Ruin-A-Wish Foundation.

[MrCollins]

Your wish is granted but you can no longer afford to pay for the internet as well.

I wish for some sleep

 

[Dr.Susse]

Granted you sleep through a parade in your honor.

I wish for a garden.

 

[MrCollins]

You get a garden, but you live in Scotland as thus can never appreciate it by relaxing in it in the sunshine.

I wish for a tactical FPS

 

[Not G. Ivingname]

Spoiler: Granted!

I wish for world peace!

 

[Dr.Susse]

Granted the world is now in pieces.

I wish for a never ending summer.

 

[Sacman]

Granted... the world has now stopped spinning... and everyone is dead...<.<

I wish for a a sex robot...

 

[Not G. Ivingname]

Spoiler: Granted!

I wish horrible things will happen to who ever grants this wish.

 

[Dr.Susse]

Granted I get horribly drunk and then horribly rich.

I wish for better handwriting.

 

[Not G. Ivingname]

Granted, you write the prettiest comic sans ever seen.

I wish this wish will be granted in the way I intended and not in the just in the what I said.

 

[username sucks]

Granted, but deep down, you intended the wish to be horrible for you in every way possible.

I wish my dog would stop barking.

 

[Dr.Susse]

Granted he is now eating every one of your socks.

I wish for a glass of rum.

 

[The Rookie Gamer]

Granted, the rum is really HCL.

I wish for a serum that will grant me perfect physical fitness forever.

 

[username sucks]

Granted. The side effect is that it will make you incredibly stupid.

I wish for more science classes. MORE SCIENCE.

 

[Dr.Susse]

Granted but it's mostly dark ages science.

I wish for the power to dance all night.

 

[username sucks]

Granted, you have the most extreme dancing endurance ever held by a mortal, but in your dancing craze you forget you are mortal and dance for days until you die of dehydration.

I wish for superpowers.

 

[The Rookie Gamer]

Granted, your superpowers cause you to die within a year due to the strain on your body.

I wish for an immunity to disease.

 

[Not G. Ivingname]

Granted! A marble statue is unaffected by any virus, bacteria, or allergy that touches it!

I wish I could write wishes in such a way that there is no exploitable loopholes in them.

 

[Calibanbutcher]

Granted, but you immediately lose your fingers and the ability to make your wishes known to others.

I wish to be the most powerful being in the universe.

 

[Not G. Ivingname]

Granted, your alone in an empty reality where you can never die. Have fun with eternity!

I wish to have a control of so other wish granting being that doesn't actively try to harm me.

 

[Redlin5_v1legacy]

Granted, it hurts everyone you love instead.

I wish for gambling problems.