So...I screwed up.

[Lullabye]

Hmmm, this makes me....feel sad. The group of friends I hang around with, they all grope each other and do other less than admirable things, but they are all okay with it. It makes me sick really, how some people become when they hit puberty. Unfortunately, my not being promiscuous has led to a sort of alienation, they likes of which can only be described by my acclaimed friends as "lolwut?" I don't know why I even talk to people like this any more. Perhaps we both need to take a lesson and not hang around with sex crazed animals.
For the girlfriend.....well, it depends on her personality. I assume she became your gf for a reason. Remember that reason.

 

[Bernzz]

I also think that you and your friend were not being very clever, betting about groping girls at a party and daring each other. I know you are young but such things will only get you into trouble. I would strongly suggest that you desist such behaviour and have more respect for people, regardless of their gender.

tell her it won't happen again, make sure it never happens again,

BUT, DON'T DO IT AGAIN. SILLY BOY.

To answer all three of you, I have actually told myself that I will never do something like that again if I am in a relationship. If ever the opportunity for a boob grab arises again, the first thing that'll pop into my mind will be this incident. That's a very strong discouragement for me.

 

[lvl9000_woot]

Dude, if you're in a relationship, here's some golden rules:

-Look but don't touch.

-Use common sense and self control.

-If you can't manage either of the first two, don't date.

BUUUUT as bluepilot says "you are still young" so you've got plenty of time to run around and have fun. Enjoy it while you can.

 

[JohanGasMask]

well its not like you kissed the other girl that you where groping, and your girl did not dump you so shes just upset, she´l get over it. Also ,you told her that you where messing around with that other girl so when you do some stubit shit like that , you´l tell her

 

[Brad Shepard]

you made a mistake, it happens man, just try to tell her it will never happen again and hope she trusts you.

 

[Snork Maiden]

Now, Escapists, I ask you. First, what you think of my actions. Second, what you think I could do to possibly ever have a hope of winning back the trust of my girlfriend? Or if you think I should just end it with her completely? I ask for opinions on these questions, and whatever else you want to add to the discussion.

In a way that makes me sound as uncreepy as possible, grabbing friends is something I can get away with and do - I'm the annoying twat, obviously. That said, the only reason this is even slightly possible is because (in the grand scheme of things) its not that big a deal. Your girlfriend being sad is understandable, but if the relationship is really going to be serious and meaningful this is the kind of thing that you have to work past - if you break up now (through either of you walking away) then the relationship (while undoubtedly as fun as you describe) simply can't be that important to either of you.

So yeah. Keep going, move on.

 

[Kathinka]

Hmmm, this makes me....feel sad. The group of friends I hang around with, they all grope each other and do other less than admirable things, but they are all okay with it. It makes me sick really, how some people become when they hit puberty. Unfortunately, my not being promiscuous has led to a sort of alienation, they likes of which can only be described by my acclaimed friends as "lolwut?" I don't know why I even talk to people like this any more. Perhaps we both need to take a lesson and not hang around with sex crazed animals.
For the girlfriend.....well, it depends on her personality. I assume she became your gf for a reason. Remember that reason.

a little offtoppic but...is this seriously that common over there? here when a guy tries to touch a girl without permission, he has a fair chance to get the mace for it^^

 

[GruntOwner]

Your solution is simple. Extasy and tencho music (nightclub optional) followed by a groupsex orgy where all inhibitions and pre-formed opinions are lost in a haze of drugs and post-coitial bliss.


Failing that, claim Man Code and get mad at her for being mad at you over something you clearly had no choice in.

The man code is only applicable above certain ages, depending on your home. Same applies for the nightclub one. Great suggestions, though.

OT: God willing she'll be reasonable enough to know that your breach of trust isn't actually that bad, seeing as you told her face to face and regret it like nobody's business. Assuming nothing like this has happened before, which I'm GUESSING it hasn't, you should be able to salvage it.

How exactly this has hit your friendship might be a factor. If you're adopting one of those awful "bros before hoes" stands then, well, tough break.

 

[Paragon Fury]

I really don't know what to say here. I mean, you did break the first rule of women, one I think even kids get:


Rule #1: NO TOUCHING WITHOUT EXPRESS CONSTENT OF THE TOUCHEE. This rule may only be violated if the touchee's life is danger and is in need of assitance.



So I can't really say I feel sorry for you, or anything other than that you're a freakin' idiot. You didn't think something through, and now you've got to pay whatever the due is.

 

[MiracleOfSound]

Your actions were indeed stupid.

But the fact that you came out and told her straight away will show her you at least have honestly in you and genuinely seem to regret it and want to make it up to her.

You got some serious sucking up to do...

