The Customer Is Always Wrong

[Xhumed]

I'm sure many of us here have worked in retail/hospitality jobs and encountered customers complaining. What I want to know is: has anyone had a incredibly stupid customer/ complaint? How did you deal with it? Were you a customer with a stupid complaint?
For example:
When I worked in a pub in the UK, we constantly got customers asking for the Roast of the Day on weekdays. Basically, on the menu, under rolls, sandwiches and baguettes, there was the option for Roast of the Day, as a filling. It was very clearly marked under this section, yet people seemed reluctant to read the menu properly. Anyway, one day this woman in her 60s asked for the roast of the day to one of my staff. Being Latvian, and new to the country, this member of staff didn't quite understand. She asked me to check with the kitchen what the roast of the day was, and not having heard the order, I did so and reported back. The woman continues her order, but the poor girl taking it can't follow, so she asked me to take over. I ask the woman if she could repeat her order, and she tells me "I want the roast lamb." I asked politely if it was the sandwich, roll or bagguette she wanted. Her response was, in a condesending and impatient tone, "No, dear, the roast dinner." Politely again, I pointed out that we didn't offer the roast dinners on any day other than Sunday, and that roast of the day refered to fillings. Cue a snotty, "Oh well then I'll have to go back and find something else then!" She comes back and orders something off the Special Board. As it stated on there that it came with chips or potatoes and veg, that was my next question. "No Dear, potatoes and veg, like it says on the board." in the same patronising aggresive manner. Losing my patience somewhat, I replied in the tone I would use trying to explain something to a customer that was intoxicated- i.e. like you would an idiot or child. "It does say on the board potatoes and veg or chips. I was merely asking which you wanted."
"No, I don't want chips, Dear."
"Ok then..."
Took the rest of the order, she sits down. When the food is delivered shes all smiles, hopefully feeling slightly shamed about her a)Inability to read the menu properly (or perhaps inability to be bothered to read it properly) and b)her imperious manner.

 

[Bored Tomatoe]

hmmm...I always tend to be in line behind people like that....

 

[Lvl 64 Klutz]

At a hospital, in front of an elevator that had a sign that clearly read "TO DAVENPORT FLOORS 5-10":

"Excuse me, sir? How do I get to Davenport 8?"

 

[Maet]

I'm so comfortable with my job that I simply laugh and treat customers like the idiot they are if I encounter a stupid question.

 

[lukemdizzle]

I'm so comfortable with my job that I simply laugh and treat customers like the idiot they are if I encounter a stupid question.

what's your job?

 

[Maet]

what's your job?

Dairy Manager at a grocery store. I'm top of the ladder and union backed, baby!

 

[Moravich]

I've had many stupid encounters with people who would ask me where a certain item was in the grocery store I work in when the item in question was in row after row directly behind me..

I simple walk away from sheer exposure to idiocy.

Another would be the hundreds of people that have asked me if they can go out doors in the back that say ""EMPLOYEES ONLY" "AUTHORIZED PERSONNEL ONLY" everywhere, simply so they can get to their car a little faster.. again, I don't even dignify them with a response, and simple point at any one of the signs and proceed through said door.

 

[qbert4ever]

Oh God, don't get me started on stupid customers. Having worked at a major pharmacy for about a year, I had all kinds. People who couldn't figure out how to swipe their card. People who didn't where to find item x and had to ask me instead of looking at the giant signs hanging above all the isles. People who couldn't understand that a rebate is not the same thing as a coupon. Not to mention all the tards that held up the lines writing a check (who DOES that anymore?).

Hell, the only good thing about that job was the names me and the other cashiers came up with for our regulars. There was "Shakes", who had Parkinson's and was a stuck up... Well, you know. Then there was "Godzilla" who was as big as a house and liked to mouth-breath through pursed lips RIGHT IN MY FACE (the best part was that it was an Asian dude who gave her the name).

That, and the vacationing girls from Korea* that came in one time thought I was cute and took my picture with them. But aside from that, people just suck in general.

*I guess pharmacies are the new hot spots for vacationing Koreans.

 

[NewClassic_v1legacy]

I work in a gaming arcade, so yes, I encountered stupid customers and complaints every moment, of every day. I suppose I could cover some highlights, so I think I shall.

