Unskippable: Front Mission Evolved

[LadyRhian]

Wanzer comes from contracting "wanderpanzer" -> wanderpanzers -> wanzers.

Walking tank would be a problem. walking tank -> walking tank - > wank.

And I guess that would have made the pilots wankers then XD

Wanzer...Twozer...Threezer...Fourzer

Dylan would then be wanking off in his wank.

And better hope none of those space elevator cables get cut or sabotaged. I do not even want to think what devastation one of those things falling out of the sky would be... Humans squishy!

 

[BX3]

Wanzer comes from contracting "wanderpanzer" -> wanderpanzers -> wanzers.

Walking tank would be a problem. walking tank -> walking tank - > wank.

And I guess that would have made the pilots wankers then XD

Wanzer...Twozer...Threezer...Fourzer

Snoop Doggy Dogg and Dr. Dre are at the Doorzers.


OT: I wish I had a humor chip installed in my electronics. It would make everyday life a little less boring. Also, "Escape!" had me LOLing hard.

 

[Mad Hamish]

Still not much of an excuse, you don't have to have it's name reference the panzer. Or you could try something like Bi-Panzer...? as in bipedal panzer. Yeah it's a bit akward but at least it doesn't sound ridiculous.

You could also try the star wars rout of AT-P All Terrain Panzer (AT-AT = All terrain Armored Transport for thous starwars fans who aren't complete nerds )

But then people would get confused and think the game was about adenosine triphosphate.

 

[JonnWood]

Tell me "wanzer" is German or something. Please.

"The Nsrl."

Hey, I think use that shampoo!

 

[Ezechiehl]

I really miss the old callback jokes you guys used to do. "X time I died", Vincent and the moon, etc. I loved those. Maybe it's just me.

 

[Ben Simon]

What's with these mechanics? They're so generic, yet stupid.

 

[Canadamus Prime]

Oh boy, more hard headed lab technician, ditsy valley girl, the HAL9000 wannabe and the really silly names for things. Can't wait.

 

[timeadept]

Still not much of an excuse, you don't have to have it's name reference the panzer. Or you could try something like Bi-Panzer...? as in bipedal panzer. Yeah it's a bit akward but at least it doesn't sound ridiculous.

You could also try the star wars rout of AT-P All Terrain Panzer (AT-AT = All terrain Armored Transport for thous starwars fans who aren't complete nerds )

But then people would get confused and think the game was about adenosine triphosphate.

Ah damn, you're right. Well i'm outa ideas now.

 

[LordVyreth]

Can anyone figure out who the valley girl's voice actress was? It sounds so familiar, and it will drive me nuts if I can't figure it out. It sounds a little like Victoria Jackson, but I really hope it's not that.

 

[Mezzo.]

"It is I, the Wanzerful Wizard of Woz. I have a speech winpediment."

Freakin'. Gold.

 

[captaincabbage]

I was frankly shocked and appaled that Graham and Paul didn't make fun og that 'Dylan' fellow, since he's the most bro-ski bro who ever bro'd past the brochure.

 

[shirin238]

Wanzers xD That hard to come up with a cool mech name that is not Gundam ehh?

 

[Hazard12]

I have to say that was a terrible cutscene, even by the almost impossibly low bar already set by those featured on Unskippable. Great job Double Helix!

I was frankly shocked and appaled that Graham and Paul didn't make fun og that 'Dylan' fellow, since he's the most bro-ski bro who ever bro'd past the brochure.

I hadn't noticed this. I then rewatched the video. My life ambition is now to find the closest approximation to Dylan in real life just to punch him in the side of the head.

 

[XMark]

A space escalator...

How would that work? Especially at a 45 Degree Angle. you'd have to have support for it (since we obviously dont have hover technology in this game) and jet propulsion would be to costly and pointless. How much of the world would you be covering as you go in your straight line?

And to make matters even worse, you just know that some asshole is gonna stand there in front of you instead of walking up so it'll take like three times as long to get to space.

 

[SelectivelyEvil13]

"Dillooooooooooooon! Like O-M-G W-T-F R U Doing w/ tha Wanzer?! Sasha is going to be sooooooooo P/O'd when she finds out you went to the Wanzer ball without her, ohhhhhhhhhhhhh!"

...

"BTW, if you're by the warzone later can you pick me up a smoothie? OH!!! Make that a Frozen Frapp! Half soy, half skim, three shots of espresso, the Wanzer schematics, whipped cream - make that half a shot of whipped cream - a dusting of cocoa... and with caramel! Hhhhhhhh!!!! Yum!!!!"

...

"And a pretzel. I want a pretzel, Dillon, because you so had to gank that Wanzer anyway, gosh!"

 

[emeraldrafael]

A space escalator...

How would that work? Especially at a 45 Degree Angle. you'd have to have support for it (since we obviously dont have hover technology in this game) and jet propulsion would be to costly and pointless. How much of the world would you be covering as you go in your straight line?

And to make matters even worse, you just know that some asshole is gonna stand there in front of you instead of walking up so it'll take like three times as long to get to space.

Isnt that the point of an escalator though?

 

[Canadamus Prime]

I have to say that was a terrible cutscene, even by the almost impossibly low bar already set by those featured on Unskippable. Great job Double Helix!

No, I'd say that Zoids one was way worse than this.

"Dillooooooooooooon! Like O-M-G W-T-F R U Doing w/ tha Wanzer?! Sasha is going to be sooooooooo P/O'd when she finds out you went to the Wanzer ball without her, ohhhhhhhhhhhhh!"

...

"BTW, if you're by the warzone later can you pick me up a smoothie? OH!!! Make that a Frozen Frapp! Half soy, half skim, three shots of espresso, the Wanzer schematics, whipped cream - make that half a shot of whipped cream - a dusting of cocoa... and with caramel! Hhhhhhhh!!!! Yum!!!!"

...

"And a pretzel. I want a pretzel, Dillon, because you so had to gank that Wanzer anyway, gosh!"

Ugh, I can't stand girls that talk like that!

 

[sarttan]

Wanzer is a goofy name but it's better than the alternative.
It's an abbreviation for "walking panzers". Imagine if they'd gone with just "walking tanks".

Gentlemen! We give you the "Walts"

 

[hypermage]

Classic take on a classic JRPG cutscene. Been a while since I played a Front Mission so its heartening to see the cutscenes haven't improved.

A simple solution to that space escalator space problem: spirals.

Gentlemen! We give you the "Walts"

Damn, had a Dr. Weird quote on the tip of my tongue there.

 

[Agent Monocle]

As a fan of Front Mission, I got this game as soon as it came out fully knowing that I was diving into a vast sea of feces and peanut butter. After six long hours of muttering to myself that it was just like Armored Core and receiving weird and worried looks from my sister, I finished the game, went to Cold Stone and demanded enough ice cream to give me diabetes.

This video unearthed those sad, bitter memories even then I was laughing with enjoyment then slowly gradually turned into head-between-knees sobbing. Why!? Why, Square!? Release this junk into the US, but not Front Mission 5!?

...Anyways, I think the term, Wanzer, is no more odd of a name than Gundam and other numerous terms Japanese use for walking armored vechicles. It was the same for me, when I first started Front Mission games. It's something to get used to though I think the best term so far I've seen would be "mech."