRTJR]

I haven't been in a relationship (not for lack of trying.) but I can guess.
No having sex with other guys.
Drug use.
Anti-Religion
Anti-Capitalist
Hates all things Nerd.

But I have no standards in potential girlfriends (I still can't get one).

I'm telling you man, drop the religion and politics qualifications... especially if you're not doin' too great with the ladies.

Most people I've met have stupid religious and political viewpoints, and I'm sure they think the same of mine. The best people on the planet are the ones who won't judge you for them, and if you can meet someone who doesn't and not judge them back, you'll be better off than if you meet someone who thinks exactly the same as you.

I really don't care what they think I just want acceptance of myself and tolerances my ideals.

Ohh...

I misread your post.

Don't worry about it, the majority of people I'm friends with don't know I got to church every Sunday.

 

[Garyn Dakari]

Well, besides the obvious(Cheating, abuse, overly controlling, ect.):

1. Can't be anti-theist. This hypothetical girlfriend/wife would almost definitely have to be a Christian, but I might be fine with an agnostic/atheist, so long as they weren't anti-theist.

2. Has to be a non-smoker.

3. Has to be able to put up with my gaming habits and general nerdiness. She doesn't like nerds, well, guess it's not gonna work then xP

4. Also, sexual looseness is a major turn-off for me, most likely a deal breaker.

 

[Legion]

I think it's pretty arrogant to say "I would never date a smoker, drinker, person of this faith, person of this ideology, etc." as if such people would ever show interest in you to begin with given how hostile and intolerant you are towards their beliefs and behaviours.

I could say "I would never date a right winger!" but it is equally true that "A right winger would never date me." The former implies that I'm forced to constantly turn down right wingers who throw themselves at me, when in reality right wingers probably have as low an opinion of me as I have of them. "I would never date a smoker because I think they're gross" is also disingenuous because it ignores the flipside, which is "A smoker would never date me because I carry on like a precious little princess whenever they light one up".

I have not seen anybody suggest in any shape or form that they are the most attractive thing on the planet and draw up a list to save them rejecting people in person.

The flip-side is not being mentioned, because the OP didn't ask for it. The topic is not "Traits that you have that could hypothetically put other people off of dating you."

 

[Garyn Dakari]

I think it's pretty arrogant to say "I would never date a smoker, drinker, person of this faith, person of this ideology, etc." as if such people would ever show interest in you to begin with given how hostile and intolerant you are towards their beliefs and behaviours.

I could say "I would never date a right winger!" but it is equally true that "A right winger would never date me." The former implies that I'm forced to constantly turn down right wingers who throw themselves at me, when in reality right wingers probably have as low an opinion of me as I have of them. "I would never date a smoker because I think they're gross" is also disingenuous because it ignores the flipside, which is "A smoker would never date me because I carry on like a precious little princess whenever they light one up".

I have not seen anybody suggest in any shape or form that they are the most attractive thing on the planet and draw up a list to save them rejecting people in person.

The flip-side is not being mentioned, because the OP didn't ask for it. The topic is not "Traits that you have that could hypothetically put other people off of dating you."

So people are not mentioning it. You are also assuming that people who do not like these things are hostile/aggressive about it in real life. Most people are not that bad when it comes to these things in reality, but there is no tone in text based communication so it just comes across as being a lot more harsh than it is.

Also, you can turn people down politely. I could definitely still be friends with a smoker, atheist, someone more sexually loose than me, ect. I just wouldn't want to be romantically involved with said person. I have a couple friends who smoke, and several atheist friends. But no, I wouldn't date them...But if they ever showed interest, I wouldn't respond with hostility.

 

[Towels]

I don't want to be mean in this thread because I sense a lot of pain that I too have suffered, but seriously folks, dishonesty and betrayal are pretty basic deal-breakers for ANY relationship, not just romantic ones. If you do not consider these problems a given, then you have a much more serious issues than just dealing with that one person who disrespected you too much. I thought I was going to read about some quirky tastes, but this thread just makes me sad.

Kuddoes on those with anti-smoking policies. You may now consider yourselves disqualified from romantic evenings with me. I don't smoke (ciggerettes) but I don't mind those that do because in the 21st century smokers have enough manners to smoke away from the public. Only in rare cases will a smoker smoke near a public entrance, and this is usually because they are simply not thinking. In fact where I live there seems to be a strong dividing line between those that just want to enjoy a smoke outside a building, and those that want to bully their wills onto others. Its always the ardent non-smoker that bitches, not the smoker. Its a huge world out there, folks. WALK AROUND THE SMOKER AND QUIT YOUR FRAKING COMPLAINING. Best wishes on finding like-minded non-smokers.

And Others?
1) Monopolizing my attention. Balanced people call this "Being Clingy." Some folks like this for some reason, and although I can accept that I still want no part of it.
2) Bad Hygiene. I know this seems obvious like not smelling like trash but this can also be rather subtle. Ladies, if I go to use your bathroom and find a ton of make-up with nary a drop of soap then I will draw 2 possible conclusions: You're either a germophobe who only cares soap around in your purse (which is just odd), or that you care enough about your appearance to get positive attention for one evening, but not much more, and that's not going to cut it.

These are the only unique deal-breakers I can think of. Sadly, there are enough people who don't care about hygiene in their mates for me to be unable to consider it a universal given.

 

[Garyn Dakari]

Its a huge world out there, folks. WALK AROUND THE SMOKER AND QUIT YOUR FRAKING COMPLAINING. Best wishes on finding like-minded non-smokers.

I don't mind people smoking too much(Heck, I have a brother that smokes all the time), I just don't want to marry someone who's doing something every day that will eventually kill them. Plus it'd be a bad influence on any future kids we might have. And that's all assuming said hypothetical never smokes in the house. If she does, then one also has to worry about second-hand smoke, which is really bad especially for children(Which I would like to have after being married).