I work as an attendant. That's not manager, nor regional manager, just attendant. It's a simple, bottom-level job. So, as I make my attendance rounds, I'm approached by a woman, furious that a machine took her tokens, yet did not give her any games. This is a frequent problem, so I ask her which machine. She walks me to a machine that has an out of order sign hanging on the screen, the same machine, which is very clearly turned off. I tell her, as non-sarcastically as I can, "Ma'am, the machine took your money because the machine is turned off."
"Well," was her instant reply, "turn it on."
"I'm afraid I can't do that."
"And whyyy not?" Oh cute, she was looking down on me at this point.
"Because it's broken, ma'am."
"Why ain't you fixed it?" Oh, beautiful vocabulary, ma'am.
"I'm afraid to say the part we need hasn't come in yet, I'll be glad to refund your tokens, though. How much did you put in the machine?"
I figured 2, since it was two per play. Pretty obvious assumption, as I slid my hand into my comp-token pocket. "Ten."
"Ten?" I ask, making sure I heard that right.
"Mmmm-hm!" She replied, gesturing about the machine, "Ya'll gonna fix it soon?"
"Yes ma'am," I said, comping her the maximum allowed 8 tokens, "as soon as the part comes in. Let me know if you have any more questions."
"'Kay." She said, leaning over to put two more tokens into the clearly broken arcade. Safe to say, I had to put tape over the coin slots before she'd stopped. Dear God, was common sense all but lost?

Another incident, another one that is very dear to my heart. We've had one machine that was nothing but a headache. Broke constantly, never did as it was supposed to, but most definitely the most popular machine. I sure as hell couldn't figure it out, but I'm just a grunt, so I couldn't very well remove it. Well, I get a knock on the office door (required to be closed when counting and changing money, especially where the safe is concerned), and I open it to find a very irate looking woman, and her small child crying into her leg. "One 'a ya'll's machines is broken."
"Okay, which one?" Please don't be the one I'm thinking...
She walked me to the monolithic yellow doom-arcade. "This one."
"Okay, what did it do?"
"Well, I pressed the prize button, and it ain't drop the prize." Figures...
"Okay, lemme try something." I tested the coin drop, and the prize sleeve, they both worked, but the prize was stuck, and wouldn't drop.
"Ma'am, it doesn't seem to be working right, please try another prize from the same bracket."
"Can ya'll make this one work?"
I didn't have the keys to open that part of the cabinet, much less the tools or the technical knowledge to fix that kinda faulty design. "No ma'am, but there is a similar (only different color) prize on this arm over here."
"She," motioning to her daughter, "ain't want that one."
"I'm afraid there's nothing I can do for that, ma'am."
"Ya'll can't? What's yer name, kid?"
Oh ho, I can see where this is headed. Screw the fact that my name was pretty clearly written on my employee lanyard. "Taylor, ma'am."
"Well, Taylor, lemme talk to ya'll's manager."
Fun... "The manager isn't in, ma'am."
"Can ya'll call him?"
At home? Not just no, but hell "No ma'am. Although he will be in tomorrow morning, until then, I can refund some of the tokens you put in this machine. How many did you use?"
"Eight dollas." Dear God, the prize was a miniature slinky... And very clearly over my maximum allotted.
"I'm afraid I can't refund that much ma'am." She's already asked for your manager, think fast, skippy. "How about I refund as much as I'm allowed to, which is 8 tokens, and give you a 50 ticket or less prize from the counter (Which had larger slinkies, oddly enough)?"
"Okay." She said, got her daughter a big, colorful slinky, and left the store, all smiles.
A complaint was ready for me when I got to work the next afternoon. The hell is wrong with people?

I could go on and on, with nothing but similar instances of human stupidity. But, that's for later, when I'm feeling less tired.

 

[mshcherbatskaya]

In my particular case, when my customers complain about something, they are usually right, and my frustration is not at their unreasonable expectations (they aren't), but at my inability to reach back through the byzantine corporate structure and fix the situation.

