Stupid questions about yourself people always ask you.

[Darren716]

Gosh you're tall, do you play basket ball? I wouldn't mind so much if it wasn't for every person at family friend event or party asks that as soon as they meet me, every, single, time.

 

[FuzzyRaccoon]

Until very recently I was too poor to afford oral surgery for my front teeth. So they looked pretty bad and it was really stressful. But people always asked me about them.

YEAH I KNOW THEY'RE UGLY. Guess who has to live with them every damn day? Ugh it drove me crazy.

 

[Dalisclock]

I get asked a lot of questions about my job, no one seems to know what an archivist actually does. XD

It's not that stupid, to be fair, it's not the most popular of professions. I'm so tired of trying to explain it though, I think I might just start lying about what I do.

I get the same. I'm a Fire Controlman.

"So you're a fire fighter?"

No. Even people in the Navy have said to me, "Oh, you do damage control?"

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Fire_Controlman

For me, it's the fact that a lot of people who see me wearing my Digi-Blue-Camo for some reason assume I'm in the Air Force. You know, despite the "US Navy" on the front, the little ship under the pocket and the fact the ocean is blue.

 

[FuzzyRaccoon]

When people wonder about my nationality. I tell them I'm Hispanic, and then have the urge to murder them since this about how 90% of my conversations on that subject goes:
"Woah, you're really Hispanic?"
"Yup."
"Why do you talk, act, and look a white person and where's your accent? Can you speak Spanish?!"
"......... No I don't speak Spanish."
*then they remark how I'm not worthy of being Hispanic because i'm None of the Above*

What I really want to say: "SHUT YOUR MOUTH AND LISTEN!!! MY PARENTS WERE BORN IN MEXICO, THEY CAME HERE, THEY DIDN'T TEACH ME ANY SPANISH, MORON. I LIVED WITH MY MOM FOR MOST OF MY LIFE WHO GOT RID OF HER ACCENT AND PASSED HER LINGO ON TO ME, ASS WIPE. I'M A LITTLE PALE BECAUSE I DON'T GO OUT OFTEN, YOU DICK. AND NEWS FLASH, MOST OF FAMILY IS OF A HISPANIC HERITAGE WETHER WE/I ACT THAT WAY OR NOT, DEAL WITH IT NERD. SO SORRY IF I DON'T FIT WHAT YOU SEE AS OUR CULTURAL STEREOTYPES.... I'LL MAKE DOUBLY SURE TO WEAR A SOMBRERO AND EAT A BURRITO WHILE RIDING A DONKEY NEXT TIME WE TALK, YOU GODDAMN PLEB."

What I actually say:
"...I know right?" *screams internally*

Yeah you know I'm Hispanic too and this is really shitty. My parents weren't of that mind but it's really annoying how judgmental people get about this. It's not like you had any control of the situation, but the second I bring a Hispanic friend over that can't speak Spanish my parents just kind of talk shit about them...? Like they have any control over what their parents decide for them?

 

[sageoftruth]

Have you killed someone? or Do you like Killing people?

Geeze people, I get it I have a scar on my eye and I generally look like badass but really?
I normally get really pissed off when they ask this and answer with, "Only if they ask too many questions" while doing my best Clint Eastwood impersonation, they normally stop after that, but it's ridiculous that people keep asking me this.

Where on Earth are you from? That's not the sort of question I'd hear anyone ask in my neighborhood.

 

[Johnson McGee]

I'm doing my PhD (is there anyway to say that so it doesn't sound like humblebrag?) and a typical response is: Are you a genius?

How? How do I answer that question truthfully and not sound like a shit?

"No, I just worked hard and focused."
"I just tend to learn things quickly."
"Yes, my intellect far exceeds yours pitiful wage-slave."

I've tried them all and it always make me think that I sound awful when I say it.

The other is when I refuse an alcoholic drink, "Why don't you drink?" Does it matter? I don't want to get drunk, I don't want to pay that much for a fancy glass of coke, I think alcoholic drinks taste like I'm getting them second-hand (which from my knowledge of fermentation is basically the case). All equally valid and true reasons that don't affect the outcome at all.

 

[Johnson McGee]

"Can you tell what I'm thinking ?" (I graduated in psychology)

You're thinking "I wonder what he's going to say I'm thinking?"

alternately: "Is [insert sexual perversion here] normal?"

 

[agent9]

I think the stupidest question I've been asked was what part of mexico is Puerto Rico. I was so dumbfounded that I just left.

 

[Kae]

Have you killed someone? or Do you like Killing people?

Geeze people, I get it I have a scar on my eye and I generally look like badass but really?
I normally get really pissed off when they ask this and answer with, "Only if they ask too many questions" while doing my best Clint Eastwood impersonation, they normally stop after that, but it's ridiculous that people keep asking me this.

Where on Earth are you from? That's not the sort of question I'd hear anyone ask in my neighborhood.

