Relationships

[The Raw Shark]

Broke up with my first girlfriend a while back. At which point I realized that I am far too much of a pushover and have a terrible understanding on why people need to be properly confronted with a problem rather than expect them to improve even though rapidly increasingly irritating behavior proves otherwise. Never doing that from now on if I don't want to screw over my grades again. I mean we're cool now but I'm just wary from it.

Its not that I can't foster relationships it's just that from now on I think I'm just going to set a bar for myself on who I'd allow myself to get that intimate with. Mind you I'm not super picky about much. I just for some reason seem to attract a crowd that prefers more repetitive reassurance in different ways each time rather than solutions. I'm not apprehensive towards the former but I sure as hell am gonna keep the latter as something that people should expect of me.

 

[Solkard]

Grats on your anniversary.

I am also socially awkward and been single all my life. Unavailable or unrequited affections are the closest I've ever gotten to anything significant. I may be a stubborn/stupid romantic, as I get angry when relatives try to pressure me into a "piratical" relationship on the basis of it would be better than being alone.

 

[the December King]

Been with my better half for eleven years. We just got a house, and though I'm struggling for work at the moment (damn Maritime film industry just... collapsed), she certainly isn't- happily employed by the Dept of Nat. Resources in IT ( Graduated Cum Laude in Computer Science, and has degrees in History and Education- frigging nerd). She's three weeks younger than me. We share insecurities and doubts, but also our sense of humour and skepticism, and otherwise, though we aren't opposites, we do compliment each other quite well. Add to all of that our little son aged 1 1/2, and... I really should be smiling more, to be honest.

 

[2012 Wont Happen]

Me and my fiance's anniversary soon as well. Things are good. Other than normal things people say (eg. I like that she's nice, funny, supportive, pretty, and such), I also like how varied her behaviors are culturally. Sometimes she acts like a white girl with a tan and then I get to laugh because she makes fun of me for being a white boy, but then other times she does shit like try to cure fevers with potatoes, has her mom rub her with an egg for "ojo," or has me come along to pray to a colorful shrine to Jesus and the Virgin Mary in her grandpas house. I make fun of her for it, but I really like her family's culture, especially the Catholic elements, for the sense of community they have. I have to convert to Catholicism formally anyway to marry her at their church, but I've been considering sincerely converting as well because of that.

The only thing that bugs me sometimes about her is that we can't go anywhere with children without her pinching or slapping at me (not hard, more or less playfully) and saying she wants one. I want a kid too, but we just can't afford that right now. She understands that too, but she's a bit more impatient with it than I am. Besides, her freaking out over babies is pretty cute in a way.

 

[Ryallen]

I'm not in a relationship, have never been in one, and I would LOVE it if I can just get over the fact that I will never be in one. I'm not self depreciating, I'm just not someone who would be able to be in one. I rarely leave my home willingly, I'm not interested in anyone at my place of employment, and my college has a 10:1 guy/girl ratio. At least, where I usually go to classes, anyways. Having one seems fun, but I know that I'm just not emotionally compatible with having one. I'm really paranoid, clingy, have low self esteem, I don't go places, and whenever I want to do something, someone has to tell me to do it. I'm told that I should go out to find people, but I just can't work up the nerve or interest to leave my room.

 

[Glongpre]

I have had one relationship, which was weird. It was my first one, so obviously I had no idea what I was doing. There are apparently rules and guidelines to follow, and I rushed to some conclusions for sure. I guess I liked her the most because she put up with my silent behaviour. That is, I am pretty quiet, and I don't say too much. I am better now, but I still have terrible social anxiety, although it is pretty much only when talking to females. Guys I can get along with and show my true self much more easily. Women though, oh boy. Example just today a woman started talking to me as I was walking my dog, and by the end of it I felt my body temperature spike and some perspiration form.
So I am not in a relationship right now. Also, because of my anxiety it takes me a while to become comfortable around people. So if I just met someone, I will come across as quiet and not a very good socializer, but once I become comfortable around someone I can be pretty silly and talkative. I am still friends with my first, and I am a radically different person than when we first met.

If there is one thing I miss the most, it is probably cuddling and holding hands. So simple, so good.

Fuck anxiety though, what a pain in the ass. I just wanna be myself, god damnit, go away!

