Santa doesn't exist!

[Diablo2000]

What about Santa Christ?

That Guy With the Glasses reference?

 

[Anarchemitis]

What about Santa Christ?

That Guy With the Glasses reference?

Only the finest for the patrons of the Escapist.

 

[ninjapenguin981]

I tripped over some presents when I went to check the time. They were from 'Santa' oh, but what were they doing in my parents room :O. I sort of twigged from there.

 

[Thundero13]

My parents always did this whole ridiculously so over the top thing about santa that we never would have believed he was real because my mother thinks it's wrong to lie to children which I completely agree with. a friend of the family said that when she found out santa claus wasn't real she stopped believing in god aswell.

 

[jpoon]

I probably found out at about 10 or so. It didn't break my heart, it wasn't a big deal to me at the time.

 

[interspark]

incidently, if Santa worked with time zones, his task wouldn't be AS impossible as it seems, of course, logic still eludes his ability to fly, break into people's houses and know what everyone wants for christmas

as for the topic, my dad was a cheapskate, so we never celebrated christmas on account of us not being religious (load of crap, i know), hence, i never believed in father christmas

 

[Geekosaurus]

I actually don't remember when I found out. I think I was pretty young though. My older brother probably told me.

 

[interspark]

so in short, in all likelyhood santa was a godlike alien being who spread tidings and good cheer to human societies in their infancy, then left. over time, we intergrated that magical fatman into our religions and cultures, and eventually arrived at a conglomerate of all our experiences (and coca cola ad campaigns) to get the heavily skewed vision of santa we have today.

OF COURSE! IT ALL MAKES SENSE!!!!!

 

[Meestor Pickle]

My mum still pretends he exists even though I'm 18, I have to keep up a charade that I still believe that he exists, bizarrely. Also y'know he wears red because of coca cola, who branded him that way.

I believe he wore green before that didn't he?

 

[Ragnarok2kx]

Finding out Santa doesn't exist is smalltime.
Here's one revelation that will really blow your minds.

Ready?

Kevin Butler isn't real. He's a character made by an ad firm, played by a professional actor.

 

[yizas]

Well i know someone who isnt getting any presents this christmas U.U

 

[Amphoteric]

Santa is a real bastard, the lowest of the low.

Just think about it.

All the rich kids will be getting ALL of the nice stuff while santa thinks to himself, "You know what Fuck Africa."

 

[ryanxm]

You're lying! Liar!
Santa does exist ;~;
If you don't have a chimney, he comes through the gas pipes, or the plumbing ;~;

one time i was using the bathroom and i thought santa was using the toilet to get in but it was just a snake

does that still count?

 

[Tdc2182]

Around third grade my mom went on a website where you write about your kid and pretend to be Santa. It was rather specific, and that kept me going all the way to 5th grade.

 

[Tomany2]

hehhh... i stopped believing when i was 6, found a lego gift in the back room, didn't say a word, than found it from "santa" under the tree on christmas

 

[Gahars]

That's preposterous. Who delivers the presents? Jesus? And if he doesn't exist, who's been keeping the elves' employment up so high that they are never seen.

Obvious troll is obvious, obviously.

 

[pulse2]

Dude, dont be an asshole, Santa is just something for the kids. Its just a fun myth tied in for christmas and your acting like this is some sinister plot or government conspiracy, chill out dude. But what really irks me is that you have the audacity to label all of us as clueless children when u had it in mind to tell us something that was completely obvious to all of us.

Erm, yeah, you do realise it wasn't meant to be taken seriously :/. I only posted the first half to have a bit of a laugh, most of the people replying got the joke and replied with something witty Don't take it as a personal attack. If I really wanted to spoil christmas for people, I would have started with my little sister, she's siz, she believes in Santa and I am determined to make it seem like he's real for her. I have no vandetta against Santa, I am not anti-santa, lol.

When you think about its terrifying.
"Son a big man in a suit will sneak into our house, give you things then fly away on a magic deer"
Why are we not terrifed of him!
Oh right presents.

Its kind of ironic that parents say Santa is coming tonight, yet if they heard something in the middle of the night moving around downstairs, they automatically assume its not Santa and call the police :O

Just now.

You fucker.

But yeah, it didn't come upon me as a sudden epiphany, it just set in somewhere between the age of 10 and 12. Maturity, both physical and emotional, isn't as spontaneous for everyone

Lol, my evils > I think for some it was directly spoilt and others like myself, it just somehow didn't click.


I was told my an antie that Santa has a magical Ferrari when I told her I didn't believe in it any more, at the time I was too young to argue against that, I was under the impression Ferraris were the fastest things on earth

Then I learnt about the Bugatti Veyron.

 

[Woodsey]

My mum still pretends he exists even though I'm 18, I have to keep up a charade that I still believe that he exists, bizarrely. Also y'know he wears red because of coca cola, who branded him that way.

I think that's actually a myth - although they popularised the red and white outfit (but not invented it).

 

[ViaticalTarsier]

Never believed in santa as my parents where of the opinion "why lie to your kids". I never felt like I was missing out because I was just as happy to get my toys and could care less who they came from.

 

[brainslurper]

You're lying! Liar!
Santa does exist ;~;
If you don't have a chimney, he comes through the gas pipes, or the plumbing ;~;

yeah like that one time when i was going to the bathroom... and then...