Retail jobs: the dumbest customer question you've been asked?

[Waaghpowa]

I once had a woman come in who didn't know what a computer was, but she thought that having a monitor, keyboard and mouse would do the trick. Oh, and she was easily in her mid 30's.

 

[shiaramoon]

This is from an experience at a store I DIDN'T WORK AT. I went over after work, still in uniform, no name badge. The store's (employee)dress code was black shirt and khakis, my work uniform is blue shirt and khakis.

A customer comes up to me and asks me to help them get something off the top shelf, i told them that I don't work there and I go back to browsing. They come back with a manager still complaining that I'm "Not doing my job.". I turn to the manager, he looks at me and to the customer, and tells her again that I don't work there. She throws a fit threatening to call corporate over it.

The manager leans in close to me, asks me my name and if he can "fire" me. So we stage this "firing" and I finish my shopping, and I end up getting a gift card for my "troubles".

Very interesting to say the least.

If it's ok with you, I'm going to post this story on my FB page. I have got to share this

 

[Amethyst Wind]

Imagine, if you will, working at a popular fast food chain that specializes in "southern" [US] foods, the most notable of which being fried chicken and biscuits. Now imagine again, if you will, a customer coming up to you and asking for a staple of many Chinese food restaurants: shrimp fried rice.

With a straight face.

Was the person perhaps Chinese? Because in China, KFCs do sell rice dishes. I found it strange too but there you are.

 

[Dimitriov]

I was a cashier for a year at Target (basically a higher-class Walmart).

The most infuriating question/statement, by far, that I received on a weekly basis, when having difficulty scanning an item or locating the barcode, was this: "Oh, if it doesn't scan, that means it's free, right?"

Every one of them deserves a punch in the face.

I have worked at a 7 Eleven for years... and yes, every fucking time! "That means it's free, right?" No shit head, it doesn't, and that wasn't funny the first time I heard it... never mind the 1oooth.

I do love it when people come in and ask us if we sell cigarettes though

 

[Sansha]

FORTY DOLLARS FOR A HAIRCUT? Jesus Christ. I have long-ass hair that requires a fuck ton of maintenence and I pay only like, $25. And that's NOW; because of inflation, that $40 is equivelent to some higher amount nowadays, good lord

This is what you get for taking your children to a fucking salon for their snip-and-brush haircuts. Pocket change to my rich pricks of parents.

While I was working at Dunkin Donut, one time this hott chick came up and asked me "Do you have a phone number?" I was like "Obviously no, we only sell donuts, muffins and coffee..." What an idiot.

*shoulder pat*

I'm so sorry.

 

[Poindexter]

When I was in high school I worked in a liqueur store.It was a cavalcade of bad questions but the one that stuck was somebody coming up to me and asking where the, "O.K.-toberfest," beer was. I asked him if he meant, "Oktoberfest," he spent ten minutes yelling at me about how I shouldn't correct my elders and how they spoke.

 

[Mindlessidiots]

I work as a super market cashier, so I often get people complaining about the price of something like I some how have power over changing it. A lot of people also obsesses over the price per pound of a product, they don't care about the actual price of the product, just how much it is per pound. Oh and one time I was having this great conversation with a lady since she was a alumni of the college I go too, which I enjoy because with most customers the conversation goes like this

Me: Hello, how are you doing today?
Customer: *grunts*
Me: That's good, where you able to find everything you where looking for?
Customer: Yes

So yeah, I'm happy when I actually have a nice conversation with one of them. The customer after that comes up to me and asks "did I know how long I took with that customer?", "you took ten minutes with that customer, I was waiting while you talked away." it took a lot of personal control to not say anything to her.

 

[otakon17]

I was a basic attendant at Dunkin' Donuts for three years. And dear lord I'll never forget the stream of questions I got there in a single day on the much slower afternoon shifts.

"Do you have coffee?"
"Do you have donuts?"

In the drive-through, while they are staring at a HUGE MENU that says we HAVE those very same things.

"Is this Dunkin' Donuts?"

Once again, IN THE DRIVE-THROUGH WHILE THEY'RE LOOKING AT THE HUGE MENU THAT SAYS DUNKIN' DONUTS!

I don't know, maybe it was because it was one of those Dunkin' Donuts/Baskin Robbins stores. And then of course, back in the freak blizzard in March 2009, we had to close because the conditions were getting too bad out. We actually still had people coming through the drive-through WITH A BLIZZARD GOING ON.

Although that might just be people that really want their coffee.

 

[EnigmaticSevens]

I don't normally frequent the forums, but in this instance, I've got to chime in. While I was i high school (and for a couple years after graduation, before college) I worked as a chef. Generally, I didn't have to deal with front of the house stupidity (at least relative to the wait staff, hostesses, etc.). However, at one point I worked in a hospital's kitchens. One day they were shortstaffed in the cafeteria sections (think a mall's fast food court) and asked if a few of us could cover.

In any event, I'm now chilling in a Quiznos, popping out sandwiches. There are four stations in this mini food court, a Quiznos, a little burger grill joint, a salad station, and a smoothie shop. They form a simple 'U', and all the menu's are displayed not only back wall of each area, but on the little glass sneeze guard positioned, at most, A FOOT AND A HALF from the customer's face. Yet, and I shit you not, over two hours, I recieved requests for fried chicken, tacos, and LASAGNA. This is a Quiznos, we sell submarine sandwiches, that's it, nothing else, stop asking for random shit. And if you do ask for random shit, do not get irate an loud when we do no produce said random shit at your behest.

