Ten Movies That Will Never Be

Recommended Videos

Voodoomancer

New member
Jun 8, 2009
2,243
0
0
How about this: An action movie, featuring explosions, gunfights, high-speed chases, jumping aboard a moving train, etc., without a squeamie romance subplot.

"Action" film today are usually one part action, one part exposition and two parts forced cliché'd romance subplot.
 

Phuctifyno

New member
Jul 6, 2010
417
0
0
A foreign terrorist organization takes a group of hostages in a metropolitan area. A gruff, irritable Vietnam vet, who's also the best of the best, is tracked down by the military to infiltrate the operation and secure the hostages. Explosions and one-liners ensue. Once all of the terrorists have been killed (the head honcho in a particularly gruesome and slo-mo fashion), the hostages are secured. The most attractive female of the hostage group throws herself lustily at the heroic vet, declaring her everlasting impulsive love that will last forever, and she begins to kiss him. He tosses her off and says "Sorry, I'm gay." and begins to furiously make out with the comic relief. Then things take a bloody, satanic turn as all the children's eyes start to glow and maniacal laughter can be heard from inside the walls. The cat doesn't survive.
 

hooksashands

New member
Apr 11, 2010
550
0
0
ascorbius said:
I love the Ong Bak one at the end. Although it's probably unfair to use that movie as the base for the joke as it's A: Not a Hollywood movie, B: A spectacular action showpiece and C: Really good.
Agreed, though I liked The Protector (Tom Yung Gong) more.

WHERE'S MY ELEPHANT?!
 

GamerFromJump

New member
Sep 28, 2009
65
0
0
I've got one:

A crew of space explorers comes upon a derelict ship of alien design, with the crew in apparent hibernation. Deciding that they can't simply leave the aliens to drift, the humans decide to repair the ship. When the aliens suddenly come out of their hibernation, they....

...thank the humans profusely for their kindness and go on their way, promising to tell of the good beings that helped them in their time of need.