The Best Iphone Games

Carnagath

New member
Apr 18, 2009
1,814
0
0
Not gonna buy any Apple products I'm afraid. They are horrendously overpriced for what they offer and I don't like their mentality of "We are incompatible with everything that matters because we are Apple, so fuck you". No, fuck you buddy. Especially not the smudgy piece of shit iPhone just so I can explore "gameplay innovation" with microtransactions up the ass. Experimentation used to be shareware in the 90's and early 00's, when and why did that get axed exactly? Oh, that's right... when every yuppie douchebag and their grandmother bought an iPhone.
 

CrystalShadow

don't upset the insane catgirl
Apr 11, 2009
3,829
0
0
Sixcess said:
I want to play a game called Rocket Cat.
Why does this bring to mind Doomsday arcade for me...

Oh, that's right, because the game one of the Micheal's had made was called LaserCat.

Hmm... Odd.

Anyway, I don't really know what to say about Iphones; I don't like apple, but the devices themselves are probably quite good.

Unfortunately, as gaming devices... I find them a little suspect.
Now, presumably multi-touch compensates for things a little bit, but Yahtzee has pointed out how traditional control schemes don't work very well on a touchscreen.

And, it's quite true. Much as I like the idea of touchscreen devices, experience has shown me that they're horrible for most game designs.

I have an admittedly cheap touchscreen phone, but it fails at 'virtual' buttons, and fails just as badly at anything that equates to a virtual mouse.

It doesn't help that it often starts to get the location of where you're touching the screen wrong when it has fingerprints on it.

Anyway, from a design perspective, I've learnt that there is only one gesture that feels relatively natural on a touch-screen, and that's sliding.

You can comfortably slide your finger across a screen and it usually works quite well, but as soon as you start dealing in buttons, or pretending there's a mouse, you get stupid problems.

Of course, this isn't helped in the case of a phone like mine with the interface designers thinking it's acceptable to have tiny buttons.

Basic logic should tell you that given how big people's fingers are, the minimum size for a button on a touchscreen is about 1 square centimetre.
Anything less, and the whole thing becomes very fiddly, and difficult to use without a stylus.

Anyway, I'm rather surprised on the whole that Yahtzee doesn't complain about the controls on Iphone games.
Especially considering the amount of whining he devotes to Wii controls, which, frankly, are much less likely to be stupidly annoying.
 

Varrdy

New member
Feb 25, 2010
875
0
0
As a relatively new iPhone owner (I've always been behind the technology curve!) I'm glad there are some decent games out there and may have to invest in some. So far I have one of the squillion "Puzzle Bobble" type games out there and that's about it. That said, Puzzle Bobble and Tetris are like crack - not quite sure what the appeal is but still very addictive!

I also have Carling's "iPint" but that's a game in the same way Rap is music - only just!

Wardy
 

Adzma

New member
Sep 20, 2009
1,287
0
0
Isn't it amusing how when Yahtzee writes an EP about iPhone games there's only about 20 or so responses at this point?

Doesn't matter anyway, iPhones, or in my case iPod touches, are a good way to waste time if you need to.
 

Citrus

New member
Apr 25, 2008
1,420
0
0
No Doodle Jump? For shame, Yahtzee.

Although you did sell me on iTunnel.
 

Anomynous 167

New member
May 6, 2008
404
0
0
Wow... this is the first time I have ever read something online that spelt "Wally", as in "Where's Wally?" correctly. And I am the only one to notice this?
 

Vzzdak

New member
May 7, 2010
129
0
0
Yahtzee Croshaw said:
After you've clocked up scores of a certain magnitude, such as 1000, 2500, 5000, etc, then in all future games you can actually start on that amount. It's a good idea for games with a rising difficulty curve like this, it saves having to claw tediously back up to that point through the easy, earlier sections, and I wish I saw it more often.
I believe Billy Mitchell would scoff at you.


Yahtzee Croshaw said:
Yahtzee refuses to correctly spell it, but these Iphone games are his favorite.
Somewhat obtuse to nitpick over the spelling of a brand name. Shall we rebrand your videos as "zERO pUNCTUATION" in order to likewise sound hip and non-conformist, daddio?

Regardless, good review of some iPhone games that are no doubt available for iPad as well.
 

Mysnomer

New member
Nov 11, 2009
333
0
0
Fronzel said:
27 comments after half a day? This one bores people, apparently.

Anomynous 167 said:
Wow... this is the first time I have ever read something online that spelt "Wally", as in "Where's Wally?" correctly. And I am the only one to notice this?
How could one misspell "Wally"?
I believe he's being snide about the fact that most people call it "Where's Waldo?" (A.K.A. the American version) and some people have this uptight elitism about it.
 

dbmountain

New member
Feb 24, 2010
344
0
0
He insists on spelling iPhone as "Iphone", but has no qualms about spelling iTunnel the way it is meant to be spelled. Talk about double standards
 

Sikachu

New member
Apr 20, 2010
464
0
0
Yahtzee Croshaw said:
They're the quickie magazine articles to triple-A gaming's full-length prose novels, the ten minutes of TV you watch to pass the time as the wife gets ready to go out to the movies. Women, eh, fellas?
Given this, what the fuck is a professional literature critic (to use your analogy) doing wasting everyone in his audience's time reviewing this garbage?

