I cannot state the depths of my nerd rage at hearing this.
The one thing the the Sands of Time trilogy desperately needed to dump, more than ANYTHING, was its story. It was ridiculous, nonsensical, and frequently impossibly grating. The first one certainly had it right with there not being much of a plot except "Here is a dick. In order to kill him, you must perform an unbelievably long string of superhuman stunts and solve some puzzles along the way."
The second one flirted with adding some horror elements (monsters that are actually scary), but ultimately was difficult to take seriously, thanks to the ridiculously oversexualized women present in the game. Still, at least it tried to do something other than have a porn-movie-thin plot.
Then the great teabagging of the third game arrived, dissociating any of the morally questionable things the Prince did by blaming the Sands themselves, rather than forcing him to take responsibility for himself (a point the game is curiously quick to point out, though for the reason of trying to flip it around). The Prince finally makes it home to discover that his home has been taken over by a Final Fantasy game, complete with preposterous multistage final boss shaped like a glowing yellow butterfly deeply interested in tentacle sex with Farah, quite possibly the most poorly written female character in the history of video games.
The end of the game, the ultimate solution to this 'The sands are too dangerous to permit in the mortal realm' business, is for the Empress to just depart? What, she could do that? Why didn't she do that at the end, or, God help us, the beginning of Warrior Within, if hanging around would cause so much sturm und drang?
I loved the SOT trilogy as games, but I wish the story, the horribly plot-hole riddled story, would fall into a spiky pit and not rewind itself out.
And to hear this, this horrible, mind-breakingly awful news, right on the heels of the new POP game NOT HAVING AN ENDING WITH ANY CLOSURE, moves me to symphonies of violence. Aching, nine-part symphonies of violence.
The one thing the the Sands of Time trilogy desperately needed to dump, more than ANYTHING, was its story. It was ridiculous, nonsensical, and frequently impossibly grating. The first one certainly had it right with there not being much of a plot except "Here is a dick. In order to kill him, you must perform an unbelievably long string of superhuman stunts and solve some puzzles along the way."
The second one flirted with adding some horror elements (monsters that are actually scary), but ultimately was difficult to take seriously, thanks to the ridiculously oversexualized women present in the game. Still, at least it tried to do something other than have a porn-movie-thin plot.
Then the great teabagging of the third game arrived, dissociating any of the morally questionable things the Prince did by blaming the Sands themselves, rather than forcing him to take responsibility for himself (a point the game is curiously quick to point out, though for the reason of trying to flip it around). The Prince finally makes it home to discover that his home has been taken over by a Final Fantasy game, complete with preposterous multistage final boss shaped like a glowing yellow butterfly deeply interested in tentacle sex with Farah, quite possibly the most poorly written female character in the history of video games.
The end of the game, the ultimate solution to this 'The sands are too dangerous to permit in the mortal realm' business, is for the Empress to just depart? What, she could do that? Why didn't she do that at the end, or, God help us, the beginning of Warrior Within, if hanging around would cause so much sturm und drang?
I loved the SOT trilogy as games, but I wish the story, the horribly plot-hole riddled story, would fall into a spiky pit and not rewind itself out.
And to hear this, this horrible, mind-breakingly awful news, right on the heels of the new POP game NOT HAVING AN ENDING WITH ANY CLOSURE, moves me to symphonies of violence. Aching, nine-part symphonies of violence.
