The Escapist Army

[ionpulse2]

Rank: Field Commander, Third Class

Preferred Weapon(s): .49 Magnum and the AUG for myself, and for my main "weapon", I send in my MASSIVE fleet of Kirov Airships (see my avatar for examples).

Battalion: Freeman Squad

Major Battles: Held the line at the battle of Valve vs Zenga, and during the battle of Valve vs Bioware, where I helped raise the flag with Gordon Freeman, signaling the enemy defeat.

 

[Souplex]

Why would the Escapist need an army? They have me.

We need the army to fight you when you come into power

What do you mean when peasant?

 

[DominoSmith]

Rank: Private
Weapon: Machete, Bozar
Battalion: Berserkers
Major Battles: None...yet[sub]unless you count when I was telling a guy on what I did to jerks at my school[/sub]

 

[SturmDolch]

Rank: Dictator For Life
Weapon: Tactical Nuclear Strikes and Ninjas
Battalion: The Grand Army of Earth
Major Battles: The Grand Takeover of Earth by Sturmdolch the Splendid

 

[Javarino]

Rank: Guy with a nice hat
Weapon: flamethrower trousers
Battalion:did I mention my nice hat?
Major Battles: Was on the opposing side of every developer who went up the march mayhem ladder
(why the hell do my choices not matter?)

 

[Trombone_Hero]

Rank: Private
Preferred Weapon: Common sense... and grenades, COMBINED!
Battalion: hard to decide. But I ultimately went with the Loading Leaders over the Zeros Heroes.

 

[enzilewulf]

Well, I'll give it a try...

Rank: I'm new to the site, so probably the lowest of the low...
Preferred Weapons: whatever can take out the most enemies in one shot.
Battalion: Hmmm... Yahtzee regiment?
Major battles: A few troll battles elsewhere and the Battle between which Prince of Persia game was the best, also elsewhere. I also started an ancient war between Scotland and a renegade border clan.

You sound like a freelance to me. lol

 

[Lancer723]

Private- > 4 months
Corporal- 4-8 months
Sergeant- 8-12 months
Lieutenant- 12-16 months
Captain- 16-20 months
Major- 20-24 months
Brigadier General- 24-28 months
General- 28-32 months
Major general- 32-36 months
Admiral- Anything more than 3 years

That...doesn't make sense.

Yes I realize I'm taking some liberties with the various ranks of the different branches of the military, but the ranks are technically in the right order, and I'm taking some liberties by leaving out ranks such as Sergeant First Class, Petty Officer, and Ensign. I was trying to make it more intuitive not completely correct.

If your referring to the months system, it's understandable enough, if your on the cusp (i.e. in the middle of a cutoff month) feel free to bump yourself into the higher of the two ranks, this is supposed to be fun so who cares.

Thanks for being constructive.

 

[Kiriona]

Well, I'll give it a try...

Rank: I'm new to the site, so probably the lowest of the low...
Preferred Weapons: whatever can take out the most enemies in one shot.
Battalion: Hmmm... Yahtzee regiment?
Major battles: A few troll battles elsewhere and the Battle between which Prince of Persia game was the best, also elsewhere. I also started an ancient war between Scotland and a renegade border clan.

You sound like a freelance to me. lol

You might be right. lol I don't do well with authority figures, anyway.

 

[Sleekgiant]

Why would the Escapist need an army? They have me.

We need the army to fight you when you come into power

What do you mean when peasant?

*sigh* Shoosh you, I have no time for your nonsense

 

[enzilewulf]

Well, I'll give it a try...

Rank: I'm new to the site, so probably the lowest of the low...
Preferred Weapons: whatever can take out the most enemies in one shot.
Battalion: Hmmm... Yahtzee regiment?
Major battles: A few troll battles elsewhere and the Battle between which Prince of Persia game was the best, also elsewhere. I also started an ancient war between Scotland and a renegade border clan.

You sound like a freelance to me. lol

You might be right. lol I don't do well with authority figures, anyway.

lol..neither do it

 

[thepopeofatheism]

Private- > 4 months
Corporal- 4-8 months
Sergeant- 8-12 months
Lieutenant- 12-16 months
Captain- 16-20 months
Major- 20-24 months
Brigadier General- 24-28 months
General- 28-32 months
Major general- 32-36 months
Admiral- Anything more than 3 years

That...doesn't make sense.