I suspect it's commonplace for people to storm into a McDonalds and demand a filet mignon, shrimp scampi, potatoes au gratin, and a glass of merlot.

 

[Project Cobalt]

I worked at Toys R Us for about a year. During that time, being a manly man (shut up, I am!) it was part of my job to bring items down to customers which were too large to fit on the sales floor. Bikes, swingsets, and sandboxes of both the large wooden variety and the smaller plastic varieties. So a customer brings up to the cash a slip which tells the cashier what to call and ask me to bring down. After going up a flight of stairs, rooting around to find that someone had put the tiny plastic sandboxes behind the larger wooden ones and moving those, I brought the sandbox down to the customer.


That is when I got the stupidest question I've yet to get in my six years of retail."Can you bring me another sandbox? This one is dirty."

The box. She was going to take home and put dirt in. Was dirty. IT IS A BOX FOR DIRT.

 

[Gardenia]

Not retail, but still:
I work in a pub, and a guest came up to the bar wanting a shot of Jägermeister. We were out of Jäger, so I told her "I'm sorry, we are all out." This was on a Saturday evening, around 23:30-ish. She, a native Norwegian, asked me: "Can't you go buy some more? I'll wait."

Now, in Norway, if you want to bring it out of the place you bought it, anything above 21,9% alcohol has to be bought in a special government run store called "Vinmonopolet," similar to the Swedish Systembolaget. On Saturdays, they close at 15:00. The only other option would be to go to another nearby bar (roughly 800 meters in -20 C), buy a shot of Jäger there, and bring it back to her (which would be illegal).

She then scolded me for being lazy and inexperienced. My boss threw her out for being, and I quote: "a *****."

 

[thejackyl]

SNIP

If it's ok with you, I'm going to post this story on my FB page. I have got to share this

Go right ahead. It's a good story for a laugh.

 

[SomebodyNowhere]

I couldn't think of one and then one from the other day dawned on me. I was helping another associate in electronics helping with the new releases and a customer over near the memory cards stated he had a question. He asked, and I kid you not, if the 8 gigabyte memory card was more than the 4. I kept my composure and answered. As soon as the customer was gone the associate I was helping stated how he couldn't handle a question that stupid.

 

[Kaisikudo]

I live in Scotland.

As I was giving one customer his change back, he specifically requested "English tenners only. I'm going home soon. Don't want to bring back any of your currency with me".


Sure, it's not the dumbest request that's ever been made of me, but it was definitely one of the most frustrating.

 

[kasperbbs]

I work as a super market cashier, so I often get people complaining about the price of something like I some how have power over changing it. A lot of people also obsesses over the price per pound of a product, they don't care about the actual price of the product, just how much it is per pound. Oh and one time I was having this great conversation with a lady since she was a alumni of the college I go too, which I enjoy because with most customers the conversation goes like this

Me: Hello, how are you doing today?
Customer: *grunts*
Me: That's good, where you able to find everything you where looking for?
Customer: Yes

So yeah, I'm happy when I actually have a nice conversation with one of them. The customer after that comes up to me and asks "did I know how long I took with that customer?", "you took ten minutes with that customer, I was waiting while you talked away." it took a lot of personal control to not say anything to her.

Truth be told i would be pissed too if i had to wait 10 minutes because the cashier is chatting with a friend. Usually they serve other customers while doing so.

 

[xmbts]

Old woman: *shoves a cup of yogurt in my face* "What's the date on this, read it to me."

Me: "It expires October 16th..."

OW: "So it's expired then?"

Me: "No. It expires in October..."

OW: "October?"

Me: "Yes."

OW: "That's already passed right?"

Me: "It's...August..."

 

[Odbarc]

Generally the "Do you work here?" while I'm working there wearing the stores branded T-shirts.
I know it's more of an ice-breaker to announce they want my attention to get information, but it does sound stupid and repetitive.

 

[Kaisikudo]

I remember one of the weirdest customers I've ever served. A tall, slim black man, who I would later come to refer to as Caterpillar Guy; because his only purchase was around 30 different pairs of shoes. And the pairs had nothing in common whatsoever. They were completely random design and sizes - plimsoles, dress shoes, trainers, sandals, high heels - both men and women and even kid's shoes.

I was astonished to see him arriving at the counter, with nothing but a trolley full of them. It took an extremely long time to finish scanning them all and I don't even remember how ridiculous the price was, but he paid by card. And when I was handing him over his incredibly long receipt, I said to him:

"I'm really sorry for asking, but I just have to know.... What do you need all these shoes for?"

His response was incredible.


"I have many feet."

 

[MortisLegio]

I have never worked retail but I still get asked/hear really stupid questions.

In a KFC:
"Do you guys sell hamburgers?"

While shopping at Gamestop:
"Where are the board games?"
"I was looking for some Xbox games. Do you know where I can get some?"
"Gears of War?" turns to me "Excuse me? Do you know if this game is violent?"