 

[Musette]

I haven't been in a relationship in ~6 years, and I've been single by choice ever since. I like to joke that getting my doctorate will be my way of marrying my music, and I'm going to start the audition grind around February. Should everything go smoothly, I'll have my second Master's degree next May, and I'm hoping to go straight into doctoral studies. Does that count as an exciting thing going on in my life right now? (I've got plenty of music stuff that's recently happened as well as music stuff that's about to happen, so I'll avoid rambling about all that.)

I also started Hormone Replacement Therapy three weeks ago, so that's a pretty big/exciting thing going on in my life, even if it still feels a touch surreal. It's especially weird because I'm only out to immediate family and two close friends, yet I'm already physically transitioning. Still, even if I don't say anything, people are probably going to notice eventually (especially when my voice starts dropping), so we'll see how long that takes. (Regardless, I plan on going by a different name by this time next year, if not sooner.)

 

[Chaos Isaac]

Recently started a relationship whose 5 month date is today. It's going great, even if life is getting tough on the both of us. There's a lot of love, and I think we'll make the years.

 

[Beffudled Sheep_v1legacy]

Congrats on the anniversary!

Currently single. I'm moving from New Jersey to Texas in a few months so I haven't really been bothering to get into one.

I look for the usual things in a relationship. You know, sharing enough interests for common ground and conversations, not sharing enough interests to have nice conversations trying to convert the other to the interest, moderately attractive or better looks.
The most important aspects though are having warm, kind, and loving personalities and actually caring about me as a person.
They also need to be able to handle my cheesiness. I am practically made out of cheese when in a relationship.

Gotta lot of problems I need to fix before I get into another relationship though.

 

[FPLOON]

Eh... I'm still not into anything outside of post-dating, which at that point it's just called being in a [romantic] relationship, anyway... However, I do value friendship much more favorably because that's where a vast majority of my relationships thrive the most on...

Other than that, I saw Keanu alone in a theater on Mother's Day with four other people and, my glob, was I the loudest person there!

Eurovision (totally not worth it this year)

Glad I'm not alone on that feeling? I mean, apparently, the previous years have been better and then some...

 

[sonicneedslovetoo]

Every once in a wile I have to go sit in a dark room and stop interacting with people entirely for like half an hour. Having people over even fairly calm people more than two nights in a row to visit makes me itch to be alone for a wile. Now that I think about it its been years since anybody has even bothered to ask me if I plan on getting into a relationship.

 

[TheRightToArmBears]

Ew, girls are gaaaaaaaay.

The best I could say is 'kinda, sorta, maybe, we'll see'. There's this girl who I dated when we were stupid teenagers and split up when we went to university. Every time we've seen each other we get on great, if we've had a drink things happen. Catch is, she's stuck living with a guy at university (rent contracts, he owes her money) who she hates, as far as I can tell. It's a messy situation, I'm going to have to be patient and see how it all pans out when she finishes university in a few weeks.

I am a terrible person.

 

[Chimpzy_v1legacy]

Not seeing anyone. I got a pretty raw deal when it comes to relationships, so I don't know about the future.

 

[ILovePandas]

I love my boyfriend even though he has a lot of problems <3

 

[MASTACHIEFPWN]

I met a girl in my Fantasy writing class, and we we're de facto together for the last month and a half, it went really well and shit, and just a few days ago she graduated and moved back home.

We decided beforehand not to say we were in a relationship or anything, because she knew she'd be moving back at the end of the semester, but it still didn't stop us from getting close or anything, and yeah, still a little shaken by that. We aren't in a position where we can still maintain a healthy relationship, and I just think that sucks. She was the first girl I've been in a relationship with sense a disastrous breakup three years ago, and I just feel lost again.

Felicitations a vous (Just discovered that the Escapist doesn't recognize accented characters, so please excuse the misspellings) for seven years, OP

 

[CrimsonBlaze]

I've never been in a serious committed relationship and I'm not really bummed about it.

Frankly, I've always been focused on one aspect of my life or another to really have the time to just go out and "find a woman." This also comes on the heels of me not really falling for or putting much emphasis on looks to entice me to go out with a woman. Sure I'll say "that woman looks beautiful" or "that lady is really cute," but for me to really be attracted to a woman I need to get to know them a little, figure out what they're about, and if I find myself being attracted to them, I'd want to go out on a date with them.

Currently, I'm still working on settling myself into my bachelor life after college, but if I come across a woman that I am sincerely attracted to, I'll definitely ask them out.

