Reliable Source: I Once Punched a 13-Year-Old in the Face

[Lono Shrugged]

you are Billy Bob Thornton in my brain movie. great article

 

[Woodsey]

I love these articles, although I feel I've missed something from a previous one as you said: "I was going through a rough patch with my wife who had gone mental after discovering that I had been secretly gaming behind her back."

 

[Eggsnham]

Lawl. That was a pretty epic story!

 

[Warstratigier]

Taking the fight to #$%holes, one fist to the face at a time.

 

[MorsePacific]

Absolutely brilliant, and also a pretty accurate description of why I don't join clans.

 

[Galad]

I'll never understand the bullshit drama about being unfairly accused of cheating when you simply are on a roll..

 

[-Torchedini-]

I actually had to laugh a few times.

Where's that follow button

 

[Gaias]

Don't we all want to punch a 13-year-old in the face all the time because the human condition compels us to righteous action!?

Fixed.

 

[MortalForNow]

I couldn't agree more with this anecdote. I feel like this every time I meet some annoying little teenager who (horribly) pretends to be a badass.

Also, speaking of that quote, I would have died laughing if you actually decided to take a crowbar and destroy the table that they were playing cards on while yelling that quote from the Big Lebowski.

 

[Zulu-Echo14]

Did you remember to say "that's what happens when you fuck a stranger in the ass!"?

 

[Dirty Apple]

Clan dramatics, RL videogame revenge, the betrayal of friendship, thats quite a few touchstones you, um, touched there. Its also very appealing to all of us who have been burnt by clan politics and angered by squeaky voiced snots, so basically 98.63% of the internet.

 

[SamuelT]

Woah. You lead an interesting life.

 

[ShadowKirby]

Marion Cox: Internet bard.

Amazing story man, as always.

 

[WolfThomas]

When I read that article's heading I went "Hey so have I!". Though my story was completely different, the punk flicked hot cigarette ash in my face with a cigarette he stole from my housemate.

 

[copycatalyst]

Jetpacks -not that cool? I only played the one-map demo of Secret Weapons, but it still holds one of my favourite gaming memories. I was just goofing around in a two man game on a LAN with my brother, who was upstairs in the room directly above me. He was using a Jeep as a land torpedo while I was on foot. I stood my ground, pecking away at him with an SMG as he roared straight at me. Little did he know I had snagged the jetpack. In his haste to commit vehicular manslaughter, he also failed to notice the flag pole immediately behind me. Just seconds before impact I took off and soared majestically over the Jeep which quickly became a flaming crumpled metal mess behind me. And then we both burst out laughing.

Much like I did reading your story.

 

[Michael826]

Don't we all want to punch a 13-year-old in the face some times?

all the time.

OT: great article, as always. you never cease to amaze me with your small anecdotes

 

[Onyx Oblivion]

Ah...keeping me entertained on the weekends.

 

[Emergent System]

Should've punched the "friend" in the face for taking some random internet teenager's word over yours.