Yes I realize I'm taking some liberties with the various ranks of the different branches of the military, but the ranks are technically in the right order, and I'm taking some liberties by leaving out ranks such as Sergeant First Class, Petty Officer, and Ensign. I was trying to make it more intuitive not completely correct.

If your referring to the months system, it's understandable enough, if your on the cusp (i.e. in the middle of a cutoff month) feel free to bump yourself into the higher of the two ranks, this is supposed to be fun so who cares.

Thanks for being constructive.

Well...there's other issues.

For instance General is two ranks higher than Major General and Admirals are equal to Generals. It's just the Navy version.

Not to mention the fact that you're mixing enlisted and commissioned ranks.

 

[Xylis]

I would desert regularly and only show up for the paydays.

 

[geddydisciple]

Rank: Major
Primary Weapon: AK-47 Secondary Weapon: Crowbar
Battalion: 42nd Weekly Issue
Major Battles: 2 March Mayhems, The Fable 2 flame wars, Modern Warfare 2 flamewars, and several troll skirmishes.

 

[Kaymish]

rank: FLT SGT / Lt. (if you want use that system)
Preferred weapon: Lighting staff
Battalion: High Command (basically anything and everything)
Major battles:███████████████,███████████,███████████████ (i cant remember)

 

[dalek sec]

Rank: General

Preferred Weapons: Las pistol, chainsword and bolt pistol

Battalion: Skaro 141 regiment

Major battles: Leader of raiding team in Nazi Zombie lab in 1943, fought in the Robot wars from 1964 to 1973, helped defeat Zenga and aided Valve during the final battle.

 

[Fappy]

I wouldn't last long in the military so I'd dodge out to Canada. Then when the US decided to annex them I'd head over the Australia.... then probably seek refuge on the moon.

 

[Azraellod]

Rank: Lieutenant

Preferred Weapon: None. Will swap between weapons pretty quickly, rarely using one consistently.

Battalion: Forum Gamers (Retired)

Battles: Despite the time he's spent here, he has never actually been in a major battle. Aside from a few minor ones, he preferred to stay well away from them, including nearly all of March Mayhem.

 

[Tharwen]

Rank: Awesome
Preferred weapon: Whatever Hastati use
Battalion: Polybius Guard
Major battles: Was present at the Valve/Zynga massacre. Engaged another forum warrior in friendly fire over the subject of paedophilia about 2 months ago.

 

[Lancer723]

Private- > 4 months
Corporal- 4-8 months
Sergeant- 8-12 months
Lieutenant- 12-16 months
Captain- 16-20 months
Major- 20-24 months
Brigadier General- 24-28 months
General- 28-32 months
Major general- 32-36 months
Admiral- Anything more than 3 years

That...doesn't make sense.

Yes I realize I'm taking some liberties with the various ranks of the different branches of the military, but the ranks are technically in the right order, and I'm taking some liberties by leaving out ranks such as Sergeant First Class, Petty Officer, and Ensign. I was trying to make it more intuitive not completely correct.

If your referring to the months system, it's understandable enough, if your on the cusp (i.e. in the middle of a cutoff month) feel free to bump yourself into the higher of the two ranks, this is supposed to be fun so who cares.

Thanks for being constructive.

Well...there's other issues.

For instance General is two ranks higher than Major General and Admirals are equal to Generals. It's just the Navy version.

Not to mention the fact that you're mixing enlisted and commissioned ranks.

Yes, Major General is a higher rank, you have me there, and yes General and Admiral are equal ranks, but Admiral sounds better. Like I said I wasn't trying to be completely correct, if I did I would have just copied the U.S. Army's or the Navy's.

I don't know what you mean about mixing enlisted and non-enlisted, other then there's no specific major jump between Sergeant and Lieutenant? Sergeant is an NCO rank in the marines and army (US) and doesn't exist in the Navy.

It's just for fun anyway, no need to bring technical military knowledge into it.