 

[Lullabye]

Hmmm, this makes me....feel sad. The group of friends I hang around with, they all grope each other and do other less than admirable things, but they are all okay with it. It makes me sick really, how some people become when they hit puberty. Unfortunately, my not being promiscuous has led to a sort of alienation, they likes of which can only be described by my acclaimed friends as "lolwut?" I don't know why I even talk to people like this any more. Perhaps we both need to take a lesson and not hang around with sex crazed animals.
For the girlfriend.....well, it depends on her personality. I assume she became your gf for a reason. Remember that reason.

a little offtoppic but...is this seriously that common over there? here when a guy tries to touch a girl without permission, he has a fair chance to get the mace for it^^

...hmm, well the thing is with a big country like ours(Canada, the second largest in the world) people in living in different parts generally act different. East coast is definitely more family oriented, and generally nicer. But it kinda dislikes outsiders who disrupt the fun, so......kinda like an Irish Japan? But yeah, living here in Calgary is basically like living in a giant mosh pit. Most people have little or no respect for one another and its really very sad. I miss living by the ocean, living with a big family in a town, where everyone knew each other and everyone helped one another.....No groping either.

 

[BonsaiK]

big post

This problem has been answered in the Relationship Problem Thread, which is at the following link: ---> http://www.escapistmagazine.com/forums/read/18.117161?page=21#4586256

 

[sniperworm]

I think you messed up big time. I doubt you can ever get the trust back into the relationship

Two months in and he'll never get trust back?

Two months is hardly enough time to even establish any sort of undying trust.

Everyone is different, In my current relationship before 2 months in I had booked a ticket to travel to a country I had never been too before and where I didn't speak the language to meet my girlfriend (First time travelling alone too). And on the same hand my girlfriend offered to put up a crazy person she found on the internet.

Trust can be instant, just like love

 

[Woodsey]

Well, you've learnt an important lesson:

Honesty is most certainly not the best policy.

 

[Monkfish Acc.]

First question: You're an idiot. What is wrong with you.
In future, don't grab people's tits.
Seriously. What the fuck were you thinking.

Second question: Possibly. But you're going to have to earn it.
You fucked up, sure. But at least you were honest about it, and seem to regret it.
You have a lot of sucking up ahead of you. The next few weeks of your life are going to have to be entirely dedicated to trying to make it up to this girl.
Assuming you actually care enough to keep her, that is.

 

[Plurralbles]

Well, you wouldn't want her to grab a guy's crotch so, yes you did screw up. Good luck.

 

[MurderousToaster]

Play the 'I was pissed' card.

Pissed as in drunk. Not the silly American meaning of angry.

 

[Trivun]

Dude, you screwed up big time. However, your girlfriend hasn't broken up with you, which means that she's giving you a chance to make up for it. Now, I don't personally see a five second joke grope as cheating. If you'd been snogging the girl's face off, then yes, that would be cheating. A five second joke grope among friends isn't. But your girlfriend doesn't see it that way, and I don't blame her. If I was in her position I'd be pretty pissed off too.

Now, you did the right thing by coming clean straight away. That helped salvage a little bit, however miniscule, of trust between you two. But she's no doubt going to keep this hanging over you for quite a while. Which means you basically don't ever mention it again, and you make sure your girlfriend is always happy now. Stay in her good books by just doing whatever she wants you to. Don't complain, don't argue, just do it, and prove to her that you can be trusted again. She's giving you a lifeline, which basically means one more screwup and that's it. Over. But while you have this chance, do whatever you can to make things right with her. Talk to her and see how you can try and prove to her that you still love her.

Oh, and sever all ties with this other girl, at least until the crisis is averted. Don't talk to her, don't text her, don't email her, basically make it seem as if you and this other girl have never met. That's a great way then to get back in your girlfriend's good books. And good luck

 

[derelict]

To answer first: You're an idiot. To answer second, see first, and add probably not.

Seriously though, you're young I imagine so it's not like it's the last girl you'll ever have, so as its been stated, you've got plenty of time to enjoy yourself before any need to settle down. All depends on what you're up for, but if you're up for the fun and games, I'd suggest finding a girl that's into the short term thing, that way you're not inadvertently ruining years of someone elses life.

 

[Gxas]

I think you messed up big time. I doubt you can ever get the trust back into the relationship

Two months in and he'll never get trust back?

Two months is hardly enough time to even establish any sort of undying trust.

Everyone is different, In my current relationship before 2 months in I had booked a ticket to travel to a country I had never been too before and where I didn't speak the language to meet my girlfriend (First time travelling alone too). And on the same hand my girlfriend offered to put up a crazy person she found on the internet.

Trust can be instant, just like love

You lucky dog. I mean, even for just having balls enough to be able to do that.

I'll agree, situations are different, and I'm realizing that every day. But I just can't let go of my past experiences. My ex didn't trust me for the entire 2.5 years we were together. It hurt, especially when we broke up because she "couldn't trust me".