From México, I've lived in some very bad parts so I have been around drug dealers and such, though they mostly ask this because I usually cover the lower half of my face with a scarf and my left eye has a scar, so I do look kinda suspicious but it still pisses me off, people always stare though because of the scar and I like dressing like a bandit and since people will stare anyway I may as well dress however I fucking please.

 

[Creator002]

Oh yeah, getting randomly asked "what's wrong?" or "what's the matter?" for no good reason.

I usually have a pretty blank expression on my face which often gets taken for being down, so I get asked that often as well. Even by my family who should know by now (I'm less than a month off being 23) what my default expression is like.

 

[FPLOON]

"How black/white are you?"

I'm not sure I should blame myself for usually leading conversations to this particular question overall... or blame whoever gave out the list of questions someone should ask me at least once...

"Why don't you have a girlfriend?"

I will always answer this question with a "I don't know" and nothing else... >.>

"Do you smoke weed/Are you high right now?"

Just because I can talk like a stoner, walk like a stoner, laugh like a stoner, and/or dance-walk like I'm stoned does not make it so...

So far, no one has asked those three questions in one particular conversation... Also, with the exception of the girlfriend question, I'm usually happy enough to answer them both honestly and jokingly, anyway...

 

[Tuesday Night Fever]

I'm colourblind, first thing people ask when I tell them: "So... what does this look like to you?"

This gets on my nerves sooo fast. Especially since in my case it wasn't genetic. When I was little I had perfectly normal color vision, but thanks to a little bit of "boys will be boys" rough-housing with one of my cousins I ended up with an eye injury that caused it. So now my color vision is all sorts of messed up.

For me, pretty much every color is just a little bit... off. I occasionally confuse blues and purples, reds and browns, yellows and greens... and I almost always have trouble when it comes to various shades of colors. Large color palettes and gradients always are a nightmare to me. Back when I tried to play that MMO Tabula Rasa, I had to set all of my character's color options to white, because you chose the colors on a gradient and I had no idea what the hell I was looking at. To be honest, I don't even know if I chose white. Sometimes white and lighter shades of pink and gray all look the same to me.

So inevitably, the first question someone will ask me is what color something in the immediate vicinity is. If I get it right, they almost always give me a look of disappointment, then point to something else. And they'll keep freaking doing it until I get something wrong, then they'll act like it's some kind of sideshow attraction. Fuck you, people. Seriously.

Even worse is when they find out I wasn't born with it, because then they have it in their mind that I have a frame of reference as to what NORMAL people see. So then the questions start to pour in about that. Nevermind that I was like four when the injury happened, and I can only vaguely recall anything from that far back. So I really don't have that frame of reference, which also will inevitably get me looks of disappointment, and the occasional asshole that thinks I'm lying to them for some reason, like I'm selfishly keeping some kind of mystical secret of the universe all to myself.

The worst is that they seem to think my entire life revolves around it. They sometimes even treat it like it's a major disability. Not really, guys... I can still make due just fine. Just because I don't see colors the exact same way as you doesn't mean I can't see colors and learn to associate certain colors with certain things. You have no idea how hard I want to backhand the morons that ask me what color the sky is.

THE SKY IS BLUE YOU MORON!

 

[Tony2077]

I'm colourblind, first thing people ask when I tell them: "So... what does this look like to you?"

This gets on my nerves sooo fast. Especially since in my case it wasn't genetic. When I was little I had perfectly normal color vision, but thanks to a little bit of "boys will be boys" rough-housing with one of my cousins I ended up with an eye injury that caused it. So now my color vision is all sorts of messed up.

For me, pretty much every color is just a little bit... off. I occasionally confuse blues and purples, reds and browns, yellows and greens... and I almost always have trouble when it comes to various shades of colors. Large color palettes and gradients always are a nightmare to me. Back when I tried to play that MMO Tabula Rasa, I had to set all of my character's color options to white, because you chose the colors on a gradient and I had no idea what the hell I was looking at. To be honest, I don't even know if I chose white. Sometimes white and lighter shades of pink and gray all look the same to me.

So inevitably, the first question someone will ask me is what color something in the immediate vicinity is. If I get it right, they almost always give me a look of disappointment, then point to something else. And they'll keep freaking doing it until I get something wrong, then they'll act like it's some kind of sideshow attraction. Fuck you, people. Seriously.

Even worse is when they find out I wasn't born with it, because then they have it in their mind that I have a frame of reference as to what NORMAL people see. So then the questions start to pour in about that. Nevermind that I was like four when the injury happened, and I can only vaguely recall anything from that far back. So I really don't have that frame of reference, which also will inevitably get me looks of disappointment, and the occasional asshole that thinks I'm lying to them for some reason, like I'm selfishly keeping some kind of mystical secret of the universe all to myself.