 

[PurpleRain]

*Sigh*

Anyone in Australia know about those new Woolworths petrol cards? You scan them before or during the transaction and you get a tiny bit off petrol and a chance to win in some draw? Yeah sounds all fancy. But obviously, for it to work on your transaction, you have to put it in when it's going through. Right? Easy enough? Wrong.
I was serving some elderly lady. All hapy with fake smiles from me. So far, it was all good. She was pleasent and I was talking to her about dogs I think, since she was on that topic.
Anyway, she gives me the money and I give her, her change and receit.
"Oh," she says, "I have this card, any wasy I can still put it through?"
"Sorry, I should have checked," I said appologising, "it can only go through with the purchase."
At that moment, her face went from smiles... to a look of evil! I kid you not, you should have seen the rapid change in this old ladies face when I told her I couldn't do it.
"Well! I want this purchase put onto this card somehow! I'm not going to leave until it is done!" quote unquote. Exact words, 'I'm not going to leave...' seriously, you missed your mark. No big deal.
"Ah, sorry, there's nothing I can do."
"To bad. (Boy she had some lip) Get me your manager!"
Brought the mans=ager over, and all that occured was exactly what I said, and she held up the line for a bit. Congrates!

At the moment, I'm sort of semi-floor manager at my store so I have to deal with the bulk of the crap. Some stories include a guy that swore at a checkout girl for no reason, no reason at all. I was standing right next to when it happened so I saw the whole thing. She accedently put the apples through wrong and he went off at her. Full screaming and shouting. I told him to leave. The girl was ok because I was laughing the entire time I told him to go. I thought it was funny how somepeople react.

Another time I had to serve some racist man that didn't like the Indian man I served previously. I stopped serving him and voided his transaction. No food for you!

I could go on with these.

 

[Eyclonus]

I deliver to a lot of white trash, hence the expression at my work is "The customer is always right, as right as an indecisive, retarded fuck can be..."

We get a lot of idiots coming up and trying to get free pizza because the drivers are 10 minutes late on a friday night and we'd told them an hour wait. You'd think that being told you would have an hour before it arrived would give them some idea how busy we are, especially when these people order on other nights and wait only 30 minutes at the most.

One of my "favourites" changed the order when I knocked on their door, they assumed that the pizza in the box would transmute from a Hawaiian to a Margherita at will...

 

[dalek sec]

Thankfully I'm just glad I work at data entry in a children's hospital or else I'm sure I would have been canned for chewing out the people who you guys deal with everyday.

 

[NewClassic_v1legacy]

Thankfully I'm just glad I work at data entry in a children's hospital or else I'm sure I would have been canned for chewing out the people who you guys deal with everyday.

Dealt with, for me. Past tense, don't work there anymore.

Although, I'd've been fired instantly for half of the stuff I said beyond the customer's range of understanding. I think I went out of my way to insult every customer I could in a such a way that they wouldn't even realize I was making cracks at their expense. Does that make me a bad person? Yep.

Catharsis? You know it.

 

[the monopoly guy]

I could go on with these.

Please, do. All of you, this is bloody hilarious!

 

[NewClassic_v1legacy]

I could go on with these.

Please, do. All of you, this is bloody hilarious!

Tomorrow. Promise. Although I'm going to bed now, g'night folks.

 

[Radelaide]

*Sigh*

Anyone in Australia know about those new Woolworths petrol cards? You scan them before or during the transaction and you get a tiny bit off petrol and a chance to win in some draw? Yeah sounds all fancy. But obviously, for it to work on your transaction, you have to put it in when it's going through. Right? Easy enough? Wrong.
I was serving some elderly lady. All hapy with fake smiles from me. So far, it was all good. She was pleasent and I was talking to her about dogs I think, since she was on that topic.
Anyway, she gives me the money and I give her, her change and receit.
"Oh," she says, "I have this card, any wasy I can still put it through?"
"Sorry, I should have checked," I said appologising, "it can only go through with the purchase."
At that moment, her face went from smiles... to a look of evil! I kid you not, you should have seen the rapid change in this old ladies face when I told her I couldn't do it.
"Well! I want this purchase put onto this card somehow! I'm not going to leave until it is done!" quote unquote. Exact words, 'I'm not going to leave...' seriously, you missed your mark. No big deal.
"Ah, sorry, there's nothing I can do."
"To bad. (Boy she had some lip) Get me your manager!"
Brought the mans=ager over, and all that occured was exactly what I said, and she held up the line for a bit. Congrates!

