Ruin-A-Wish Foundation.

[SkyeNeko]

granted, but the hat is filled with poisonous spiders.

i wish for cookies!

 

[scorptatious]

Granted. But they are pot cookies.


Whether that's a bad thing or not is up to you.

I wish to be a kid again.

 

[Nouw]

Granted, but now you have fucked up time and space so the universe has exploded.

I wish to wipe out all trolls.

 

[DougNotDougie]

Granted; You are the only one left online.

I wish I had no wish.
(Paradox)

 

[Nouw]

You have a wish. At first it may seem like that but I have to ruin your wish by giving you one.

I wish I had a wish I lost.

 

[JezebelinHell]

Granted... Oh never mind, I seem to have misplaced it.

I wish I could sleep.

 

[havass]

Granted. He proceeds to break every rule in the school, neighborhood and country. Then he disappears, making you the most wanted man in your country.

I wish I had the ability to look in the future.

 

[Gypsy Ninja Pirate Zombie King]

Granted but the power drives you mad

i wish for a friend named robot dragon loli queen

 

[The Clown]

Granted but that friend will betray you for a small girl.

I want better wifi out here.

 

[lolmanxe]

Granted but you have no way to use it

i wish my computer was fixed

 

[Chairman Miaow]

granted but it's fixed to explode!

I wish for a cake.

 

[BrailleOperatic]

Granted, but you'll need to get through our Aperture Science Testing Facility.

I wish for a triumph.

 

[JezebelinHell]

Granted but it is a car. Specifically the one I used to own with a 4 banger Chevette engine in it... Like this:
http://www.diseno-art.com/images_3/Triumph_TR7.jpg
But hey it was freshly repainted that wonderful pimento red color...

I wish I didn't have so many things to do for the next 2 weeks.

 

[Nouw]

Granted, now you have 1 and that is to eat a chainsaw.

I wish for lemon grenades.

 

[Gypsy Ninja Pirate Zombie King]

Granted but they taste awful

i wish for a new car

 

[havass]

Granted. Once you get inside, the car explodes.

I wish I had a pen.

 

[BrailleOperatic]

Granted. Fifteen of them in fact.

I wish clowns weren't so creepy.

 

[scorptatious]

Granted, but now mimes are even creepier now.

I wish Calvin and Hobbes came back...

 

[BrailleOperatic]

Granted. Now you have to watch them go away again.

I wish MSPaint Adventures would update even more!

 

[scorptatious]

Granted, but the value of gold has degraded so those eggs are worthless.

I wish I could fly.