The Worst Day Ever!

[eatenbyagrue]

Meet Mr. Fortuna. He is a normal, everyday office worker. What he DOESN'T know is that he is about to have the WORST DAY EVER.

So here's the thing: we, the people of the Escapist, have to inflict a series of misfortunes, increasing in magnitude until it stops being funny.

So yeah. Everyone inflicts one (1) misfortune on our poor friend, and the next person after him has to top the "misfortune" dealt by the person.

We do however, have rules:
1) No killing. It wouldn't be so fun if the main character dies, now would it?
2) Nothing that would require a several month-long hospital stay to recover from. The whole point is that the day has to be really, really bad, but not bad enough to land him in the ER.
3) Nothing gross. Rule of thumb is that if it'll get the thread locked or have the moderators slap a probation on you, then don't do it.


I'll start:

As he awoke that morning, Mr. Fortuna reaches over to shut off his alarm clock. He yawns, gets out of bed, and the floor collapses from under him, dumping him unceremoniously into the apartment below his.

 

[revolverwolf]

And the apartment's owner orders Mr. Fortuna to pay for the ceiling. It's not like he can refuse, so they come to an agreement that he will pay for the ceiling to be fixed. Then he heads to work.

 

[Dread Pirate Pete]

On the way to work he is set upon by a gang who steal his trousers, but not his wallet. He is now confused and a bit chilly.

 

[Jedamethis]

He finds an abandoned cat who claws at his arms and rips his shirt. Then he puts on his jumper to cover it up and continues on to work.

 

[EscapeGoat_v1legacy]

As he reaches work, he gets caught in the new revolving doors, which dump him unceremoniously back out onto the street.

 

[Cargando]

On the street, he gets mugged a second time. This time they take his wig.

 

[Insanum]

After then, Battered & bruised, makes it into work, He finds out he has been fired 2 days previous, But no-one thought to tell him.

 

[revolverwolf]

He sits down at his desk, to pack away his belongings, and his chair breaks beneath him.

 

[Cargando]

He gets up, picks up his stuff, and the bottom drops out of the box. All the stuff smashes to pieces on the ground in a cruel parody of his dreams.

 

[jackanderson]

He walks to the elevator and heads for the ground floor. But the cable snaps and it plummets to the bottom. He survives, but the elevator is covered in the blood of the people he was with. He is soaked in blood.

 

[Neonbob]

He sighs and just walks out of the building. As he leaves, an anthill swarms, and a cloud of mosquitoes descend upon the man. He flails his arms in wide circles, and tries to bat them away. This doesn't work, and he only makes the bugs madder. In a very short time, he is covered in the bugs.

 

[Insanum]

The fire brigade happens to be passing & douse him with the fire house. No more bugs, But now soaking wet.

 

[Ristoril]

he slips on his own moisture in to wet cement

 

[Cargando]

He lands arse-first into it, he stands up and sighs as it sets. He takes one step and falls into an open sewage pipe the work-men were repairing.

 

[Insanum]

After climbing back up to street level he tries to dust himself off, Mr Fortuna see's his crush over the road watching his misfortune. Trying to act cool he tripped over the "Men Working" sign & fell face first into the wet cement.

 

[Code Monkey]

He scrambles to get up, furiously embarassed. He reaches out, and finds a hand. As he gets up he see's that it's the very woman that caused him to fall in helping him. She smiles . "Looks like you had a bit of a tumble" she says. He Smiles back. Maybe his luck was about to change. Just as he's about to respond, he see's a man walking towards them. "Oh, I'm sorry Mr.Fortuna,"She says. "this is Edward, My husband."

 

[Insanum]

The husband walks over & asks what all the commotion is. When the husband Hears about his wife helping a man he becomes blinded with rage, Punches Mr Fortuna in the face, causing him to spin on the spot & fall back into the open sewer.

 

[AvsJoe]

Mr. Fortuna figures he's had enough of this and begins to run off. He loses a shoe in his haste, but he doesn't notice...

Until he steps on a broken beer bottle that cuts through his sock and foot.

 

[jackanderson]

He simply sighs. As he walks forwards, he falls into ANOTHER open sewer being operated on by ANOTHER crew. But this one has alligators.

 

[Insanum]

After being pulled out by the crew he is wisked away in an ambulance & has a two hour nap, Waking up in a ward, Just about to be discharged from hospital.

Whilst Filling in the forms to be discharged, Mr Fortuna recieved a papercut.