Vader Wants You to Know: Obi-Wan is Dead

Racecarlock

New member
Jul 10, 2010
2,497
0
0
This will be a day long remembered, it has seen the end of kenobi, and will soon see the end of the rebellion.
 

Racecarlock

New member
Jul 10, 2010
2,497
0
0
This will be a day long remembered. It has seen the end of kenobi, and will soon see end of the rebellion.
 

O maestre

New member
Nov 19, 2008
882
0
0
hmmm this does concern me... there are actually quite a lot of parallels between bin laden and ben kenobi, except that kenobi actually hid in a cave....

GASP! what if bin laden had his own luke skywalker jedi, i mean jihad apprentice!?!?..... gasp that means obama's illegitimate extremist son is somewhere on the loose somewhere!!!
 

Frankster

Space Ace
Mar 13, 2009
2,507
0
0
Finally we can rest easy from the attacks of the vile jedi.

I'm hosting a massive party over obi wan's death finally coming true, now we have finally achieved vengeance for the Naboo and Polis Massa attacks, truly this is a great day for peace and empire citizens everywhere.

Edit: Comment page of article is really pure gold, actually no joke we can make can compare to those, heres more or less mine but much MUCH better:

Although I am relieved that he can no longer directly plan or be involved in the planning of any new attacks, I can't help but feel somewhat robbed that justice was not actually achieved. When we began our hunt for Obi-Wan Kenobi, we were promised that he would be brought to justice and the evidence against him would be revealed. We voted in the Emperor and let regional governors have control of their systems, with the hope that this would shore up our security and root out the rebels.

This hunt has transformed into Obi-Wan being wanted, dead or alive, and I feel that our Galactic Empire and our high code of justice is not being upheld. Additionally, the remote systems are barely part of the Empire and have become somewhat lawless. We are constantly sending our Troopers into harms way and it is unclear who, through certainly clear that, someone will simply step into Obi-Wan's place and continue the onslaught of attacks and propaganda against us.

When we started we were in the right, by all measures, hunting down those who attacked the Republic and forced us to reorganize our government to prevent a similar attack. Now we are simply engaged in a never ending battle against the rebels who continue to grow in numbers. I'm not concerned that killing Obi-Wan will increase the likelihood of a retaliatory attack, as they would be attacking us anyway if they got the chance, but I think that we deserved to see real justice. We deserved to see a trial, the evidence, and heal a little from the pain caused by this man.
 

Emurlahn

New member
Jan 13, 2010
1,017
0
0
Freaking genius!

Worst thing is, it fits so damned well, lets just hope that this doesn't mean that the terrorists will "win" eventually...

I hope they keep expanding this site, and put some other really good articles into it, would be really awesome.
 

duchaked

New member
Dec 25, 2008
4,451
0
0
love the comments hahaha

"Until body I see, belive it I will not."

and the rest are just like Yahoo article comments. some guy screaming, and the inevitable spam ad
 

Redlin5_v1legacy

Better Red than Dead
Aug 5, 2009
48,836
0
0
Smeagol150 said:
Sure, Vader will claim all the credit, but we all know that the last Sith Lord did all the work. Vader will just use this in his reelection campaign.
Who organized the Stormtroopers to hunt down Kenobi in the first place? It wasn't Vader but he'll take the credit.

Bleh, if this keeps up I'm moving to Dagobah.
 

CosmoK

New member
Oct 25, 2009
26
0
0
I smell Imperial conspiracy!

Oh yeah...

...and good luck in finding Obi-Wans body in space. Ashes thrown out of the Deathstar's airlock, my a**...

EDIT: Ahaha! Didn't read the original article before posting. They do indeed claim to have thrown his remains out of an airlock. :D
 

CK76

New member
Sep 25, 2009
1,620
0
0
For the first time the comment section (on the source site) of a new spiece is truly enjoyable filled with amazing amounts of nerdy humor. Seriously, showing how silly the political state has been these past years through the lens of Star Wars is comedy gold.
 

Calbeck

Bearer of Pointed Commentary
Jul 13, 2008
758
0
0
In breaking news, a porn stash was found in Obi-Wan's Tatooine compound...
 

CosmoK

New member
Oct 25, 2009
26
0
0
Indeed, that should be the next big scoop.

"Wait, these only show 'behind the scenes' footage. Bummer..."
 

Ericb

New member
Sep 26, 2006
368
0
0
Just don't go to the negative-voted comments on the last pages. They break the illusion, but on the other hand, they have proven to me that the comments are from actual users in on the joke. XD