At the moment, I'm sort of semi-floor manager at my store so I have to deal with the bulk of the crap. Some stories include a guy that swore at a checkout girl for no reason, no reason at all. I was standing right next to when it happened so I saw the whole thing. She accedently put the apples through wrong and he went off at her. Full screaming and shouting. I told him to leave. The girl was ok because I was laughing the entire time I told him to go. I thought it was funny how somepeople react.

Another time I had to serve some racist man that didn't like the Indian man I served previously. I stopped serving him and voided his transaction. No food for you!

I could go on with these.

"Do you have your Everyday rewards card?"

Ahyeah, Woolworths ***** too, Purple. I was working yesterday and this guy had a massive go at the girl next to me over the price of beer! I was like "You can tell he's an alcoholic"

I once got abused by a guy (who happened to be an aboriginal) over a bag check. The way it works is we have to check bags that are bigger than an A4 size of paper. And I said "Sorry about this sir, but could I check your bag. It's company policy, sorry." With this polite smile on my face then he went on a huge rant about how I was being racist!

I hate customers...

We should totally talk about stupid customers, Purple. We could start a support group!

 

[howard_hughes]

hmmm, I used to work at one of those big home supply warehouse stores (outside mind you) and an elderly couple approached me one day asking to know where the J-trim was.(trim for vinyl siding for house exteriors) I pointed it out to them and went back to what I was doing, not two minutes later they come back over and accuse me of stupidity because what I sent them to wasn't what they were after and hence wasn't J-trim. I proceeded to walk them over to the area I'd previously sent them to and examine what it was they were looking at. To my credit it was J-trim (sometimes things get misplaced by other customers) and I proceed to ask them what color they had on their house. "No, that's not J-trim, you don't know what you're doing we want to speak to someone else." I end up having to go to a colleague of mine to ask in order to satisfy them. Turns out what they wanted was CAULKING for their bathroom, something that is stocked inside, they start walking back to the store complaining about how they're never coming there again and how 'kids these days know nothing' of course being my usual dignified and respectful self I mentioned louder then I should have that King Tut's mother shouldn't be allowed out in public if she's not going to take her meds... or something like that.

 

[zen5887]

I work in a caravan park that issues the permits you need to drive on the beach here. I've been working there for a year and my parents have been working there for 12 so I kinda know whats going on. It is soo frustraiting when people try to tell you your wrong. On saterday this guy about 25ish came in

"Hey I wanna permit"
"Righto.. $35.50 for a week or $110.80 for a year"
"Hur hur I just wanna go up for the day"
"Then it'll cost you $35.50.."
"Bullshit! Whatever just tell me where the free track is"
"Uhh there is no free track"
"Naaahh me mate told me there was one"
"Sorry.. Theres no free track on the island"
"Hur hur im pretty sure there is" and he leaves

5 minutes later after talking to the other two in the car he comes back in and buys a permit

I laughed soo hard

 

[werepossum]

So glad to be out of retail! The only retail job I ever worked was at an auto parts store (family business.) It's amazing how many people have no idea of the make of their own automobile. I once sold a tail pipe for a '62 Bel Air. The guy said it didn't look right, so I double-checked the year and model and then looked it up again. An hour later he brings it back saying it's wrong. "This looks like a tail pipe for a Chevrolet."

"Yes, sir. A Bel Air is a Chevy."

"Well, mine ain't. Mine's a Chrysler."

"Umm - could it be a Belvedere?"

"It might be."

"So it's a Plymouth Belvedere."

"No, it's a Chrysler Bel Air." So I fetch him a tail pipe for a '62 Plymouth Belvedere, tell him it's for a '62 Chrysler Bel Air, apologize for the problem, and he goes away happy.

I've also dealt with Mustangs that were manufactured on March 1st (says so right on the fender) and Caution brand mowers. And this is a form of retail with relatively savvy customers!

Retail sucks. Stay in school.