Stolen Pixels #241: The Gaming Afterlife

demoap

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Jan 1, 2010
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....it is 'the COOKS are French' and 'the lOVERS Italian'.......(no, french aren't good 'lovers', but they make more 'love' than the entire europe)....
....Back to the point....
Square plots are very bad (culture shock maibe?),and their cutscenes to,really it's a bunch of lightning balls and girl with wet clothes..... very original....and $$$$$$$$
 

TraderJimmy

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Apr 17, 2010
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demoap said:
really it's a bunch of lightning balls and girl with wet clothes
Wait. Wait.

That's BAD?!

I mean, even if you hate girls in wet clothes, the lightning balls would naturally be drawn to them, cancelling out both problems.

Also I disagree, but eh.
 

aaronmcc

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Oct 18, 2008
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demoap said:
....it is 'the COOKS are French' and 'the lOVERS Italian'.......(no, french aren't good 'lovers', but they make more 'love' than the entire europe)....
Really? As far as I can tell they are all playing Halo Reach and speaking very quickly into the mic so I have no hope in hell of even a basic translation!
 

TheDoctor455

Friendly Neighborhood Time Lord
Apr 1, 2009
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Yeah... its always weird how NPC dialogue in a Bioware game is so much better than the dialog that the PC has... well... except in Dragon Age... its pretty even in that game.
 

Divine Miss Bee

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Feb 16, 2010
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i say, instead of valve, you could have gone with blizzard for the last hell panel (starcraft 2, diablo 3, the list goes on and on). "or 3D realms," says the man on my shoulder.
 

kurokotetsu

Proud Master
Sep 17, 2008
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Freakin' hilarious. Especially the Bioware panel And the joke seems pretty true. British cuisine is terrible but you feel safe in the steets (when I went to England I ended up eating Indian all the time, and in a pub they tried to sell me "Haggis Balls" as a great dish), Italian are disorganized as hell with good cuisine (every time I've goen there is a strike soemwher over something stupid) and French women, if they are half as good as ebd as they look, they are going to rock your world (no first person experience, but the sights are really nice) and in Switzerland everything runs like a clock but people are somewhat unfreindly.
 

HentMas

The Loneliest Jedi
Apr 17, 2009
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TraderJimmy said:
demoap said:
really it's a bunch of lightning balls and girl with wet clothes
Wait. Wait.

That's BAD?!

I mean, even if you hate girls in wet clothes, the lightning balls would naturally be drawn to them, cancelling out both problems.

Also I disagree, but eh.
shiny things and wet girl??

why dont they hire squarenix to make all the cutscenes again?????
 

Tempest13

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Aug 23, 2010
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XD Capcom cutscenes. Makes me think of DMC4. "Oh hey, this is pretty cool. Why can't I do this?"
 

Vorocano

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Jan 8, 2009
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There's also an old saw about Canadians similar to the European joke that I thought I'd add:

"Canada was in the unique position of being able to enjoy British culture, French cuisine, and American technology. Instead what they got was American culture, British cuisine, and French technology."

Great comic all around Shamus! (I myself would have gone with "only a little" to the ball-punching question, though.)
 

demoap

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Jan 1, 2010
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HentMas said:
TraderJimmy said:
demoap said:
really it's a bunch of lightning balls and girl with wet clothes
Wait. Wait.

That's BAD?!

I mean, even if you hate girls in wet clothes, the lightning balls would naturally be drawn to them, cancelling out both problems.

Also I disagree, but eh.
shiny things and wet girl??

why dont they hire squarenix to make all the cutscenes again?????
Cutscenes tend to demonstrate important pieces of the game design (being it interactive or not), taking the player out of the protagonist posicion, making them a mere spectator. It is a momentary feature of the game and should not be used just to have wet girls on the escrem...
 

HK_01

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Jun 1, 2009
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Absolutely brilliant! Especially the last line (We're gonna need more time than that").

Anyway, I've played most Bioware games but I still don't get why they're both the best (well, I do get that) and the worst.
 

Irony's Acolyte

Back from the Depths
Mar 9, 2010
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Well that was pretty funny. I have to agree with all your choices for who does what with the game.

"But... zis game iz perfekt!" We can do better than that!"

Of course its entirely true that Valve is extremly bad when it comes to coming out with games at the right time. They are able to come out with Portal, TF2, all the TF2 updates, and both L4Ds but they still have yet to come out with Episode 3 for HL2. The only other company that I can think of that comes out with games so slowly is Blizzard, but then that would ruin the comic.

All in all very funny. And I also liked the little thing on Europeans towards the bottom.
 

Shamus Young

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Jul 7, 2008
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Vorocano said:
There's also an old saw about Canadians similar to the European joke that I thought I'd add:

"Canada was in the unique position of being able to enjoy British culture, French cuisine, and American technology. Instead what they got was American culture, British cuisine, and French technology."

Great comic all around Shamus! (I myself would have gone with "only a little" to the ball-punching question, though.)
Renegade!
 

Xelt

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May 11, 2008
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I found that pretty funny, the square story though.. I liked how it sounded.