Seriously, why do some guys pull this shit?

[Gamblerjoe]

Why do guys pull this shit?!

He vaguely reminds me of someone I knew who knew who kept bothering one of my friends, although that guy didn't do anything besides stare(which was really creepy and really pissed her off.)

Wait, what? People pull shit like this?
I've never, ever seen this happen.

The first notable time I've witnessed something like it was this summer. Luckily they're now a couple states away from each other.

I hate to be a jerk, but these guys don't deserve a girl. They just need to be ejected from the playing field.

That's going a bit far, and is beyond being a jerk. And what do you mean "ejected from the playing field"?

I'm talking about the proverbial "field" i.e. the dating field. Im not saying they need to be killed if that's what you think. Also, I lied. I don't hate to be a jerk.

I don't see my statement as going too far at all. How does any girl deserve that kind of albatross?

 

[Herr Uhl]

I don't see my statement as going too far at all. How does any girl deserve that kind of albatross?

There are girls that are just as bad. Perfect match.

 

[TheYellowCellPhone]

He's lonely, probably clingy and desperate. He's hoping that getting a girlfried will help his problems, and you're the girl who he knows the best, so he probably think he's skipping a few steps ahead.

It's unsurprising to me.

 

[Giftfromme]

Seriously, this guy doesn't know shit about me and yet he's making all these comments as if he could convince me to dump my boyfriend and instead date him when he doesn't have a real job and no car and constantly whines about crap...

Why do guys pull this shit?!

I sympathise with your situation and all. You seem to be on the receiving end of a right creepy bastard. Just cut the guy out of your life as quickly and as painlessly as you can. Well, it'll be painless for you. He'll be distraught, but fuck him (no, don't do that) he doesn't have a right to feel upset over this.

That being said, I'm kind of concerned with the lines I emboldened up there. I'm pretty sure you're just venting, this guy is pissing you off and you want to fire off a few insultes. I get that and I commend you for it. We all love to vent. But let me play devil's advocate - 'real' jobs are hard to come by at the moment. Job security is virtually non-existant for most people. I hope your low opinion of this guy is based on his creepy and whiney behaviour and not on how much money he makes.

But I'm just a goofball on the internet, my opinions are just that - opinions.

Yeah but if she cuts him out of her life, she will have nothing to complain about. I completely sympathise in this situation, and it best to keep him around and invent excuses as to why she keeps talking to him, even though she finds a lot of behaviour and mannerisms distasteful. And clearly does not wish to talk to him anymore

 

[Gamblerjoe]

I hate to be a jerk, but these guys don't deserve a girl. They just need to be ejected from the playing field.

That's going a bit far, and is beyond being a jerk. And what do you mean "ejected from the playing field"?

Getting ostracized from society? Send him to a tiny uninhabited island and drop off provisions every two weeks.

Actually that's even better than what I was thinking. He wouldn't need a car or job. He can just sit there and have everything he needs delivered to him. It seems to be what he wants. win/win!

 

[TheVioletBandit]

Try not to generalize a gender based on this one guys actions. Which has always confused me. Personally I don't flirt, in fact I barley interact with other people but I have overheard a lot of conversations in my college classes and watched human interaction from the back of the room, so I may know a little about it. Firstly any attention giving to this guy can be misleading, as he may see any interaction as a sign that you are into him. So if you truly can't stand people pining over you, if the very thought that others may find you attractive makes you sick, if you find the desires of those who you find undesirable as gross, then simply stop talking to him.

 

[Jedoro]

Yup, trying to guilt you into doing something with him. Dude cares more about himself than you, so I'd say don't even be friends with him anymore.

 

[Zeema]

People like talking about people. Makes us feel superior. Makes us feel in control. And sometimes, for some people, knowing some things makes them care.

 

[SnakeoilSage]

I say record examples of things he says does and when. If he gets weird and stalkerish, you'll have plenty of evidence to get that restraining order.

You'd think you wouldn't need one; just tell the guy you're not interested in dating and all this touchy-feely closeness is really awkward and uncomfortable for you. If he has any ounce of respect for you at all he'll accept he's done wrong and leave you alone even if it upsets him. If he does anything else, well he's only in it for himself and your refusal to shape yourself according to his desire could make him even more pushy. If that does occur make sure you keep your friends and family informed of his actions - the more people who know to watch out for him, the better a heads up you'll get if he won't move on.

 

[CardinalPiggles]

Sounds like he has some issues, no need to generalise here.

Your probably going to want to be forceful in your approach to telling him to stay away from you, but not too rude either.

If you give him even a hint of hope, he will cling to that forever.

If you completely humiliate him then he may get a bit forceful himself, please be careful.

 

[Rawne1980]

Why do guys pull this shit?!

Whoa there cupcake....

Lets not lump all us blokes in the same pan as the depressingly desperate ones shall we.

Some of us are quite capable of finding our own women without resorting to shit like that.

And that is also why I never, eeeever, tried anything with women i'm friends with .. or worked with (that can get awkward).

If me and my wife ever split up and it got to the stage where i'm telling women I know that i'm horny or try and guilt trip them into a date then I know it's time to tie a knot in my penis and resign myself to singledom ... and internet porn.

Luckily my wife doesn;t want to string me up with my own intestines yet but give her a few more years, she's very tolerant I just haven't annoyed her enough yet.

 

[cthulhumythos]

have you considered getting him neutered? i'm sure that would solve your problem.

 

[teebeeohh]

why do you even hang out with someone like that? he seems rather annoying.
and guys do this because they are really weird. I remember during my teenage years lot's of my friends were like this because they had trouble talking to girls and whenever they did manage to talk to one on a regular basis they got very clingy. Depending on how old the guy is he may just never have left that phase.

Oh and girls pull this kinda shit too.

 

[Rin Little]

Luckily my wife doesn;t want to string me up with my own intestines yet but give her a few more years, she's very tolerant I just haven't annoyed her enough yet.

String you up by your intestines? Youch, that sounds harsh and very Hannibal Lector-esque

 

[strangemoose]

tell him no means no and if that doesn't make him stop tell him to go fuck himself and stay out of your life if he wants to keep acting like this

 

[Laser Priest]

lol generalizations.

But yeah, that's just an idiot, most likely the kind of guy who complains about being stuck in the "friendzone". I say you tell him to stop being such an arse (although maybe put it a bit more lightly) and if he doesn't, then just join the list of people who ignore him.

 

[Jubbert]

If a guy IM's you that he's really horny when you're not in a relationship, that's is one creepy as fuck move.

Tell him to back the fuck off.

 

[Dr Snakeman]

I don't see my statement as going too far at all. How does any girl deserve that kind of albatross?

There are girls that are just as bad. Perfect match.

That made me laugh. I like your solution. Let's just pair up all the horrible people in the world and keep them all in one terrible place. Like Greenland. Seriously, who needs that awful, frozen piece of earth?

Also, you reminded me of this:

 

[Moonlight Butterfly]

Maybe you could be kind and up front with him with how you see his behaviour rather than laugh at him on a public forum behind his back...

But I guess that would be far too honest and compassionate.

I think I'm in a bad mood tonight...

 

[Grant Hobba]

If you won't date someone without a car, some would call you a gold digger ^.^

most girls lead guys on... whether they want to or not... even if they know it or not. by not responding with (I DO NOT WANT TO DATE YOU ) ... boys wont get the hint ^.^ some are very thick..