 

[SupahEwok]

Had a brief relationship in high school. Got dumped after a month so she could chase after one of my good friends. Wasn't great for the self confidence, even if we're all cool now. Haven't been particularly well positioned for a relationship since then; I've bumped around colleges trying to find something to get invested in, which doesn't make for a stable enough life for anything long term. I might've had something with a girl back in freshman year, but unless we end up living in the same city when we're both out of school, I doubt I'll ever know. Although I'm now in a program I think I'll be able to stick to, I've spent a year there so far, and haven't actually made any friends. Just haven't met anyone I felt I could be close with, and at a certain point I quit trying to find them, so there was no getting out of that rut. I'm gonna try again next semester, but at this point I'm fairly committed to just getting my degree and moving back somewhere I actually enjoy living.

As for what I'm looking for in a relationship, I want someone that makes the place I come back to at the end of the day feel like home. Someone who can be my partner, in every sense of the word. A tall order, to be sure, and combined with my lack of confidence, it makes working up the courage for a date very hard, but I can't imagine anything else that would provide some sort of comfort in our inexorable march to the void that is the cessation of consciousness. As far as personality goes, first and foremost would be somebody who found my teasing endearing, given that's my primary method of social interaction as it's the only thing I've been able to figure out to get consistent results out of people. Hell, the girl I talked about above could throw my crap right back at me. I've always been attracted to feisty girls.

I don't really see myself getting hitched to anybody, but I'm not so far down the depression spiral that I've completely discounted the possibility. There will be several phases in my life over the next 20 years, and anything can happen in each of them. I really hope I am able to find somebody. I'm a man of exceedingly little ambition, which is a big part of the problem with my studies, but I think I'd make a fantastic stay at home dad, if the wife had the income to support that and thought it was an equitable arrangement.

Congrats to OP and that others who are celebrating their anniversaries, and a further thanks to OP for the thread. It's nice to be able to state this stuff somewhere.

 

[Eclipse Dragon]

I know right?!? He's such a Dragonball fanboy, he knows everything about that series (I haaaate it, it's something about the art style I can't stand). I think deep down he knows he's wrong. Because he is.

I've since brought this conversation up with my boyfriend, while he's certainly a fan of DBZ (actually watching DBZ Super right now), he says while the saiyans get stronger the longer they fight, Saitama doesn't really seem to have a limit. In one episode of OPM he even got blasted to the moon, all he did was plug his nose and blast himself back to Earth, Saiyans don't really do that.

 

[Phasmal]

I know right?!? He's such a Dragonball fanboy, he knows everything about that series (I haaaate it, it's something about the art style I can't stand). I think deep down he knows he's wrong. Because he is.

I've since brought this conversation up with my boyfriend, while he's certainly a fan of DBZ (actually watching DBZ Super right now), he says while the saiyans get stronger the longer they fight, Saitama doesn't really seem to have a limit. In one episode of OPM he even got blasted to the moon, all he did was plug his nose and blast himself back to Earth, Saiyans don't really do that.

I know right? Boyfriend brought up that in the later seasons the Saiyans have like the power to destroy planets or whatever. But that's only if they stand there screaming like they're having toilet trouble.
He won't admit that he's wrong. Which in my 7 years experience means that he knows that he's wrong.
... I will get him to admit that he's wrong. I know this.

 

[ThatOtherGirl]

I know right?!? He's such a Dragonball fanboy, he knows everything about that series (I haaaate it, it's something about the art style I can't stand). I think deep down he knows he's wrong. Because he is.

I've since brought this conversation up with my boyfriend, while he's certainly a fan of DBZ (actually watching DBZ Super right now), he says while the saiyans get stronger the longer they fight, Saitama doesn't really seem to have a limit. In one episode of OPM he even got blasted to the moon, all he did was plug his nose and blast himself back to Earth, Saiyans don't really do that.

I know right? Boyfriend brought up that in the later seasons the Saiyans have like the power to destroy planets or whatever. But that's only if they stand there screaming like they're having toilet trouble.
He won't admit that he's wrong. Which in my 7 years experience means that he knows that he's wrong.
... I will get him to admit that he's wrong. I know this.

Saitama could totally take the DBZ crew. I am pretty sure boros was supposed to represent a dbz level fighter, at one point he says he is going to destroy the planet to kill Saitama if I remember, and Saitama defeated him without ever really getting serious.