The worst is that they seem to think my entire life revolves around it. They sometimes even treat it like it's a major disability. Not really, guys... I can still make due just fine. Just because I don't see colors the exact same way as you doesn't mean I can't see colors and learn to associate certain colors with certain things. You have no idea how hard I want to backhand the morons that ask me what color the sky is.

THE SKY IS BLUE YOU MORON!

its interesting how many people don't really understand something
i don't think I've personally been asked anything stupid
I'm a anti social person with a.d.d

 

[The Eupho Guy_v1legacy]

"You still play that thing, right? The one that goes /That trumpet thing".

*sigh* Yes, I still play an instrument and its still called a euphonium, just like the last time you asked.

I get that its not the easiest name to remember and its not a common instrument, even within the brass family of instruments. But if it is the first thing you ask me *every* time you see me, surely you would take the time to learn what the bloody thing is called.

 

[SmugFrog]

For me, it's the fact that a lot of people who see me wearing my Digi-Blue-Camo for some reason assume I'm in the Air Force. You know, despite the "US Navy" on the front, the little ship under the pocket and the fact the ocean is blue.

I was wearing peanut butters a few months ago and had to visit someone in the hospital - a lady walking out with me asked, "Are you in the Marines?" I saw that confusion coming when we made this uniform switch.

You know why we wear the the blue NWU and coveralls, right? So out at sea if we fall overboard we're easier to see... no wait... what?

 

[Jesterscup]

As my Drag-Queen persona ( "Mistress Sinestra" )

1."So, are you gay?"
2."Do you want to be a woman?"
3."Can I be your slave"
4."what do you like in a man"

In my day-to-day life ( as a web developer)
5."can you make/fix my website"

ok perhaps not stupid questions, but I make an effort to give interesting answers:
1. Actually I prefer transgender furrys
2.nope, see 1
3. actually 1 works for all the answers,,,,
4. yup still.... see 3.
5. ( oh why not...) see 4.

I do stand up comedy from time to time as well, So I get a lot of "are you funny" :-/ ( WTH ) & "Tell me a joke" unfortunately, I do humorous monologues, and my jokes are really,really bad.

 

[Starbird]

As a white South African living in Japan: "Why aren't you black?". Followed by "are your parents black?".

Oh and my personal favorite: "Do you like music?".

 

[happyninja42]

I used to get asked if I played basketball when I was in my teens and 20s. I am fairly tall, and back then, very thin and athletic build. So you know, of course I play basketball, cause that's what all tall skinny men do right?

It got so frequent, that as a not so subtle bit of "fuck you" to the people who would ask, I got a t-shirt airbrushed saying in big angry, firey red letters "NO!! I DO NOT PLAY BASKETBALL!!"

 

[happyninja42]

*then they remark how I'm not worthy of being Hispanic because i'm None of the Above*

Is this coming from others in the Hispanic community? I ask because that seems like a strange thing for someone of another ethnicity to declare about you. It seems, if not smart, at least more understandable to hear from another Hispanic. I mean if it's some Anglo-Saxon declaring "well you're not really Hispanic then" I'd be like "...the fuck you know about it pal?! You're not Hispanic either!"

I ask because I've actually heard of this happening in the African-American community. One of my co-workers told me about an experience he ran into, where an African-American woman at a store he was at, declared that he wasn't "really Black", because he spoke without a ghetto accent, hadn't ever tasted coller greens, and several other minor little quirks of his personality that apparently didn't toe the "African-American Line". So she actually said to him "well you're not really Black then" *facepalm* This was funny, to both him and me, since he is very much full blooded African-American, and just happens to have grown up in the north, and thus doesn't have the Southern social quirks.

 

[Elementary - Dear Watson]

I get asked a lot of questions about my job, no one seems to know what an archivist actually does. XD

It's not that stupid, to be fair, it's not the most popular of professions. I'm so tired of trying to explain it though, I think I might just start lying about what I do.

Archivist sounds like a job in FFV or Bravely Default! What are your special attacks?

Have you killed someone? or Do you like Killing people?

Geeze people, I get it I have a scar on my eye and I generally look like badass but really?
I normally get really pissed off when they ask this and answer with, "Only if they ask too many questions" while doing my best Clint Eastwood impersonation, they normally stop after that, but it's ridiculous that people keep asking me this.

I have a scar just above my eye too... Although I have had it for only a month. I too have started getting questions. They presume that because I am in the military that it was something cool... when in fact I was just bitten by a dog when drunk! :S

How did you get yours? Have you killed someone? Did you like it?

OT:
Something that I get EVERY. SINGLE. DAMN. TIME. I am offered a tea, is a look of confusion and a clarification.

• 
  Them: 'Brew?'
  Me: 'Ooh, yes please. Black none.' (Whoopee Goldberg)
  Them: 'What, Tea?'
  Me: 'Errr.... Yeah?'
  Them: 'Black Tea?'
  Me: 'Yes.'
  Them: 'Oh. Well that's odd...' Walks off

Seriously... it's not that odd! I just like it that way... actually taste the tea then!