Ruin-A-Wish Foundation.

[Kieros]

It's burnt. And on fire. And you just picked it up with your hands.
(By the way, totally correct on the Violas)
I wish the harmonic series was divergent.

 

[AwesomeExpress]

Granted, but now it's too divergent.

I wish I had x-ray vision. Hellloooo ladies!

 

[Xpwn3ntial]

Granted, you make yourself and those around you sterile while all you get in return is the ability to see the skeletons of people.

I wish for a cake.

 

[Hyperrhombus]

Granted. You now have a cake 56 miles across.

I wish for assassins creed.

 

[ERROR989]

Granted. It's Japanese.

I wish for MGS: Snake Eater 3d.

 

[Hyperrhombus]

Granted. You have also lost your left eye.

I wish for a dirtbiking flapjack.

 

[mcpop9]

Granted, but it shortly gets chased down and promptly eaten.
I wish for a peice of paper

 

[ERROR989]

Granted. It has a picture of a penis drawn on it.

Granted. You have also lost your left eye.

I wish for my left eye.

 

[Hyperrhombus]

Granted. You now have pinkeye.

I wish for firefox.

 

[mcpop9]

wish granted, but peta shows up at your door and refuses to leave.
i wish for penis on the paper i got to be erased

 

[Hyperrhombus]

granted. you are allergic to paper.

[EDIT]Whups no wish...

 

[Redlin5_v1legacy]

I wish for magic.

 

[Eumersian]

Granted. Enjoy exploding yourself accidentally because you totally suck at it and stuff.

I wish for a better pair of pants.

 

[AwesomeExpress]

Granted, but someone else is already in them. They fight you to the death, you lose. Meanwhile, the pants are just fine.

I wish for five awesome skateboards.

 

[Kieros]

Granted. Here are ten million. Nine million, nine hundred ninety-nine thousand, nine hundred ninety-five of them will explode as soon as you, and only you, touch them. Good luck finding the five good ones.

.sdrawkcab ton saw taht yaw a ni epyt dluoc I taht hsiw I

 

[Hyperrhombus]

granted. you can only type in one dimension now.

I wish for a fish?

 

[Norendithas]

Granted, but it is consuming your right arm, and cannot be removed. I'm going to say it never dies, so you don't smell of rotting fish for the rest of your life. That'd just be cruel. ;P

I wish for a Dr. Pepper castle!

 

[Redlin5_v1legacy]

Granted but touching it makes your teeth rot out. Immediately.

I wish for the end of all time.

 

[Hyperrhombus]

Granted, time has been replaced with bullet-time.

I wish for an unruinable wish.

 

[Redlin5_v1legacy]

Granted but it belongs to me now!

I wish for a fish that is delish.