EDIT: So as to satisfy these new forum rules I've just had to agree to, I'm going to elaborate on my point so that no-one gets offended. I was deliberately exaggerating what I think is a legitimate question, that would be more politely phrased 'Given your low opinion of these games, what inspired you to review them? Did you not stop to consider that perhaps your audience (that of a literature critic, to use your analogy) might be uninterested in such shallow twaddle?' Given the target of my question, I felt that using an expletive would come under some sort of 'fair game' exception (being as he has demonstrated on countless occasions his own willingness to criticise in such terms). I do hope that someone can clarify the new rules here for me, I'd hate to pussyfoot around with these edits and explanations for no reason when vigorous discourse is allowed.

EDIT 2: Would it be going too far to ask how much editorial input goes into picking what you review week-in week-out? And if it fluctuates, how much did it creep in this week? Alternative questionwould be to ask if you just felt like a week of not playing games this week and found a way to bash out the video in half an hour's 'gaming time' + whatever it takes to make the vid? Please feel free not to answer either or both questions.
 

Anomynous 167

New member
May 6, 2008
404
0
0
Fronzel said:
27 comments after half a day? This one bores people, apparently.

Anomynous 167 said:
Wow... this is the first time I have ever read something online that spelt "Wally", as in "Where's Wally?" correctly. And I am the only one to notice this?
How could one misspell "Wally"?
Refer to Mrs.Nomer.
 

Electrogecko

New member
Apr 15, 2010
811
0
0
ewhac said:
Electrogecko said:
Please be done with the iPhone stuff Yahtzee. I don't own any Apple device but I understand that this had to be done and agree that it was a good idea, but I really hope you abandon this topic and get back to the mainstream.
And what, in your mind, constitutes mainstream?

Wikipedia asserts that Apple have sold over 73 million iPhones. (This figure apparently does not include iPod Touches.) Microsoft has sold 44.6 million Xbox 360s, and has taken almost twice as long to do it. Now, kindly consider that Android-based smartphones are starting to overtake iPhone.

You may need to re-evaluate your definition of, "Mainstream."
I'm going to assume you're playing devil's advocate....wow I don't think I've ever typed that expression. We're talking about mainstream gaming. You can't compare the sales of a home gaming console to that of an all in one smart phone that has an Apple logo on it. This is a mistake I constantly see being made in arguments that Apple poses a threat to the big 3. They're just 2 different markets. If you consider yourself a gamer, (which most everyone here does) you represent the "hardcore" market. You've bought yourself a dedicated gaming machine/ made a steam account because you wouldn't be content with only the Apple store.
 

copycatalyst

New member
Nov 10, 2009
216
0
0
For those who like grappling hooks and swinging games, I recommend Gravity Hook. It's a simple quest for altitude with the twist that your hook pulls you using gravity (as in, it gets stronger as you get closer to the object you're grappling.) This gets tricky considering you must grapple onto things that will kill you on contact, offering a nice risk/reward for swinging in close to get the best slingshot effect.
 

stuhacking

New member
Mar 7, 2010
41
0
0
Here's my desert island games. None of them are new, but I still play them a lot.

Defender Chronicles:
Mixes tower defence with RPG. Level up heroes to provide an advantage on the field. Unlock new defender types, items, stages. This game has a lot of replay value and the production is high quality.

The Quest:
A nice turn based RPG similar to Eye of the Beholder. The graphics are quite reminiscent of Daggerfall (Elder Scrolls 2). What more is there to say? Walk around, do quests, level up.

iNethack:
A cool port of Nethack [http://www.nethack.org/]. Tries to keep the controls fairly simple and does it pretty well. Free.

Alive 4 Ever:
The title is an absolutely terrible play on left 4 dead, but the game itself is really neat. It's a top down, dual stick shooter. Control one of four different characters shooting their way through zombie hordes. There's a set of storyline quests with some different objectives to add variety, a survival mode and a multiplayer mode. You can level up your characters with new abilities, attribute points and buying new equipment.
 

denimtrousers

New member
Dec 8, 2010
1
0
0
Like it or not, it's spelled 'iPhone'. That's its trademark. It's meant to be spelled that way. Just like it's 'McDonald's' not 'MacDonalds', or 'Xbox', not 'X-Box' or 'xBox' or 'XBOX' or any variation thereof. It's how companies distinguish their brand. Deal with it.
 

Snork Maiden

Snork snork
Nov 25, 2009
1,071
0
0
newwiseman said:
DeadlyYellow said:
I keep getting told I should make iPhone games (like the horde of other developers,) but it is rather difficult to build for an item you don't possess.

Still, seeing some of these titles is rather heartening.
It is remarkably easy, gamemaker can do it if you don't want to code, and if you know how to program the SDK and XCode tools dev kit are easy, with decent help files, but you need a Mac running 10.6, or a hackintosh running 10.6
I've never had a hackintosh run stable for more than a month or so - generally some small update got installed somehow and bricked everything. I don't really like using OSX, but I'd absolutely recommend picking up a Mac Mini at least if you want to program for iPhone. You don't need a current generation one to do iOS stuff anyway, and if you do want one then the developer discount you get at least starts to make them more affordable.
 

VectorZero

New member
Apr 15, 2010
29
0
0
Hmmm, iTunnel sounds like Tunnels of Armageddon for DOS, back in the day. IIRC, you could shoot turrets, and the tunnels had sliding doors and branching paths... good times.