Ruin-A-Wish Foundation.

[steeple]

granted. it's huge, and it crushes you to death.

I wish ubisoft would throw the always-online drm to the trash

 

[AwesomeExpress]

Granted, but then ubisoft goes bankrupt ..which makes all their games fail ...magically.

I wish my roommate was a better baker.

 

[Robert632]

Granted. Now your room-mate bakes bad on purpose.

I wish I could go pee.

 

[Redlin5_v1legacy]

Granted, enjoy the wet pants.

I wish I could be in better shape.

 

[Emurlahn]

You are now a pentagon, a clearly better shape.

I wish I could be more entertained.

 

[Redlin5_v1legacy]

Granted, a serial killer is amusing you with your intestines with your last few moments of life.

I wish for awesome movies.

 

[The Thinker]

Granted, but they're so awesome your head asplode.

I wish to have omniscience over my aforementioned teacups.

 

[steeple]

granted, you're now, also, a little tea-cup...

I wish for a funny picture to lighten up the graveyard-mood in this thread (because it's dead!)

 

[AwesomeExpress]

Granted, but the picture can only be seen by cats and dogs.

I wish for a smart girlfriend.. but she's not smart enough to leave me or cheat on me.

 

[Redlin5_v1legacy]

Granted, she is on fire. Enjoy the burns.

I wish for garbage.

 

[Robert632]

Granted. The only garbage you receive are used diapers.

I wish for a phone that isn't a piece of crap.

 

[Kae]

Granted now you have a crappy phone from 2000 but it is not made of crap.
I wish for my neighbors to shut the fuck up they are driving me insane.

 

[steeple]

granted, they are now your room-mates...

I wish to be able to dance like m.c. hammer

 

[RussetRanger]

Granted, but that is the only way you can move from now on.



I wish to have Wolverine's claws.

 

[steeple]

(for the record, that wont be that bad when you think about it...)

granted, but you cant heal after you take them in and out.

I wish for a puppy

 

[tobi the good boy]

Granted, It has rabies.
I wish I had a brain in a jar.

 

[steeple]

granted, you're now being arrested for homicide

I wish people would post here more often

 

[RussetRanger]

Granted, but you get a whole cesspool of spam, trolls, flaming warfare and pornographic pictures.

I wish to up my post count.

 

[SixWingedAsura]

Granted, but someone will always have more than you.

I wish I could manipulate causality.

 

[Vrex360]

You can, but only in a way that adversly effects you.

I wish that they never cancelled Firefly.